TINC DESTÍ

Vale, eh...

Okay, eh...

Abans de començar us he de comunicar una cosa

Before we start, I need to inform you of something.

que és molt important i que és...

that is very important and that is...

Bé, pot afectar la continuïtat d'aquest podcast.

Well, it could affect the continuity of this podcast.

Vaig rebre una carta l'altre dia del Ministeri de Defensa

I received a letter the other day from the Ministry of Defence.

que m'han cridat a files.

that they have called me to serve.

He de fer la mili. Ja no puc prorrogar-ho més.

I have to do military service. I can no longer postpone it.

Ho he prorrogat tant que fins i tot ja no és obligatòria,

I have extended it so much that it is no longer mandatory.

però tot i així necessito...

but even so I need...

Quan el criden...

When they call him...

Quan el teu país et crida pel deure militar,

When your country calls you for military duty,

jo penso que hi has d'anar.

I think you should go there.

Sí. El que passa és que a mi m'han donat per inútil total.

Yes. The thing is, I have been considered completely useless.

Ah, punyetero. I me n'he salvat.

Ah, bastard. And I got away from it.

Bueno, així és rai.

Well, that's the way it is.

Algú dels tres vol ser el meu nòvio o nòvia de mili?

Does anyone among the three of you want to be my military boyfriend or girlfriend?

Jo. Fantàstic.

Me. Fantastic.

Que convincent, sonat, eh? I que ràpid.

How convincing, right? And so quick.

Jo, joder. Vale, guai, anem a l'estació i ens acomiadem.

Me, damn. Okay, cool, let's go to the station and say goodbye.

Ens enviem cartes. Nudes, totes aquestes...

We send each other letters. Naked, all of these...

Tic-tocs. Tic-tocs.

Tick-tocks. Tick-tocks.

Sisplau. Aquestes coses. Vale, guai, guai, gràcies.

Please. These things. Okay, cool, cool, thank you.

Ens fem paies cibernètiques.

We make cyberpayments.

Sexting.

Sexting.

Vull dir, la gent que està a la mili deuen fer sexting.

I mean, the people who are in the military must be sexting.

Vale.

Okay.

La gent que fa la mili, avui dia.

The people who do military service these days.

Bueno, que no sigui obligatòria no vol dir que no existeixi, no?

Well, just because it isn't mandatory doesn't mean it doesn't exist, right?

Suposo que et pots...

I suppose you can...

Por amor a la arte, no?

For the love of art, right?

Claro.

Sure.

A la patria.

To the homeland.

A l'arte de España.

To the art of Spain.

Exacte. Hi ha gent que s'ho planteja, hi ha gent que...

Exactly. There are people who consider it, there are people who...

En fi.

Anyway.

Tot això era una petita ficció, era un petit sketch.

All of this was a small fiction, it was a little sketch.

No és veritat. En realitat ja la vaig fer a la mili. No, no.

It's not true. In fact, I already did it in the military. No, no.

Llavors...

So...

A què ve això, doncs?

What is this about, then?

Doncs perquè estem a punt de comentar el capítol Tinc destí, on el David Güell, ni el David Maganya nostre, ni el David Gascon també nostre,

Well, because we are about to discuss the chapter I Have a Destiny, where David Güell, neither our David Maganya, nor our David Gascon,

sinó el David Güell, el David fictici de la sèrie, doncs li passa exactament el que acabo de descriure.

but David Güell, the fictional David of the series, goes through exactly what I just described.

Voleu que llegeixi la sinopsi?

Do you want me to read the synopsis?

Home, Jaume, sisplau.

Come home, Jaume, please.

Quina pregunta és aquesta?

What question is this?

Sisplau. Si en algun moment algú té una pregunta o alguna cosa, pot aixecar el dit i jo aclareixo més coses, no?

Please. If at any moment someone has a question or something, they can raise their hand and I will clarify more things, right?

Per si, per exemple, algú no hagués vist el capítol, per dir alguna cosa, eh? Vale.

Just in case, for example, someone hasn't seen the episode, just to say something, okay?

No sé de qui estàs parlant.

I don't know who you are talking about.

Jo vull, abans de començar, dir que el gag no estava preparat al principi, has començat tu, i t'hem seguit.

I want to say, before we start, that the gag was not planned at first, you started it, and we followed you.

Sí.

Yes.

I m'ha agradat.

I liked it.

Jo me l'he cregut, una mica.

I believed it, a little.

M'ha agradat, sí?

I liked it, yes?

No, fins que has dit allò de les llistes. O sigui, quan has dit que el podcast podia acabar, jo m'ho he cregut.

No, until you said that about the lists. I mean, when you said the podcast could end, I believed it.

Ah, ah, és que això, això...

Ah, ah, it's just that this, this...

La formació. La formació d'interpretació.

The training. The interpretation training.

Tipo que ens deixes de sobte, estàs en directe.

Type that you suddenly leave us, you are live.

No ho suporto, adeu!

I can't stand it, goodbye!

No, no.

No, no.

Com un nòvio tòxic, no?

Like a toxic boyfriend, right?

He anat a aquest programa per dir-te que...

I have gone to this program to tell you that...

Ole, que ja en tenen tres, no?

Wow, they already have three, right?

Exacte.

Exact.

Te puse los cuernos, con otro podcast.

I cheated on you, with another podcast.

M'han fitxat...

I've been signed...

Si és en castellà és més dramàtic, eh?

If it's in Spanish, it's more dramatic, right?

Te puse los cuernos.

I cheated on you.

Con otro podcast.

With another podcast.

M'han fitxat a Tengo Podcast, donde comentamos platos sucios, la sèrie mítica de ETV, i,

I have been signed on to Tengo Podcast, where we discuss Dirty Dishes, the legendary series from ETV, and,

bueno, pues, adiós.

Well, then, goodbye.

No.

No.

Vale.

Okay.

Aviam, la sinopsi, doncs, diu així.

Let's see, the synopsis says this.

El David rep una carta del Ministeri de Seguretat de la Generalitat de Madrid a la senyora

David receives a letter from the Ministry of Security of the Generalitat of Madrid addressed to the lady.

Luz.

Light.

La senyora Luz.

Mrs. Luz.

I el David rep una carta del Ministeri de Defensa avisant-lo que ha de fer la mili.

And David receives a letter from the Ministry of Defense informing him that he has to serve in the military.

Així que intenta escapolir-se'n, però no pot.

So he tries to escape, but he can't.

Mentrestant, el Ramon es troba separat de la dona.

Meanwhile, Ramon finds himself separated from his wife.

Només per quatre dies, però tècnicament s'han separat.

Only for four days, but technically they have separated.

Així doncs, suplica al López que li llogui a l'habitació del David mentre ell sigui

Thus, he begs López to rent him David's room while he is there.

fora.

out.

Com que el López no cedeix, el Ramon li fa recordar que ha de pagar 90.000 pessetes de

Since López won't give in, Ramon reminds him that he has to pay 90,000 pesetas of

lloguer, i que sense un company serà complicat.

rent, and that without a roommate it will be complicated.

Més tard, abans de marxar resignat cap al tren que el portarà al seu destí...

Later, before resignedly heading to the train that will take him to his destination...

El David fa prometre al López que no llogarà la seva habitació, el seu santuari,

David makes López promise that he won't rent out his room, his sanctuary.

i fins i tot li deixa pagats dos mesos sencers i avisa que ha indicat a sa mare

And even pays him for two whole months and warns that he has informed his mother.

que segueixi enviant diners en la seva absència.

that he continues to send money in his absence.

A part, també aprofita per fer-se nòvia de l'Emma, per tenir una nòvia d'Emili

On the side, she also takes the opportunity to become Emma's girlfriend, to have a girlfriend of Emili.

i així poder enviar-se cartes, portar una foto seva a la cartera, etc.

and thus be able to send letters, carry a photo of oneself in the wallet, etc.

Instants després que hagi marxat, el Ramon es presenta al pis dels nois, maletes en mà,

Moments after he has left, Ramon arrives at the boys' apartment, suitcase in hand.

i dona 45.000 peles al López tal com havia encarat.

And give 45,000 pesetas to López as I had arranged.

L'endemà, el David apareix al pis per sorpresa.

The next day, David appears at the apartment unexpectedly.

Diu que l'han deixat per inútil i no pot fer l'Emili.

He says they left him for useless and he can't be like Emili.

El López intenta que no es descobreixi el que ha fet, però de seguida és enxampat.

López tries to keep what he has done a secret, but he is quickly caught.

El David, l'Emma, que ja no és la seva nòvia, i la Carbonell confronten el López pel seu comportament.

David, Emma, who is no longer his girlfriend, and Carbonell confront López about his behavior.

Ell s'excusa en què estava ajudant una amiga en un mal moment,

He excuses himself by saying he was helping a friend in a tough situation.

però el Ramon confessa que en realitat la dona no l'ha deixat

but Ramon confesses that in reality the woman hasn't left him

i de pas explica que el López li va cobrar lloguer, igualment.

And by the way, he explains that López charged him rent, anyway.

Finalment es descobreix que el David no va arribar a presentar-se a fi.

Finally, it is discovered that David did not show up in the end.

I els personatges fan una barricada al pis, temorosos de les represàlies de les forces armades.

And the characters build a barricade in the apartment, fearful of the reprisals from the armed forces.

Però vols dir que això és per relaxar algú?

But do you mean that this is to relax someone?

Sí, com la gent aquesta que fa TikToks.

Yes, like those people who make TikToks.

Una cosa és que jo no ho suporto.

One thing is that I can't stand it.

A l'ASMR no el feu, perquè...

Don't do ASMR, because...

Vale, doncs no el farem, no el farem.

Okay, then we won't do it, we won't do it.

Capítol 69.

Chapter 69.

Sobretot la gent que menja...

Above all, the people who eat...

No, aquest és el capítol 8.

No, this is chapter 8.

No és el 69, tinc una erecció?

Isn't it 69, do I have an erection?

Doncs de veritat que em fos de capítol.

Well, it really would be in the chapter.

T'havies d'apuntar d'aquesta, de l'esquí.

You had to sign up for this one, for skiing.

No, no, ha sortit.

No, no, it has come out.

L'ha portat apuntada.

She has brought it noted down.

Ha sortit.

He has left.

Com estem? Què està passant?

How are we? What's happening?

Doncs no ho sé, però tot això de començar ja amb nòvies fake i tal,

Well, I don't know, but all this about starting with fake girlfriends and all that,

crec que ens ha posat en una predisposició.

I believe that he/she has put us in a predisposition.

In the mood for love.

In the mood for love.

I crec que al principi del capítol,

I think that at the beginning of the chapter,

que l'Emma agafés un bon parell de pollastres amb les mans,

that Emma took a good pair of chickens in her hands,

directament amb les mans, també hi té a veure.

directly with the hands, it also has to do with that.

Això et posa, David, això t'agrada.

This turns you on, David, you like this.

M'ha semblat estrany.

It seemed strange to me.

La gent que no té el carnet de manipulador d'aliments,

People who do not have a food handler's card,

a tu t'excita.

You get excited.

És un fetitge com un altre, no?

It's a fetish like any other, isn't it?

Un pollastre amb cada mà, no?

A chicken in each hand, right?

És a dir, no ens ha sobtat a vosaltres que portessin pollastres a l'ast?

That is to say, weren't you surprised that they were bringing roasted chickens?

No, però no estan a l'ast encara, estan crus, no?

No, but they are not on the spit yet, they are raw, right?

Estan crus?

Are they raw?

Jo crec que estan crus.

I think they are raw.

Jo els he vist amb color d'auradet.

I have seen them with a golden color.

Estan cruets.

They are raw.

Doncs jo els havia vist d'auradets i m'ha sobtat que els agafessin amb les mans nues.

Well, I had seen them golden and I was surprised that they were picked up with bare hands.

A mi el que m'ha sobtat, parlant de mans,

What has surprised me, speaking of hands,

el David, tu i ell, descobrim que té una pel·lícula de suor en les mans constantment, això diuen,

David, you and I discover that he constantly has a film of sweat on his hands, that's what they say.

així que el López no deixa que toqui els pollastres.

so López doesn't let me touch the chickens.

No fos cas que agafin la triquinosi.

Just in case they catch trichinosis.

Però la triquinosi...

But trichinosis...

Sabem el que és?

Do we know what it is?

Sí, sí, ho he buscat.

Yes, yes, I have looked it up.

La triquinosi és una malaltia parasitària que es pot contraure si es menja carn mal cuinada.

Trichinosis is a parasitic disease that can be contracted if poorly cooked meat is eaten.

O sigui, no té res a veure amb el contacte.

That is, it has nothing to do with the contact.

O sigui, si allò ho cuines bé, ho mata tot, bueno, no ho sé.

I mean, if you cook it well, it kills everything, well, I don't know.

A casa vostra no s'ha dit mai el tema de la triquinosi?

Has the topic of trichinosis ever been mentioned at your house?

No.

No.

A casa meva sempre ho deien.

At my house, they always said so.

T'agafarà la triquinosi, però fora de context.

You'll get trichinosis, but out of context.

O sigui, a l'igual sabien que era una bactèria que es contraia a través de la carn, saps?

So, just like they knew it was a bacterium that was contracted through meat, you know?

O sigui, no entris a l'aigua abans de fer la digestió,

That is, do not enter the water before digesting.

triquinosi, saps?

trichinosis, you know?

Triquinosi com a malaltia...

Trichinosis as a disease...

No miris la tele tan de prop, nen, que agafaràs la triquinosi.

Don't look at the TV so closely, kid, or you'll catch trichinosis.

És que fa molt de nom de malaltia inventada, 100%.

It's just that it sounds very much like an invented disease, 100%.

Triquinosi.

Trichinosis.

La típica que et dona així com...

The typical one that gives you something like...

Va a aigua freda, de cop.

It goes to cold water, suddenly.

Ai, parlant de pares, tinc feedback.

Oh, speaking of parents, I have feedback.

Secció feedback, un moment.

Feedback section, one moment.

Sent, sent.

Sorry, sorry.

Ma mare m'ha arrenyat.

My mother scolded me.

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

No.

No.

Perquè diu que va pel carrer escoltant-nos

Because he says he walks down the street listening to us.

i es comença a riure ella sola

and she starts to laugh by herself

i que, clar, queda com una puta boja.

And it, of course, ends up looking like a crazy whore.

I que això, doncs, no li convé.

And that, therefore, does not suit him.

Oh, és una arrenyada bonica.

Oh, it's a beautiful mess.

És una arrenyada bonica.

It's a beautiful roof.

És molt pitjor.

It is much worse.

Com semblava que anava cap a una banda, però després...

As it seemed to be going one way, but then...

Perquè us ho he explicat així, en realitat, no?

Because I've explained it to you this way, actually, right?

Bueno, sí que m'ha dit una mica...

Well, yes, he has told me a little...

Hosti, tu estigues amb el podcast aquest, vaia, vaia.

Wow, you're into that podcast, huh?

Diu que li va fer molta gràcia el capítol 6

He says that he found chapter 6 very funny.

quan estem parlant de pares hippies

when we are talking about hippie parents

i que ella mateixa estava pensant

and that she herself was thinking

però com és que no parla de mi aquest paio que pot?

but how is it that this guy who can doesn't talk about me?

I després vas parlar-ne.

And then you talked about it.

Sí, sí, no te'n recordes ja, David?

Yes, yes, you don't remember it anymore, David?

Sí, en memòria tens.

Yes, in memory you have.

Bueno, mira.

Well, look.

Tinc aquí, perquè a veure si és el que confio en tu, eh?

I have it here because let's see if it's what I trust you for, okay?

Què tinc apuntat?

What do I have noted down?

Triquinosis, què és?

Trichinosis, what is it?

Jo també et faig una pregunta pel Jaume

I also have a question for Jaume.

perquè segur que sé que l'ha buscat.

because I’m sure that I know he/she has looked for it.

Que és a quin any deixa de ser obligatòria l'Emili?

What year does the Emili cease to be mandatory?

Al 2001.

In 2001.

És increïble, és una font de sabiesa, aquest senyor.

It's incredible, this man is a fountain of wisdom.

Ho sabia, ho sabia.

I knew it, I knew it.

I una de les fonts que vaig consultar

And one of the sources I consulted

em deia la data exacta, però a Viquipèdia no hi és.

It told me the exact date, but it is not on Wikipedia.

Per tant, jo no ho sé, ja no...

Therefore, I don't know, not anymore...

Si no és a Viquipèdia no t'he credibilitat.

If it's not on Wikipedia, I don't believe you.

A veure, perdona que us ho digui, eh?

Let me just say this, okay?

Però la Viquipèdia la pot editar el Paco de Talleres.

But Wikipedia can be edited by Paco from Talleres.

No, no, no, perquè hi ha gent que està allà a la Guait

No, no, no, because there are people who are there at the Guait.

i si tu poses...

and if you put...

Jo ho he fet alguna vegada, a lo tonto, saps?

I've done it a few times, you know, just casually?

Una novieta que vaig tenir, doncs vaig dir...

A girlfriend I had, well I said...

Era de no sé quin poble

It was from I don't know which village.

i vaig anar a l'article del seu poble

I went to the article of his/her village.

i va dir Ciutadans i Il·lustres.

He said Citizens and Illustrious.

Ah, aquesta novieta meva!

Ah, this girlfriend of mine!

I clar, va durar cinc minuts allò,

And of course, that lasted five minutes,

lo suficient perquè ella ho veiés i digués

enough for her to see it and say

Oh! I ja està.

Oh! That's it.

Oh, que romàntic!

Oh, how romantic!

Perquè hi ha gent que està a la Guait i t'ho treu.

Because there are people who are on the lookout and take it from you.

És maco, no? És una tonteria.

It's nice, isn't it? It's nonsense.

Oh, Jennifer!

Oh, Jennifer!

És una jarega que et sap per tu.

It's a jar that knows for you.

És la cançó més romàntica que se us ha acudit.

It is the most romantic song that has come to your mind.

Bé, és que jo he fet una variació de la lletra.

Well, it's just that I made a variation of the lyrics.

Bueno, podem cantar Strangers in the night.

Well, we can sing Strangers in the Night.

Ah, has canviat la lletra, tu.

Ah, you have changed the lyrics, haven't you?

Jo he posat Editaria Wikipedia per tu.

I have put Wikipedia Editing for you.

La mètrica està ben encaixada, eh?

The meter is well fitted, isn't it?

Com es nota que estudia música i can, eh?

How it shows that you study music and singing, huh?

És veritat, aquest paio.

It's true, this guy.

Canta'ns una mica, David.

Sing us a little, David.

Quina cançó?

Which song?

Canta'ns la cançó de Plats Bruts.

Sing us the song of Plats Bruts.

Posa-li lletra.

Put lyrics to it.

La lletra surt, és tipus karaoke.

The lyrics appear, it's like karaoke.

Diu que és ju-ju-ju-ju-juel Joan, dadadada-dadada-dadada David.

He says it’s ju-ju-ju-ju-João, dadadada-dadada-dadada David.

I així segueixes, digues.

And so you continue, tell me.

Vale, jo feia gimnàstica artística, vale?, quan era petita.

Okay, I used to do artistic gymnastics, okay?, when I was little.

Crec que això ens ho has explicat, ja.

I think you have already explained this to us.

Ah, doncs llavors no em callo.

Ah, then I won't be quiet.

Si algú vol saber l'anècdota, que vagi al capítol 2, tinc por.

If anyone wants to know the anecdote, go to chapter 2, I'm scared.

Segurament, és que ja tinc una memòria de peixos.

Probably, it's because I already have the memory of a fish.

O al capítol 3.

Or in chapter 3.

No, va, explica'ns-ho.

No, come on, tell us.

Bueno, recà, hi havia una companya meva del meu equip

Well, indeed, there was a colleague of mine from my team.

que feia la cançó de Plats Bruts.

what the song from Plats Bruts was about.

Ah, sí, sí, sí.

Ah, yes, yes, yes.

I al públic hi havia algú que potser li sonava aquesta cançó.

And in the audience, there was someone who perhaps recognized this song.

Sí, i el públic estava el López, l'actor, el Jordi Cruz.

Yes, and the audience included López, the actor, and Jordi Cruz.

No, Jordi Cruz.

No, Jordi Cruz.

Aquest campió és normal.

This champion is normal.

Actor i xef.

Actor and chef.

Jo el confonc molt sovint, el Jordi Cruz i el Jordi Sánchez.

I often confuse Jordi Cruz and Jordi Sánchez.

És que el Jordi Cruz hi ha dos, el bueno i el malo, no?

There are two Jordi Cruz, the good one and the bad one, right?

Sí, és veritat.

Yes, it is true.

Qualsevol dels dos s'assembla.

Either of the two looks similar.

Sí, el de l'Art Attack i el de Masterchef.

Yes, the one from Art Attack and the one from Masterchef.

Adivina quin és el bueno i adivina quin és el malo.

Guess which one is the good one and guess which one is the bad one.

L'Art Attack és el malo, no?

Art Attack is the bad guy, right?

No, és el bueno.

No, he is the good one.

És el bueno?

Is he the good one?

Sí.

Yes.

Jo pensava que li agradava la farlopa.

I thought he liked the cocaine.

Bueno, però és bueno igual.

Well, but it's good anyway.

Però ens cau bé.

But we like him/her.

És el malo i l'altre no és tan malo.

He is the bad one and the other is not so bad.

Li agradava el mejunja.

He liked the mixture.

Jordi Cruz no és només el d'Art Attack,

Jordi Cruz is not only the one from Art Attack,

també és la veu de Flick a Bichos, una aventura en miniatura.

he is also the voice of Flick in A Bug's Life.

Això s'ha de reconèixer.

This must be recognized.

Coses que no sabies hace cinco minutos.

Things you didn't know five minutes ago.

Parlant de pares, que ja abans hem fet servir aquesta fórmula

Speaking of parents, we have already used this formula before.

per incitar a un tema.

to incite a topic.

Parlant de pares, veiem la mare de David.

Speaking of parents, we see David's mother.

Ah, sí, la Consol.

Ah, yes, Consol.

Però no fa res.

But it doesn't matter.

Bueno, sí, porta les cartes.

Well, yes, bring the cards.

I sispa.

And sispa.

I els pollastres.

And the chickens.

Però no torna a sortir.

But he/she doesn’t go out again.

I en el següent capítol tampoc.

And in the following chapter neither.

Sí, ja passa a vegades això per als grups, no?

Yes, that happens sometimes with groups, doesn't it?

Com que surt un personatge una mica per la cara.

As it turns out, a character appears a bit out of nowhere.

Com ho saps, el del següent capítol, David?

How do you know, the one from the next chapter, David?

Perquè m'he vist dos.

Because I have seen two of myself.

Hola!

Hello!

S'ha avançat feina per la setmana que ve.

Work has been completed in advance for next week.

Però si és el proper dia, com que veiem.

But if it's the next day, as we see.

He trencat la màgia.

I have broken the magic.

Doncs sí, la Consol, és veritat, apareix per una escena,

Well yes, Consol, it's true, she appears for a scene,

diu quatre tonteries i desapareix de la sèrie un altre cop.

says four nonsense and disappears from the series again.

És curiós.

It's curious.

Sí, a mi m'ha sorprès.

Yes, it surprised me.

M'ha sobtat perquè, a més a més, crec que no la coneixíem

It surprised me because, furthermore, I think we didn't know her.

o l'havíem vist només al capítol que venia a anar a buscar-lo.

or we had only seen him in the episode where he came to pick him up.

El primer capítol apareix, sí.

The first chapter appears, yes.

I no parlava gaire.

And I didn't talk much.

No, és veritat, parla més el marit.

No, it's true, the husband speaks more.

El pare, sí.

The father, yes.

Llavors he pensat, què ve a fer?

Then I thought, what is he coming for?

Doncs explica que llegeix les cartes d'amor del seu fill

Well, she says that she reads her son's love letters.

i poca cosa més.

and not much more.

Què en pensem de cartes d'amor?

What do we think about love letters?

En rebeu? En escriviu?

Do you receive it? Do you write it?

De petita havia escrit alguna.

As a child, I had written some.

Sí?

Yes?

Sí.

Yes.

Però...

But...

Però me reixessaron.

But they laughed at me.

No!

No!

Sí.

Yes.

Julio Norberto no me quería.

Julio Norberto didn't love me.

I sa mare se la va llegir?

And did her mother read it?

Home, doncs espero que no, perquè quedava jo bastant malament.

Well, I hope not, because it would leave me looking quite bad.

Era d'amor, però era bastant al gran, o què?

It was about love, but was it quite big, or what?

M'agradaria compartir pupitre amb tu.

I would like to share a desk with you.

Ui, ui, ui, ui.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

A mi m'agrada com puja la canalla.

I like how the children are growing up.

M'agradaria compartir pupitre amb tu.

I would like to share a desk with you.

Aquí veus la mètrica una mica forçada.

Here you see the meter is somewhat forced.

No, se'ns han anat a les mans.

No, they have slipped through our hands.

Buà, però que intens, no?

Wow, but that's intense, isn't it?

O sigui, jo...

That is to say, I...

Crec que alguna vegada també havia escrit alguna carta d'amor.

I think that sometime I had also written a love letter.

Trobo que no s'hauria de perdre, això.

I think this should not be lost.

O sigui, és maco.

So, it's nice.

Ja, però és que ara passa que jo no sé ni enviar una carta.

Yes, but the thing is that I don't even know how to send a letter.

Tipo, no sé, genzeta, eh?

Like, I don't know, gen z, right?

Però em dius, envia una carta.

But you tell me, send a letter.

No sé com es fa.

I don't know how it is done.

Bueno, vas a correus i...

Well, you go to the post office and...

Compro un segell i el poso en una bústia, no?

I buy a stamp and put it in a mailbox, right?

Sobre i segell, sí.

On the seal, yes.

Però és com una màgia allà que es fa, que no acabo d'entendre.

But it's like a magic there that happens, which I don't quite understand.

Hi ha gent que la porta del punt A al punt B...

There are people who take it from point A to point B...

Això m'ho podia imaginar.

I could imagine that.

Com lo de Willy Wonka, no?

Like Willy Wonka, right?

Els ombalumpes que per la nit surten allà...

The ombalumpes that come out at night there...

És igual, perquè jo no sé...

It doesn't matter, because I don't know...

O potser no m'hi he fixat, però mai he vist un cartell d'una bústia.

Or maybe I haven't noticed it, but I've never seen a sign for a mailbox.

Totes les bústies estan connectades per una sèrie de tubs.

All the mailboxes are connected by a series of tubes.

Saps?

You know?

Tipus Futurama, que anava per un tub lliure.

Futurama type, which went through a free tube.

És una bona conspiració.

It's a good conspiracy.

Tipus Lazy Town.

Lazy Town type.

Ah, també, també, bon referent.

Ah, yes, yes, good reference.

Hòstia, perdoneu.

Damn, sorry.

És Portacús.

It is Portacús.

Quina ràbia em feia Lazy Town, eh?

How annoying Lazy Town used to make me, huh?

Ja estàs, Lazy Town.

You're all set, Lazy Town.

Jo mai he vist Lazy Town, la veritat.

I have never seen Lazy Town, the truth.

Jo us volia fer un pitch de just...

I wanted to give you a pitch about just...

La ciutat dels vagos.

The city of the slackers.

Quan acabem aquest podcast, fem un podcast de Lazy Town, però...

When we finish this podcast, we'll do a Lazy Town podcast, but...

No, no, primer va el de les tresines, perdona.

No, no, first comes the one with the thrusters, sorry.

També, també, és veritat.

Also, also, it's true.

Jo, a les Portacús, pensava que t'agafi un infart ja.

I, at the Portacús, thought you would have a heart attack by now.

Para de comer putes manzanes!

Stop eating fucking apples!

Sí, sí, començava el capítol de...

Yes, yes, the chapter of... was starting.

Vull buscar el correu!

I want to search for the email!

Tres flics flacs, l'has pagat, i després...

Three flic-flacs, you've paid for it, and then...

Pensava, pots anar a buscar el correu com una persona normal?

I was thinking, can you go get the mail like a normal person?

Anar a l'entrada de casa teva i agafar la puta carta?

Go to the entrance of your house and grab the damn letter?

Com es deia el dolent?

What was the name of the villain?

Robi...

Robi...

Robi Roten.

Robi Roten.

Robi Wanke Novi.

Robi Wanke New.

En anglès és Robi Roten, però aquí no sé si ho van adoptar.

In English, it is Robi Roten, but I don't know if they adopted it here.

No me'n recordo.

I don't remember.

Però aquí m'és igual, perquè veia les Portacús i deia, vull marxar d'aquí.

But here I don’t care, because I was looking at the Portacús and saying, I want to leave here.

Estem molt lluny del nostre tema, eh?

We are very far from our topic, aren't we?

Ah, sí, és veritat, parlàvem de plats bruts.

Ah, yes, it’s true, we were talking about dirty dishes.

Molt bé, doncs hem comentat una mica la primera escena.

Very well, then we have discussed a bit about the first scene.

Jo us anava a dir, parlant de cartes, que jo, la veritat és que n'he enviat poques i n'he rebut menys.

I was going to tell you, speaking of letters, that the truth is I have sent few and received even fewer.

Aleshores, per si algun oient s'anima, la meva direcció és Passeig de l'Estació número 8, 5a Primera,

So, if any listener feels encouraged, my address is Passeig de l'Estació number 8, 5th First.

3.800 valls.

3,800 valleys.

O sigui, si em voleu enviar una puta carta, us juro que em farà molta il·lusió.

So, if you want to send me a damn letter, I swear it will make me very happy.

Ues, que devia ser molt guai ser famosa en aquella època en què la gent fan enviar-me cartes.

Yeah, it must have been really cool to be famous at a time when people would send me letters.

I que us arribessin com cartes i àlbums i coses, o sigui, seria èpic.

And that they would arrive as letters and albums and things, I mean, it would be epic.

Sí, la gent fan-ho, segueix fent, eh?

Yes, people do it, keep doing it, right?

Perquè jo segueixo a Rosalia, a TikTok i a Instagram, i li envia molta gent cartes.

Because I follow Rosalia on TikTok and Instagram, and many people send her letters.

O sigui, a dia d'avui ja segueix fent, no tant com a normalitzat, com abans,

That is to say, as of today it is still happening, not as normalized as before.

que era com l'única mena de comunicació que tenies, així com més romàntica.

that it was like the only kind of communication you had, as well as more romantic.

Però ara s'utilitza com per donar com més valor a la comunicació, saps?

But now it is used to add more value to communication, you know?

No és el mateix rebre una carta que rebre un WhatsApp.

It is not the same to receive a letter as it is to receive a WhatsApp.

Òbviament, és molt més sentimental i és com que penetra més.

Obviously, it is much more sentimental and it penetrates more.

Però la meva pregunta és, com aconsegueixes la seva direcció?

But my question is, how do you get their address?

Doncs, si la dones en un podcast, ja està.

Well, if you give it in a podcast, that's it.

Aquest problema ja us l'he resolt, estimada audiència.

I have already solved this problem for you, dear audience.

I les persones famoses, o sigui, quin rotllo, no?

And famous people, I mean, what a drag, right?

Bueno, s'han de canviar el telèfon 50.000 vegades al mes, perquè la gent està molt boja.

Well, the phone has to be changed 50,000 times a month because people are very crazy.

Clar, per això, vull dir, no sé.

Of course, that's why, I mean, I don't know.

Bueno, com la cançó aquesta d'Eminem, d'Estan, no?

Well, like that song by Eminem, Stan, right?

Segur que quina és?

Are you sure which one it is?

Sí.

Yes.

Canta-la.

Sing it.

I llavors hi ha el rap de...

And then there is the rap of...

I el rap és una carta que li envia un fan tot el rato,

And the rap is a letter that a fan sends him all the time,

i que està superboig i té una relació molt tòxica.

and he is super crazy and has a very toxic relationship.

Llavors, el dia en què l'Eminem obre la carta i ho llegeix tot,

Then, the day Eminem opens the letter and reads it all,

es dona compte que el tio que s'ha matat cada vegada per les notícies

He realizes that the guy who has killed himself every time because of the news.

és el seu fan de turno, que s'ha matat perquè l'Eminem no el contestava.

He is the current fan who killed himself because Eminem wouldn't answer him.

No m'ho crec.

I don't believe it.

En sèrio? Va d'això, la cançó?

Seriously? Is that what the song is about?

Sí, sí, va d'això, va d'això.

Yes, yes, it's about that, it's about that.

I per això acaba i diu...

And that's why it ends and says...

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

I diu, it was you.

And he says, it was you.

Car crash. I així s'acaba.

Car crash. And so it ends.

Renoi.

Wow.

Doncs, estimada audiència, si heu de fer això, no, eh?

Well, dear audience, if you have to do this, no, right?

Cartes maques.

Pretty letters.

Si em feu preguntes, em sentiré com el Big Man del món del Big Man.

If you ask me questions, I will feel like the Big Man of the Big Man world.

Tenim el mateix patinat.

We have the same skate.

Hòstia, m'agradaria moltíssim que rebessis cartes i les portessis aquí al podcast

Wow, I would really love for you to receive letters and bring them here to the podcast.

i les obríssim i responguessin preguntes.

and we opened them and they answered questions.

Seria preciós.

It would be beautiful.

I cartes perfumades, com a gris.

And scented letters, like grey.

Com es deia la protagonista? Tinc un lapsus.

What was the name of the protagonist? I have a lapse.

Sandy.

Sandy.

Sandy li tirava perfum a les cartes que l'enviava.

Sandy sprayed perfume on the letters she sent.

Però no era la Rizzo la que feia això?

But wasn't it Rizzo who did this?

No, la Sandy.

No, Sandy.

La Frankie.

The Frankie.

La Frankie li va ensenyar a tirar perfum a les cartes.

Frankie taught her to spray perfume on the cards.

Que té com no sé quants nòvios...

That has, I don't know how many boyfriends...

Que té no sé quants nòvios que estan, de fet, fent servei militar.

That has I don't know how many boyfriends who are, in fact, doing military service.

Sí.

Yes.

La Frankie.

The Frankie.

Un nòvio en cada puerto.

A boyfriend in every port.

Nòvia de mili.

Military girlfriend.

That's why, man.

That's why, man.

Guaca, guaca.

Quack, quack.

Molt re.

Very little.

Doncs he de dir que m'agrada molt més la carta que el WhatsApp

Well, I have to say that I like the letter much more than WhatsApp.

perquè és molt menys invasiva,

because it is much less invasive,

perquè sempre pots justificar que no l'has obert,

because you can always justify that you haven't opened it,

perquè no té tic blau.

because it doesn't have a blue tick.

O és que el cartell ha perdut o el que sigui.

Or is it that the poster has been lost or whatever.

Per mil coses.

For a thousand things.

La teva leixuça ha marxat, s'ha estampat.

Your leichu has left, it has crashed.

Tries tu quan...

You try when...

Sí.

Yes.

És com un misteri.

It's like a mystery.

No hi ha pressió per respondre a una carta.

There is no pressure to respond to a letter.

No és algú tan privat com la teva butxaca,

It is not someone as private as your pocket,

que sembla que algú t'estigui cridant tota l'estona.

It seems like someone is shouting at you all the time.

És de la butxaca.

It's out of pocket.

El WhatsApp no et deixa espai.

WhatsApp doesn't give you space.

No sé si us passa,

I don't know if it happens to you,

però és que com que a vegades us sentiu com...

but it's just that sometimes you feel like...

Us sentiu com agobiats.

You feel overwhelmed.

De dir, sisplau, no vull contestar, deixa'm en pau.

Please, I don’t want to answer, leave me alone.

Jo no sóc tan popo.

I am not that silly.

No, no, popo.

No, no, poopy.

No, popo.

No, popo.

Jo no sóc gens popo.

I am not at all popo.

O sigui, de la feina a casa i de casa a la feina.

That is, from work to home and from home to work.

S'ha acabat la meva vida social.

My social life is over.

Arrascobat.

Scratched.

Podem fer un podcast Arrascobat.

We can do a podcast Arrascobat.

De casa a la feina, de la feina a casa i que no em quedi covat.

From home to work, from work to home and hope I don't end up complacent.

Ningú ho veia.

Nobody saw it.

No tinc la referència, ja.

I no longer have the reference.

Jo tampoc.

Me neither.

Mare meva, m'he quedat solíssim.

My goodness, I am all alone.

Doncs haurem d'haver fet un podcast d'Arrascobat.

Then we will have to have made an Arrascobat podcast.

És una sèrie de Juanjo Saez d'animació,

It's an animated series by Juanjo Sáez.

de les poques sèries d'animació per adults de TV3.

one of the few adult animated series on TV3.

Bueno, n'hi ha dues, que les dues són del Juanjo Saez, aquesta,

Well, there are two, both are by Juanjo Saez, this one,

i Heavy Stenders.

i Heavy Stenders.

Bueno, Los Simpsons en català existeixen,

Well, The Simpsons in Catalan exist.

però no és una producció de TV3.

but it is not a production of TV3.

D'acord.

Okay.

Seguim, no?

Shall we continue, right?

Bueno, tornant a Plats Bruts.

Well, back to Plats Bruts.

Ah, sí.

Ah, yes.

De què voleu parlar?

What do you want to talk about?

Voleu comentar alguna cosa més del principi del capítol?

Do you want to comment on anything else at the beginning of the chapter?

A mi m'encanta.

I love it.

Bueno, sí, està bastant bé.

Well, yes, it's quite good.

Què és la teva...

What is your...

Quin diala que et saps de memòria d'aquest capítol, Anna?

What line do you know by heart from this chapter, Anna?

És que no podria acabar mai.

It's just that I could never finish.

Em prefereixo no començar.

I prefer not to start.

Dieu, dieu, parloneu.

God, god, speak to me.

Res, jo volia parlar del privilegi que tenim de la Nou Guerra

Nothing, I wanted to talk about the privilege we have of the New War.

i de la Nobili, en general.

and of the Nobility, in general.

M'estava fumant.

I was smoking.

Que malota.

What a little troublemaker.

ASMR.

ASMR.

Aquest podcast cada cop és més...

This podcast is getting more and more...

És més informal, ja.

It's more informal, you know.

Ha sigut formal, en algun moment?

Has it been formal at any point?

El primer capítol potser una mica,

The first chapter maybe a little,

però perquè el David Maganya tenia febre.

but because David Maganya had a fever.

És veritat, és veritat.

It is true, it is true.

Ostres, sí.

Wow, yes.

Buà, David, l'altre dia vaig tenir un somni

Wow, David, the other day I had a dream.

amb el que participaves.

with what you were participating in.

Ah, sí?

Oh, really?

Sí, després te l'explico.

Yes, I'll explain it to you later.

Molt heavy.

Very heavy.

Activament o passivament?

Actively or passively?

Explica en escena.

Explain on stage.

El puc explicar en escena, si voleu.

I can explain it on stage, if you want.

Sí, endavant.

Yes, go ahead.

Ja que surt.

Since it comes out.

Total.

Total.

Vinga, va.

Come on, let's go.

Doncs la història és que jo feia teatre, vale?

So the story is that I was doing theatre, okay?

Jo faig teatre?

Do I do theater?

No.

No.

Però el meu somni sí.

But my dream does.

Jo t'hi veig fent teatre.

I see you doing theater.

Jo feia teatre abans.

I used to do theater before.

Llavors, anava a teatre a l'escola on jo anava a teatre,

Then, I was going to the theater at the school where I went to theater,

que es deia Eòlia.

who was called Eòlia.

Llavors, jo estava a l'Eòlia i no hi havia ningú,

Then, I was in the Aeolian Islands and there was nobody there,

i el David era el meu company de teatre.

And David was my theater partner.

Llavors, jo li enviava un WhatsApp a el David,

Then, I sent a WhatsApp to David,

on sou?

Where are you?

I em passava una direcció, tipo,

And I was given an address, like,

Carrer Calabria, 291.

Calabria Street, 291.

I jo, bueno, doncs vaig cap allà,

And I, well, I'm going over there,

arribo a la classe de teatre,

I arrive at theatre class,

i de sobte era com una altra classe,

and suddenly it was like another class,

completament diferent.

completely different.

Jo arribo i és una espècie de túnel del terror

I arrive and it's some kind of haunted tunnel.

d'una sèrie de dibuixos animats estranya,

from a series of strange cartoons,

i diuen, avui comencem a veure teatre,

And they say, today we start watching theatre.

anem a repartir els papers, no sé què tal,

let's distribute the papers, I don't know how it will go.

però vets a decidir si o no, si vols entrar,

but you have to decide whether or not, if you want to enter,

perquè clar, jo, però...

because of course, I, but...

I li dic, David, però que no estem a l'Eòlia?

And I tell him, David, aren't we in Aeolia?

I em diu, no hi ha, però això no ho pots dir,

He tells me, there isn't, but you can't say that.

en plan, és com que de sobte estàvem infiltrats

It's like we were suddenly infiltrated.

en dues coses diferents.

in two different things.

Total, que jo dic, bueno, mira,

Overall, I say, well, look,

jo, deixeu-m'ho pensar,

me, let me think about it,

perquè jo ara, hipotecar-me els dissabtes,

because now I have to mortgage my Saturdays,

em fa una mica de pal.

I'm a bit lazy about it.

Me n'anava a fumar un piti,

I was going to smoke a joint,

amb el David i tots els amics que no sé qui eren,

with David and all the friends whose identities I didn't know,

i de sobte estava mirant cap al cel

And suddenly I was looking up at the sky.

i passava una cosa molt èpica,

something very epic was happening,

que és que, doncs, un meteorit

What is a meteor, then?

anava contra la Terra

was going against the Earth

i trencava la capa d'ozó, d'acord?

And it was breaking the ozone layer, okay?

Hòstia!

Holy shit!

Llavors, que pensava que tothom es quedava com...

So, I thought that everyone was left like...

Quan te'n vas en el buit, no?, una mica,

When you go into the void, right? A little bit,

en plan...

in a way...

I tothom es tornava una pança.

And everyone was getting a belly.

En plan, merda, la capa d'ozó!

Like, damn, the ozone layer!

Ha desaparegut!

It has disappeared!

I llavors, clar, seguíem vius,

And then, of course, we were still alive,

però tothom estava super empensinat,

but everyone was super frustrated,

i així, era una moguda,

and so, it was a move,

perquè sabies que quedaven poques hores

because you knew there were only a few hours left

fins que s'acabés com l'oxigen i tal,

until it ended like the oxygen and such,

i ho vaig passar fatal.

And I had a terrible time.

I havíeu de fer l'obra de teatre, encara.

You still had to do the theater play.

No, clar, llavors va passar...

No, of course, then it happened...

Sold out!

Sold out!

Va passar a ser com un altre somni, ja.

It became like another dream, already.

El somni de la capa d'ozó.

The dream of the ozone layer.

Sí, i aquí.

Yes, and here.

Llavors, a poc a poc el vaig veure o alguna cosa

Then, little by little, I saw him or something.

i m'he recordat del somni, ara.

I have remembered the dream, now.

Estic bé fort.

I am very well.

Que fort.

How cool.

Doncs m'agrada molt saber...

Well, I really like knowing...

I m'hauria agradat veure la meva cara empensinada.

I would have liked to see my embarrassed face.

A mi també.

Me too.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

De cop, una nova necessitat.

Suddenly, a new need.

Segur que hi ha un filtre de TikTok.

Surely there is a TikTok filter.

És que no el recordo, eh?

I just don't remember him, okay?

O sigui, el detall de la teva cara empensinada

In other words, the detail of your flushed face.

no recorda la sensació de tornar-te a pensar.

does not remember the feeling of thinking about yourself again.

Aquesta sí.

This one yes.

O sigui, la recordo com una cosa en primera persona.

I mean, I remember it as something in the first person.

Bueno, doncs, moltes gràcies per explicar-m'ho,

Well, thank you very much for explaining it to me.

per somiar amb mi,

to dream with me,

per tenir-me com a actor referent,

to have me as a reference actor,

que jo crec que és el que el teu subconscient intentava dir,

that I believe is what your subconscious was trying to say,

que sóc un referent de la interpretació.

that I am a reference in interpretation.

Exactament, deu ser això.

Exactly, it must be that.

Sí, sí, total.

Yes, yes, totally.

Sembla que hi hagi un huracà, però no.

It seems like there is a hurricane, but there isn't.

O sigui, només és vent.

So, it's just wind.

Volia aclarir-ho.

I wanted to clarify it.

I què és un huracà si no vent?

And what is a hurricane if not wind?

La veta i fumant, també pot ser.

The vein and smoking, it can also be.

Ah, clar, allò que faig...

Ah, of course, what I do...

Fum, després de fumar.

Smoke, after smoking.

I aquí la guerra.

And here the war.

Es nota que he fumat molt, eh?

You can tell that I have smoked a lot, right?

Estava intentant ser sigilosa mentre fumo, però...

I was trying to be stealthy while smoking, but...

Vosaltres...

You all...

No pateixis.

Don't worry.

Vosaltres, eh?

You all, huh?

Jo també.

Me too.

Persones que esteu aquí amb mi fent el podcast.

People who are here with me making the podcast.

Us vull fer una pregunta interessantíssima,

I want to ask you a very interesting question,

que, sí, de sobte he fet com un personatge estrany.

that, yes, suddenly I've acted like a strange character.

Sí, eh?

Yes, huh?

Un personatge, sí.

A character, yes.

Una pregunta molt important, digués.

A very important question, he/she said.

Què faríeu vosaltres si us toqués fer l'Amélie?

What would you do if you had to be Amélie?

L'Amélie.

The Amélie.

Què faríem?

What would we do?

Jo dic que tinc els peus plans.

I say that I have flat feet.

Ah, i amb això ja...

Ah, and with that already...

Saps que la gent es salvava?

Do you know that people were saved?

Pels peus plans?

For flat feet?

Sí, sí, pies planos.

Yes, yes, flat feet.

Era, en plan, una cosa...

It was, like, a thing...

Però per molt que ho diguis, Anna, si ho veuen i no els tens plans...

But no matter how much you say it, Anna, if they see it and you don't have plans...

Jo els aplano.

I flatten them.

No us preocupeu.

Don't worry.

Si poses uns llibres damunt...

If you put some books on top...

Por el bien social, mejor que no represente yo en las filas.

For the social good, it would be better if I did not represent myself in the ranks.

Sí, sí, o sigui, antigament, realment, era així.

Yes, yes, I mean, in the past, really, it was like that.

O sigui, si tu tenies aquesta condició, et deien...

So, if you had this condition, they would tell you...

Vete a tu casa i no vuelves.

Go to your house and don't come back.

Bueno, inútil total.

Well, totally useless.

Pies planos.

Flat feet.

Està bé.

It's fine.

Jo crec que tiraria pel fet que tinc TDA aquí,

I think I would go for the fact that I have ADHD here,

i li demanaria al meu psiquiatre que li fes una nota,

and I would ask my psychiatrist to write him a note,

i llavors, com que segurament em despistaria i acabaria d'esperar els meus,

and then, since I would probably get distracted and end up waiting for mine,

llavors no sortiria a compte, llavors no res.

then it wouldn't be worth it, then nothing.

Això és com quan el Covid, la gent que no volia posar-se mascareta,

This is like when Covid hit, the people who didn't want to wear a mask,

deia que tenia asma, no?

You said you had asthma, didn’t you?

Sí, una mica, sí.

Yes, a little, yes.

Però jo, ara, de sobte, em fascina que algú pogués fer la mili.

But I, now, suddenly, am fascinated that someone could do military service.

Jo soc miop, tampoc...

I am nearsighted, neither...

Amb tants motius per no fer-la, no?

With so many reasons not to do it, right?

Sí, sí, jo no podria fer-la perquè soc molt miop.

Yes, yes, I couldn't do it because I am very nearsighted.

Jo també, no?

Me too, right?

Jo suposo que dirien, tu, agafotas, fora.

I suppose they would say, you, grabbers, out.

Us volia fer una pregunta, jo relacionada amb això,

I wanted to ask you a question, one related to this,

que és...

what is...

O sigui, segur que heu escoltat persones, boomers, no?

So, you’ve probably heard people, boomers, right?

Que s'han lliurat de fer la mili per qüestions X o Y, no?

That they have been exempted from doing military service for reasons X or Y, right?

Sí.

Yes.

Quina és la cascosa més rara que heu escoltat

What is the strangest rumor you have heard?

perquè algú no hagi fet la mili?

why someone hasn't served in the military?

Jo, és que el meu pare també va dir que era miop,

I, it's just that my father also said that he was nearsighted.

i per tant, res.

And therefore, nothing.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Ostres, el meu tiet tenia el cap tan gran

Wow, my uncle had such a big head.

que no tenien cascos per ell, i es va llorar.

that they didn't have helmets for him, and he cried.

Ole!

Yay!

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

Que fort!

How cool!

En sèrio?

Seriously?

En sèrio.

Seriously.

Ah, però...

Ah, but...

Però això és increïble!

But this is incredible!

Se l'he adonat...

I have noticed it...

Molt poca importància per allò increïble que és.

Very little importance for how incredible it is.

Mega Mind, ara, clar.

Mega Mind, now, clear.

Mega Mind, gran pel·lícula, millo tiet.

Mega Mind, great movie, best uncle.

Un cap enorme.

A huge head.

Que em sembla flipant, que sigui...

That I find amazing, that it is...

Sí, sí, és una altra ni vida cabezón, eh?

Yes, yes, it's another life, stubborn one, huh?

Cadete, tenemos malas noticias para ti.

Cadet, we have bad news for you.

No hay ningún casco de tu tamaño.

There is no helmet in your size.

Así que, Doraemon, vete a tu casa.

So, Doraemon, go home.

En la litera, hoy duermes abajo, porque arriba España.

In the bunk, today you sleep below, because above is Spain.

A més a més, em sembla com un pacte...

Furthermore, it seems like a pact to me...

O sea, me imagino que reunían a todos los cadets...

I mean, I imagine they gathered all the cadets...

El que abandona hoy la casa.

The one who leaves the house today.

Operación triunfo, total.

Operation triumph, total.

Número 1.063, un paso para adelante, por favor.

Number 1,063, one step forward, please.

Cadete Badia, es usted un cabezón...

Cadet Badia, you are a stubborn one...

Era reig, però sí.

It was king, but yes.

A su casa, pues reig, pues això...

At his house, well, what a laugh, well, this...

Em sembla flipant, m'ha encantat.

I think it's amazing, I loved it.

Flipant.

Flipping.

Una pregunta només per treure aquesta anècdota, la veritat.

A question just to bring out this anecdote, the truth.

Jo us volia fer la pregunta contrària, no?

I wanted to ask you the opposite question, right?

Al revés.

The other way around.

Històries que us hagin arribat de parents,

Stories that you have received from relatives,

o amics de la família, que sí que hagin fet l'Emili.

Oh friends of the family, who have indeed made Emil.

El meu pare la va fer.

My father made it.

I què tal?

And how about you?

Li van cremar cigarretes als mugrons.

They burned cigarettes on her nipples.

Li van fer moltes putades, i sempre ho recorda.

They did a lot of dirty deeds to him, and he always remembers it.

En plan, jo crec que li ha quedat una espècie de trauma important,

I mean, I think he has developed a kind of significant trauma.

però amb el temps es va començar a adaptar més,

but over time it began to adapt more,

va fer el seu grupet allà, i s'ho va passar bé.

She made her little group there, and she had a good time.

Diu que és el típic pare que diu que va prendre molt a l'Emili.

He says he is the typical father who says he learned a lot from Emili.

Que a la gent li falta més a l'Emili, no?

That people lack more than Emili, right?

Sí, que té falta a Calla, té falta a l'Emili d'aquella època.

Yes, he is missing Calla, he is missing Emili from that time.

On el van destinar?

Where were they assigned?

A la Vall d'Aran.

In the Aran Valley.

Era d'esquiadors escaladors.

It was a climbers' ski resort.

Ole!

Hooray!

Però si això sona de puta mare.

But that sounds amazing.

Sí, sí, encara a dia d'avui segueixen fent quedades

Yes, yes, even today they are still meeting up.

dels companys de l'Emili,

of Emili's colleagues,

i tenen samarretes i tot, en plan...

And they have t-shirts and everything, like...

Jo he dit a la gent...

I have told the people...

Alguien que me quiere mucho me ha traído esto de l'Emili.

Someone who loves me a lot has brought me this from l'Emili.

64.

64.

Una foto d'una K-47 a les samarretes.

A photo of a K-47 on the t-shirts.

Total, així com inofensiva.

All in all, as harmless.

No, no, però en resum, s'ho va passar bé,

No, no, but in summary, he had a good time.

segons el que ens explica.

according to what he/she tells us.

El meu pare també va fer l'Emili,

My father also made the Emili,

i va sobreviure amb la meva mare mentre estava a l'Emili,

and I survived with my mother while I was at Emili,

a Madrid, i llavors, bueno,

to Madrid, and then, well,

no, direm que amb èxit, no?

No, we will say successfully, right?

Mira, tu, ma mare va conèixer el seu primer marit

Look, my mother met her first husband.

perquè estava fent l'Emili a Madrid.

because Emili was in Madrid.

No ella, ell.

Not her, him.

A marit o a Madrid?

A husband or to Madrid?

A Madrid, el marit, que llavors no era marit,

In Madrid, the husband, who was not a husband at that time,

era un tio que feia l'Emili de Valls.

He was a guy who worked as Emili de Valls.

Per això hem acabat a Valls,

That's why we ended up in Valls,

perquè sent ma mare de Madrid i mon pare de Manresa,

because my mother is from Madrid and my father is from Manresa,

ja em dius tu.

you tell me.

Per l'Emili?

For Emili?

S'havia acabat a Valls per l'Emili?

Had it ended in Valls for Emili?

Sí, per l'Emili d'un senyor que no és ni mon pare,

Yes, for Emili from a gentleman who is neither my father,

un senyor que és el pare...

a man who is the father...

Bueno, la meva família és així.

Well, my family is like that.

D'acord.

Okay.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

La cosa és que els altres referents que tinc jo

The thing is that the other references I have.

d'historis de l'Emili són, suposo que poc exemplars,

Emili's stories are, I suppose, few examples.

saps?

do you know?

Vull dir, mon pare el van destinar a Berga,

I mean, my father was sent to Berga,

des de Manresa, és a dir, a 5 minuts de casa,

from Manresa, that is to say, 5 minutes from home,

i es veu que allà era tradició

And it seems that over there it was tradition.

que els que venien de Manresa

that those who were coming from Manresa

els fotien cabos.

they were getting their wires crossed.

O sigui, el tio només arribava, diu,

So, the guy would just arrive, he says,

pues tu, cabo.

well you, corporal.

I estava allà manant...

I was there commanding...

Tot el dia acabant.

All day finishing.

Manejando el cotarro...

Handling the situation...

Era cabo granjero o alguna cosa així.

He was a farmer's major or something like that.

El tio decidia qui es quedava la salxitxa bona.

The guy decided who got the good sausage.

Poder cuidar la cabra,

Being able to take care of the goat,

la cabra de...

the goat of...

De l'exèrcit.

From the army.

És de la legió, però això...

He is from the legion, but this...

Ai, m'he equivocat.

Oh, I made a mistake.

Podem tallar, tallem, no és bona.

We can cut, we cut, it's not good.

No era nòvio de la muerte.

He was not the boyfriend of death.

I el meu tiet és millor encara

And my uncle is even better.

perquè ell ja era cuiner

because he was already a cook

i el van fotre a cuinar a casa del coronel

and they made him cook at the colonel's house

i el tio sempre ha tingut molt de morro.

And the guy has always been very cheeky.

Llavors, si algun sargent o el que fos

So, if any sergeant or whoever

li deia a tu a fer maniobres, vinga,

I was telling you to maneuver, come on,

aixeca't superaviat, que no sé què,

get up super early, because I don't know what,

ell deia, bueno, bueno...

he said, well, well...

Estic fent cardolla.

I am making a mess.

Exacte, vull dir, jo si vols vinc,

Exactly, I mean, if you want I can come.

però si el sargent...

but if the sergeant...

Si després el coronel no té esmorzar a taula,

If later the colonel doesn't have breakfast at the table,

va!

Go!

Jo me lavo les mans, eh?

I wash my hands, okay?

I total, que es va passar la mili

In total, he spent his military service.

fent el que li agradava, que és cuinar, saps?

doing what he liked, which is cooking, you know?

Llavors, clar, ara si em diuen

So, of course, now if they tell me

vols fer la mili, penso, ah, pues que guapo.

Do you want to do military service, I think, oh, well that's cool.

Però en realitat no deu ser tan guapo.

But in reality he must not be that handsome.

Jo he de dir que secretament,

I have to say that secretly,

dintre d'una part subconscient meva,

inside a subconscious part of me,

que ara estic fent conscient en directe per vosaltres,

that I am now doing live consciously for you,

no tinc secret per vosaltres, eh?

I have no secrets for you, okay?

Ja, ho hem notat.

Yes, we have noticed it.

Estic cobrint la meva ànima per vosaltres.

I am covering my soul for you.

Jo crec que potser m'aniria bé fer la mili, eh?

I think it might do me good to do military service, right?

A mi el que em faria gràcia és l'uniforme,

What would make me laugh is the uniform,

perquè em fan gràcia els uniformes.

because I find uniforms amusing.

Però la resta m'és una mica igual.

But the rest is a bit irrelevant to me.

Ni que sigui per treure'ns l'espineta

Even if it's just to get it off our chest.

de veure què tal quedem amb uniforme.

to see how we look in uniform.

Que tothom diu, hòstia, un uniforme, t'esquita.

What everyone says, damn, a uniform, it splashes on you.

Què passa que a mi m'agraden els uniformes antics, saps?

What's going on is that I like old uniforms, you know?

A mi m'agradaria tothom amb l'uniforme reglamentari

I would like everyone in the official uniform.

i jo vestit de soldat napoleònic, saps?

And I dressed as a Napoleonic soldier, you know?

Amb una ploma al casc, ui.

With a feather in the helmet, oh dear.

Una cosa així.

Something like that.

Sí, sí, és molt interessant.

Yes, yes, it is very interesting.

A mi jo crec que a mi m'aniria bé.

I think it would be good for me.

Com una disciplina, un exercici físic, un no sé què...

Like a discipline, a physical exercise, a whatever...

Parlant d'uniformes...

Speaking of uniforms...

Ets un fatxa.

You are a fascist.

Sí.

Yes.

Ah, molt bé.

Ah, very well.

I que la foto que et fan a la mili queda una mica guai,

And the photo they take of you in the army looks a bit cool,

així amb l'uniforme, no?

so with the uniform, right?

Sí, mon pare surtia molt guapo a la foto, eh?

Yes, my father looked very handsome in the photo, right?

Sí.

Yes.

Al meu pare, de fet, li vam fer un regal pels 600 anys,

To my father, in fact, we gave him a gift for his 600th birthday.

que era replicar fotos d'ell de jove,

that was to replicate photos of him as a young man,

amb els meus germans i jo,

with my brothers and me,

que tenim la mateixa cara que el meu pare,

that we have the same face as my father,

i una d'elles és la foto de la mili.

And one of them is the photo from the military service.

Us l'ensenyaria ara mateix, però tinc el mòbil allà.

I would show it to you right now, but my phone is over there.

Ens està gravant.

They are recording us.

El podem superposar.

We can overlap it.

Què hi fa, aquesta càmera?

What is this camera doing here?

Qui ens està gravant?

Who is recording us?

Ens espiren.

They inspire us.

Jo volia explicar una anècdota que potser no té gaire a veure,

I wanted to share an anecdote that might not be very relevant.

però sí té a veure amb els uniformes.

but it does have to do with the uniforms.

A veure.

Let's see.

Una vegada vaig anar a un bar al costat del MACBA,

Once I went to a bar next to the MACBA,

que de tant en tant fan xerrades en plan de sexologia,

that every now and then they hold talks on the subject of sexology,

temes de...

themes of...

És un espai lliure de judici dels altres.

It is a space free of judgment from others.

Llavors, tu vas allà, expliques com les teves filies sexuals,

Then you go there, explain your sexual preferences,

t'obres amb tota la gent que hi ha,

you open up with all the people that are there,

però és tot anònim i ho apuntes en papers.

but it's all anonymous and you note it down on papers.

Llavors ho posen com en un barret...

Then they put it like in a hat...

Però si vas allà, com és anònim?

But if you go there, how is it anonymous?

La cara te la veuen.

They see your face.

No, perquè tu poses un paperet en plan

No, because you put a little note like

la meva filia sexual és X,

my sexual orientation is X,

la poses dins com d'un pot

you put it in like a jar

i ho van traient un sexòleg i una noia també que és sexòloga,

and they were taking out a sexologist and a girl who is also a sexologist,

ho van traient i tal.

they keep taking it out and so on.

Doncs hi havia un senyor que la seva filia sexual...

Well, there was a man whose sexual preference...

Com ho saps que és un senyor si és anònim?

How do you know he's a gentleman if he's anonymous?

Perquè ho va dir.

Because he said it.

Perquè li feia molta il·lusió dir-ho.

Because it excited him a lot to say it.

I al final es va delatar.

And in the end, he/she betrayed himself/herself.

Vaia en un aimat.

Go in a loved one.

Va dir que el seu somni era fer l'amor disfressat

He said that his dream was to make love in disguise.

de soldat de l'època de Napoleó.

of a soldier from the time of Napoleon.

Què? Hòstia, m'han pillat.

What? Damn, I've been caught.

No, no.

No, no.

Sí, sí, no m'ho havia plantejat mai.

Yes, yes, I had never thought about it.

Soldado imperial.

Imperial soldier.

L'imperio romano, no?, d'aquesta persona.

The Roman Empire, right?, of this person.

Però passa molt, eh?

But it happens a lot, right?

I realment és una cosa bastant bona,

And it really is quite a good thing,

que les fantasies no tenen límit a nivell sexual

that fantasies have no limits at a sexual level

i a nivell de qualsevol tipus,

and at any level,

però les fantasies són una cosa boníssima realment

But fantasies are really a wonderful thing.

per alimentar el teu desig.

to feed your desire.

O sigui, com la gent que té més fantasies té més desig

That is, people who have more fantasies have more desire.

i s'està demostrant que també té una vida sexual més plena

and it is being shown that it also has a more fulfilling sex life

i no hi ha putos límits.

and there are no fucking limits.

Jo, com a sexòloga, he escoltat moltes barbaritats

I, as a sexologist, have heard many outrageous things.

i ja no m'escandalitza res i...

and nothing shocks me anymore and...

Ojo, per mi diu més coses bones que dolentes.

Be careful, for me it says more good things than bad.

M'explica una fantasia estranya.

He tells me a strange fantasy.

Bueno, sé que, evidentment, aquesta fantasia

Well, I know that, obviously, this fantasy

vulneri els drets d'una altra persona.

violate the rights of another person.

Ja, això ja és més que tot.

Yes, this is already more than everything.

Doncs es van conèixer dues persones allà, perdoneu, ja tallo.

So two people met there, sorry, I'll stop now.

No, no, continua, que és interessant.

No, no, continue, it's interesting.

Un noi va posar en un paperet

A boy wrote on a little piece of paper.

m'agradaria fer l'amor en una estació del bici.

I would like to make love in a bike station.

I una noia, posteriorment,

And a girl, later,

en el seu paperet

in his/her little paper

va posar vull que em facin l'amor

she said I want you to make love to me

a sobre d'una bici.

on a bike.

I aquell dia es van conèixer

And that day they met.

i a dia d'avui segueixen quedant.

And to this day, they still remain.

I només follen en bicis.

And they only have sex on bikes.

Només follen en estacions.

They only mate in stations.

I això quin dia de la setmana dius que ho fan?

And which day of the week do you say they do it?

Doncs bé, jo volia comentar també

Well, I also wanted to comment.

una coseta de plats bruts.

a little thing about dirty dishes.

En general?

In general?

No, per tornar a plats bruts.

No, to go back to dirty dishes.

Ah, és veritat.

Ah, it's true.

Una frase que diu el...

A phrase that says the...

el Jordi Sánchez.

Jordi Sánchez.

López?

López?

És que se m'oblida sempre

I always forget it.

el nou personatge.

the new character.

Mira que el diuen a vegades als capítols.

Look what they say sometimes in the chapters.

Li diu el David,

He tells David,

li diu, bueno, tu que ets tan així,

he says to him, well, you who are so like this,

tu que ets tan així.

you who are so like this.

I he pensat, fa molta ràbia això.

I've thought about it, this is really frustrating.

Això fa molta ràbia.

This is very frustrating.

A mi m'ho han dit també a vegades, tu que ets tan així.

I've been told that too sometimes, you who are so much like this.

És que tu ets bastant així.

It's just that you are quite like that.

I vosaltres sou molt així.

And you are very much like that.

I tots som molt així.

And we are all very much like that.

Això no m'ho dius al carrer, fill de puta.

You don't tell me that on the street, son of a bitch.

Pegamos y no pegamos.

We hit and we don't hit.

Llavors, com que tothom és una mica així,

Then, since everyone is a bit like that,

el fet que tinguin tots tan així,

the fact that they all have it like this,

que tinguin tots tan així,

may they all be like this,

fa molta ràbia.

It makes me very angry.

I tu també ets així.

And you are like this too.

Desgraciat.

Unfortunate.

No així com jo, però així com tu sí que ets.

Not like me, but like you, you are.

Inútil.

Useless.

Bueno, no sé, em passa que a vegades

Well, I don’t know, it happens to me that sometimes

em ve la ràbia cap a...

I feel anger towards...

Cap al López.

Towards López.

Cap a problemes de gent que és així.

Towards problems with people who are like this.

Només li passa a la gent que és així, això.

It only happens to people who are like this.

Algú indeterminat.

Someone unspecified.

Ho diu algú indeterminat que tu ets així.

It is said by someone indefinite that you are like this.

És com dir, què tal, anà fent.

It's like saying, how's it going, just getting by.

Que no estàs dient res.

You are not saying anything.

Ni ben imament, anà fent.

Neither well nor poorly, he went on doing.

A vosaltres no us fa ràbia, això?

Doesn't this make you angry?

Que us diguin, bueno, tu que ets tan així.

Let them tell you, well, you who are like that.

O no us ho han dit?

Or haven't they told you?

Potser que m'hagin dit alguna vegada i potser que m'hagin fet ràbia,

Maybe they have told me once and maybe they have made me angry,

recordo cap exemple concret ni res.

I don't remember any specific example or anything.

La veritat és que no em té massa marcat, això.

The truth is that it doesn’t affect me much, this.

A vosaltres tampoc, eh? Sou normals.

Not you either, right? You’re normal.

No som així.

We are not like that.

Sou persones normals.

You are normal people.

No som tan així com tu, no?

We're not quite like you, are we?

Avui cometrem un assassinat, eh?

Today we will commit a murder, right?

Mato tothom amb micros.

I kill everyone with microphones.

Però, en defensa del López, diré que després

But, in López's defense, I will say that afterwards

especifica què vol dir així en aquell context.

specify what it means like that in that context.

Sí, després ho especifica, a més a més,

Yes, it specifies it later, moreover,

molt concretament.

very specifically.

Que diu, que diu?

What does it say, what does it say?

Que no te'n recordes, Anna?

Don't you remember, Anna?

No, són lapsos momentanis.

No, they are momentary lapses.

És que no es perdona res, en aquest podcast.

Nothing is forgiven in this podcast.

Però li diu una ristra de qualitats negatives

But he/she tells him/her a string of negative qualities.

bastant important, sí.

quite important, yes.

No et sé citar ara.

I can't quote you right now.

No ens l'hem apuntat cap de nosaltres.

None of us has taken note of it.

Que no l'heu vist, el capítol?

Haven't you seen the episode?

Home, sí, perquè no estàvem preparats

At home, yes, because we were not prepared.

per aquest moment en concret, desgraciadament.

for this specific moment, unfortunately.

És veritat, això és falta de preparació.

It's true, this is a lack of preparation.

La pròxima vegada portaré un transcrit

Next time I'll bring a transcript.

de tot l'episodi.

of the whole episode.

Si el vols, el llibre de guions

If you want it, the script book.

de Plats Bruts, que només hi ha alguns capítols,

from Plats Bruts, that there are only a few episodes,

aquest hi és.

here it is.

Així que el pots trobar en la biblioteca.

So you can find it in the library.

L'hauríem d'anar a buscar.

We should go pick him/her up.

Jo me'l vaig buscar i me'l vaig llegir,

I sought it out and I read it.

però clar, és a la biblioteca, l'he tornat.

but of course, it's at the library, I've returned it.

No sé si teniu més coses a comentar vosaltres.

I don't know if you have more things to comment on.

Algunes?

Some?

Jo, alguna poqueta, però digues, Pepi.

Me, a little bit, but go ahead, Pepi.

M'agrada el concepte del cactus Tomàs, en general,

I like the concept of the cactus Tomàs, in general.

i tenim un cactus aquí que sempre ens observa

And we have a cactus here that always watches us.

quan gravem aquí dalt,

when we record up here,

i he pensat que li podríem dir Tomàs.

And I thought that we could call him Tomàs.

És un nom maco, sí.

It's a nice name, yes.

Bé, doncs ja tenim el cactus batejat.

Well, then we have the cactus named.

Cactus Tomàs.

Cactus Tomàs.

Jo us volia preguntar, perquè jo recentment

I wanted to ask you, because I recently

he adquirit una planta a casa,

I have acquired a plant at home,

una cosa que jo fins ara havia estat,

one thing that I had been until now,

molt reàcia a tenir,

very reluctant to have,

perquè sóc un assassí de plantes bastant...

because I am quite a plant killer...

Bé, un assassí en sèrie de plantes.

Well, a serial killer of plants.

En Jaume no t'està escoltant,

Jaume is not listening to you.

està escoltant els ocells.

he is listening to the birds.

No, no, estic escoltant...

No, no, I am listening...

Jo tinc una orella als ocells i l'altra al David.

I have one ear to the birds and the other to David.

David, t'estava dient...

David, I was telling you...

I els ocells...

And the birds...

Sóc un assassí de plantes, home, clar.

I'm a plant killer, man, obviously.

Doncs sí, sóc un assassí de plantes

Well yes, I am a plant killer.

i em sap molt de greu,

and I am very sorry,

m'ha sabut molt de greu,

I am very sorry.

però he pensat que aquesta seria com especial.

but I thought this would be kind of special.

Quin tipus de planta és?

What type of plant is it?

Un potos.

A pothos.

El potos ho aguanta tot, eh?

The pothos can handle everything, right?

És impossible matar un potos.

It is impossible to kill a pothos.

És una llengua de suegra, no sé com es diu en català.

It's a mother-in-law's language, I don't know how it's said in Catalan.

Ah, sí, sí, sí.

Ah, yes, yes, yes.

Una llengua de suegra.

A mother-in-law's tongue.

Una llengua de sogra.

A mother-in-law's tongue.

Doncs una llengua de sogra.

Well, a mother-in-law's language.

I l'he posat a l'habitació,

And I've put it in the room,

perquè és una de les poques plantes

because it is one of the few plants

que emet oxigen per la nit,

that emits oxygen at night,

que canvia com el cicle,

that changes like the cycle,

i l'he posat nom per encadenyar-me més,

and I have given it a name to bind myself more,

per cuidar-la més.

to take better care of her.

Ah, i pensava que volies que el triéssim en consens,

Ah, I thought you wanted us to choose him by consensus.

em feia molta il·lusió.

It thrilled me a lot.

Com es diu?

What's your name?

Es diu Truqui.

His name is Truqui.

Truqui?

Did you call?

Truqui.

Call me.

Sí, perquè vaig llegir que t'ajudava a dormir,

Yes, because I read that it helped you sleep,

la planta,

the plant,

i l'he posat a l'habitació

And I have put it in the room.

i he pensat que aquest serà el meu truquet per dormir.

I thought that this will be my little trick to sleep.

Ah, punyetero.

Ah, bastard.

I ara posaré mi truquito.

And now I will put on my little trick.

I per què no el mendruquito?

And why not the little beggar?

O Vladimir.

Oh Vladimir.

Perquè crec que...

Because I believe that...

L'altre Truqui per dormir.

The other one is a trick to sleep.

Mira que com tingui punxes ho tens posat, eh?

Look, as long as it has spikes, you have it set, right?

El Vladimir ja el tinc.

I already have Vladimir.

Ja dorm amb tu.

She is already sleeping with you.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

I no m'ha funcionat.

It hasn't worked for me.

Ja, no, arriba un punt que t'immunitzes.

Yes, no, there comes a point where you become immune.

He de fer un gangbang de Vladimir per aquest pas.

I have to do a gangbang of Vladimir at this rate.

Un efecte.

An effect.

Has de fer com els mariners,

You have to do like the sailors,

allò que diuen que se seien a sobre de les mans.

what they say that they sit on their hands.

Ah, per adormir-les.

Ah, to put them to sleep.

Per adormir-les,

To lull them to sleep,

semblava com que l'hi estiguessis fent a una altra persona.

It seemed like you were doing it to someone else.

Ah, per mi ja m'ho sembla.

Ah, it seems so to me already.

Jo estic tan dissociat que ja sembla que l'hi estiguessis fent a una altra persona.

I am so dissociated that it now seems like you are doing it to another person.

Doncs el potos, David, és miraculós.

Well, the pothos, David, is miraculous.

Jo tinc un potos que aquest estiu no l'he regat,

I have a pothos that I haven't watered this summer,

que vaig tenir un accident de cotxe per culpa del potos

that I had a car accident because of the potholes

i no el vaig poder salvar de...

and I couldn't save him from...

Jo el portava de copilot, però no li vaig posar el cinturó, mala idea,

I was driving him as a co-pilot, but I didn't buckle him in, bad idea.

i a la primera curva allò es va tirar

and at the first turn it ran off.

i vaig anar a apartar-me per intentar protegir-lo,

I went to step aside to try to protect him,

no vaig poder protegir-lo i em vaig estampar contra un cotxe aparcat.

I couldn't protect him and I crashed into a parked car.

Sí, sí, ma mare diu que és la planta més cara que hem tingut mai,

Yes, yes, my mother says it's the most expensive plant we have ever had.

perquè la reparació del puto cotxe va costar més que...

because the damn car repair cost more than...

La cosa és que...

The thing is that...

La cosa és que aquell potos han passat com 4 o 5 anys i allà segueix, eh?

The thing is that those potholes have been there for about 4 or 5 years and they're still there, you know?

I no té nom, no li heu posat nom?

And it has no name, haven't you given it a name?

Li vaig dir Júlia un temps, però crec que té més cara de Sílvia.

I called her Júlia for a while, but I think she looks more like Sílvia.

Però no, no sé, tampoc m'acaba d'agradar, ni Sílvia ni Júlia, ai, no sé...

But no, I don't know, I also don't really like either Sílvia or Júlia, oh, I don't know...

Podem fer votació?

Can we hold a vote?

Vinga, sí, posem-li nom al meu potos.

Come on, yes, let's name my pothos.

Va.

Go.

Jo dic Fernanda.

I say Fernanda.

Fernanda.

Fernanda.

Ah, jo pensava que votàvem entre Júlia i Sílvia.

Oh, I thought we were voting between Júlia and Sílvia.

Ah.

Ah.

No, no, no, cap dels dos, no, no, descartem-los.

No, no, no, neither of them, no, no, let's dismiss them.

Fem propostes.

Let's make proposals.

Vale, això, la proposta de l'Anna és Fernanda...

Okay, this, Anna's proposal is Fernanda...

Betty?

Betty?

És que a mi m'agraden els noms que rimen, saps?

It's just that I like names that rhyme, you know?

Amb la que es digués en pla...

With what was said plainly...

Lotus? No, Lotus amb potos...

Lotus? No, Lotus with photos...

No, però perquè acabi amb moletilla, per exemple.

No, but to end with a filler, for example.

Si es digués Carlotus el potos, saps?

If it were called Carlotus the potos, you know?

Carlotus el potos, no està mal.

Carlotus the pothos, it's not bad.

Carlotus.

Carlotus.

Per Hocus.

For Hocus.

Hocus?

Hocus?

Hocus potos.

Hocus pocus.

Hocus potos?

Hocus pocus?

Això sembla un conjunt de Harry Potter.

This looks like a Harry Potter set.

Aquí està la gràcia, aquí està la gràcia, eh?

Here is the grace, here is the grace, right?

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Es pot dir Pipis, tipus Pipis potos.

It can be said Pipis, type Pipis pots.

Saps? Amb la de pixar, putar, amb coses que surten del cos...

You know? With the peeing, fucking, with things that come out of the body...

Jo si vols un joc de paraules, potos és l'acrònim de President of the United States.

If you want a play on words, potos is the acronym for President of the United States.

Amb Lincoln, però...

With Lincoln, but...

Sí, el que més t'agradi, l'hi pots lliure a man, l'hi pots lliure a...

Yes, whatever you like, you can give it to him freely, you can give it to...

Home, si es va fotre una hòstia l'hi pots dir Joe Biden i ja està.

Man, if he hit himself, you can tell Joe Biden and that's it.

Humor polític.

Political humor.

Se la va fotre bastant abans del Joe Biden.

She got quite messed up before Joe Biden.

Com que va ser un accident de cotxe l'hi podríem dir Kennedy, però tampoc.

Since it was a car accident we could call it Kennedy, but not really.

Uau.

Wow.

Ja està, està molt bé Kennedy.

That's it, Kennedy is very good.

Carrero blanco, eh?

White Courier, huh?

No, no, però el Kennedy cau millor.

No, no, but Kennedy comes across better.

Vinga, es dirà Kennedy.

Come on, it will be called Kennedy.

I tant que va caure.

And so it fell.

D'acord, doncs...

Okay, then...

Algú més li vol posar nom a alguna planta?

Does anyone else want to name a plant?

Jo he de dir que tinc molts potos perquè és l'única planta que no s'ha mort.

I have to say that I have many succulents because it's the only plant that hasn't died.

Veus?

Do you see?

I llavors li podria posar nom a quatre potos.

And then I could name four photos.

Quatre potos.

Four pots.

O sigui, us dic...

So, I’m telling you...

A quatre potos.

To four photos.

Una es diu a perrito, l'altra es diu...

One is called puppy, the other is called...

Estem sortits avui, eh? Estàs molt sortit.

We're going out today, right? You're very outgoing.

Estem que en sortim.

We are leaving.

És la idea de tenir nòvia d'Emili o nòvia d'Emili.

It is the idea of having Emili's girlfriend or Emili's girlfriend.

Escolta, i posar-li els potos com els altres integrants del poto...

Listen, and put the pots like the other members of the pot...

I posar-li els potos com els altres integrants del poto...

And to put the pictures like the other members of the group...

Posar-li els potos com els altres integrants del podcast...

Put the photos up like the other members of the podcast...

Ah, d'acord, està bé, està en quadra.

Ah, okay, it’s fine, it’s all in order.

Dos potos David, un poto Jaume i un poto Anna.

Two pots David, one pot Jaume, and one pot Anna.

D'acord.

Okay.

Maco.

Cute.

Ens tens a casa com...

You have us at home like...

Poto Anna.

Poto Anna.

Però un que es digui puto, tipus puto potos.

But one that is called puto, like puto potos.

Puto potos és maco també.

"That fucking pot is nice too."

Puto potos.

Fucking photos.

És que les meves plantes no tenen vida.

It's just that my plants have no life.

A casa tot és plàstic.

At home, everything is plastic.

Jo he abandonat aquesta partida de poder mantenir una planta

I have abandoned this game of maintaining a plant.

i jo ja he acceptat que no soc capaç.

And I have already accepted that I am not capable.

Jo tinc una norma, que no està malament, que és...

I have a rule, which isn't bad, which is...

Les plantes que pengen del sol...

The plants that hang from the sun...

Són de plàstic, perquè fa pal regar-les i perquè és una moguda.

They are plastic because it's a hassle to water them and because it's a hassle.

I les que estan al terra són de veritat,

And those that are on the ground are real,

perquè aquestes sí que es noten que són de plàstic.

because these do feel like they are made of plastic.

Doncs si algun dia veniu a casa veureu que aquesta norma no es regeix.

Well, if you ever come to my house, you'll see that this rule is not followed.

Tot és de plàstic.

Everything is plastic.

Exacte.

Exact.

Se'ls pot posar nom igualment, però tot i que siguin de plàstic.

They can be named the same, even though they are made of plastic.

Plàstic potos.

Plastic pothos.

Potos plàstic.

Plastic pots.

Polipropipotos?

Polypropylene?

No, és igual.

No, it's fine.

Bòtox.

Botox.

Bòtox és maco.

Botox is beautiful.

Bòtox.

Botox.

Tenia un altre joc de paraules apuntat.

I had another pun written down.

A veure, què és?

Let's see, what is it?

Un tàper?

A Tupperware?

Necessitaré, perquè és molt dolent, llavors necessitaré que després...

I will need, because it is very bad, then I will need that later...

Això està per veure.

This remains to be seen.

Necessitaré que després de fer-lo aplaudiu.

I will need you to applaud after doing it.

A veure.

Let's see.

Hòstia, no l'havia enganxat.

Damn, I hadn't caught him.

No l'ha enganxat ningú, l'ha enganxat ara tothom a casa.

No one has stuck it to him, now everyone has stuck it at home.

Està per veure.

It's yet to be seen.

Uf.

Phew.

Oh, Déu meu.

Oh, my God.

M'he desinflat.

I have deflated.

Seguim.

Let's continue.

Digues.

Tell me.

No sé si tinc ganes de dir-lo.

I don't know if I feel like saying it.

Va, va, va.

Come on, come on, come on.

Hi ha un moment en què el Ramon ja s'ha instal·lat a casa de...

There is a moment when Ramon has already settled in at...

Això és més endavant, però ja avanço temes.

This will be later, but I am already bringing up topics.

No, ja, si portem no sé quanta estona.

No, already, we've been here for I don't know how long.

Més val que avancem.

We better move on.

Vale, vale.

Okay, okay.

Doncs és a casa del...

Well, it's at the house of...

Bueno, del David i del López.

Well, from David and López.

I s'ha fet un superesmorzar i té una magdalena gegantina

He has made a super breakfast and has a giant muffin.

que diu que és la mare de totes les magdalenes.

that says it is the mother of all muffins.

I jo he pensat...

And I've thought...

La magdalena!

The muffin!

Oh, oh, oh!

Oh, oh, oh!

Llavors, aplaudiments, sisplau.

Then, applause, please.

Això queda millor quan ja ha publicat.

This looks better once it has been published.

I si la teva mare es diu Helena, què tal?

And if your mother is named Helena, how are you?

També es diu...

It is also called...

La mare Helena.

Mother Helena.

La Helena Magdalena.

Helena Magdalena.

Com es deia la teva mare?

What was your mother's name?

No, Montserrat.

No, Montserrat.

Però no li deies mare no sé què.

But you didn't say mother I don't know what.

No, no, això ho vam dir...

No, no, we said this...

Vam parlar d'uns cosins d'una oient del podcast

We talked about some cousins of a listener of the podcast.

i amiga meva, l'Èlia Romaní,

and my friend, Èlia Romaní,

que els seus cosins li diuen a sa mare Alemany.

that his cousins call his mother German.

Li diuen pel cognom.

They call him by his surname.

I llavors vam parlar que es digués...

And then we talked about it being called...

No sé com t'ho dius.

I don't know how you say it.

Santelles.

Saints.

Això, mare Santelles.

This, Mother Santelles.

Sí, mare Santelles.

Yes, Mother Santelles.

Pare Maganya.

Father Maganya.

Pare Maganya, sisplau.

Father Maganya, please.

Semblo un mossèn.

I look like a priest.

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

El pare Maganya.

The father Maganya.

Has de dir el cognom i prou,

You just need to say the surname, that's all.

perquè si poses mare o pare darrere

because if you put mother or father behind

sembla que parlis del cognom.

It seems like you're talking about the surname.

Clar, gat.

Sure, cat.

L'altre dia parlava amb un amic que és metge

The other day I was talking with a friend who is a doctor.

i es diu de cognom Calvo.

and his last name is Calvo.

Llavors diu que una de les seves grans pors

Then he says that one of his biggest fears

és fer-se calb.

it's going bald.

I llavors diu que presentar-se com a doctor Calvo

And then he says to introduce himself as Doctor Calvo.

i que arribi una persona calba

and let a bald person arrive

diu que això no ho podria suportar.

he says he couldn't stand this.

Sabeu com es diu la meva metgessa de capçalera?

Do you know what my primary care physician's name is?

Com?

How?

Doctora hospital.

Doctor's hospital.

No.

No.

Sí.

Yes.

No.

No.

Això és d'un efecte picvaliót,

This is a picvaliót effect,

que sóc a l'agotia de dir-se així.

that I am in the agony of saying it this way.

Segur que la medicina precisament per això.

Surely the medicine for that reason.

No ens enganya.

He doesn't deceive us.

O sigui,

So,

la seva família són metges.

His family are doctors.

Doncs ja està.

Well, that's it.

No ho sé, pregunto, pregunto.

I don't know, I ask, I ask.

Ho vam fer expressament.

We did it on purpose.

Però qui es diu hospital de cognom?

But who has Hospital as a surname?

La doctora hospital.

The hospital doctor.

Sí.

Yes.

La gent, eh?

People, huh?

Jo conec gent que es diu hospital.

I know people who are called hospital.

Ja està,

That's it,

ja prou de tenir fills amb el cognom hospital.

Enough of having children with the surname Hospital.

No a la procreació.

No to procreation.

Carai,

Wow,

tingueu una mica de responsabilitat

have a little responsibility

amb el vostre cognom.

with your surname.

Si no voleu que segueixi,

If you don't want me to continue,

dir-te hospital

tell you hospital

et condiciona la vida, eh?

It conditions your life, huh?

Clar.

Sure.

Bueno,

Well,

i poc se'n parla dels noms que posaven abans, eh?

And not much is said about the names they used to give, right?

O sigui,

That is,

en quin moment tu estàs parint

at what moment are you giving birth

i li dius a la teva filla

and you tell your daughter

Dolores?

Dolores?

Doncs...

Well...

Aviam,

Let's see,

des del punt de vista de la mare

from the mother's point of view

ho entenc, eh?

I understand, right?

Sí, sí, sí, totalment.

Yes, yes, yes, absolutely.

Total.

Total.

A mi em van dir Lola,

They called me Lola.

però vam veure que Dolores era tan lleig

but we saw that Dolores was so ugly

que van dir,

what they said,

bueno, doncs mira,

well, then look,

és que és lleig, eh?

It's just that it's ugly, huh?

Si et pares a pensar,

If you stop to think,

és com que ho hem normalitzat,

it's like we've normalized it,

però són noms que diuen malament.

but they are names that are pronounced poorly.

Però en realitat

But in reality

tots els noms volen dir alguna cosa.

All names mean something.

Angústies.

Anxieties.

O sigui,

That is,

què esperes a la vida de la teva filla

What do you hope for your daughter's life?

posant-li aquest nom?

giving it this name?

M'agradaria d'aquí uns anys

I would like in a few years.

gent nascuda

born people

a la generació nostra

to our generation

que es digui

that it be said

depressió.

depression.

Ansiedat.

Anxiety.

Però imagina't-ho en anglès.

But imagine it in English.

En plan,

In plan,

Dolores és pains.

Dolores is pains.

Pains.

Pains.

Bueno.

Good.

Pains.

Pains.

Anxiosness.

Anxiety.

Sí, no?

Yes, no?

Ovario poliquístico.

Polycystic ovary.

Hola, ovario poliquístico.

Hello, polycystic ovary.

Totes aquestes coses

All these things

de malalties

of diseases

també han anat-li

they have also gone to him/her

a punt d'anar-hi.

about to go there.

Ella ha llegit avui

She has read today.

com una periodista als Estats Units

as a journalist in the United States

per intentar

to try

tantejar

to weigh up

aquest sistema aquest

this system this

de ficar noms

to put names

i la regulació i tal.

and the regulation and such.

Li ha dit al Sofí

He has told Sofí.

metamfetamin rules.

methamphetamine rules.

I li hem deixat fer-ho.

And we have let him do it.

Li hem deixat fer-ho.

We let him do it.

Saps que aquí està prohibit?

Do you know that it is prohibited here?

Aquí està prohibidíssim

Here it is strictly forbidden.

posar depèn de quins noms.

put depends on which names.

Doncs allà es veu que també

Well, it seems that there too.

però aquests acolats.

but these allies.

He de dir que

I have to say that

estic una mica a favor

I am a little in favor.

de prohibir

to prohibit

segons quins noms.

according to which names.

Noms que no es puguin pronunciar

Names that cannot be pronounced

com el fill de l'Elon Musk.

like Elon Musk's son.

Com Voldemort?

Like Voldemort?

L'Elon Musk.

The Elon Musk.

El fill de l'Elon Musk

The son of Elon Musk

era l'R2-D2, no?

It was R2-D2, wasn't it?

Sí, era una cosa així.

Yes, it was something like that.

Exacte.

Exactly.

Aquest estiu he vist

This summer I have seen.

dues vegades l'Starling

twice the Starling

a tot això.

to all this.

L'Starling?

The Starling?

L'Starsky?

The Starsky?

No.

No.

Ah, allò que va posar

Ah, that which he/she put.

el de llonces volant.

the of flying fireflies.

No, no ho he vist.

No, I haven't seen it.

Starlight Festival.

Starlight Festival.

No.

No.

No, el de llonces.

No, the one from Llonces.

El de llonces.

The one of llonces.

L'Elon Musk va fotre

Elon Musk messed up.

unes llumetes.

some little lights.

No, calla.

No, shut up.

Jo un dia ho vaig veure al poble

One day I saw him in the village.

i vaig dir

I said

què conya és això?

What the hell is this?

Cuida-ho.

Take care of it.

Hi havia com una cosa

There was like a thing.

molt randa amb el cel, no?

very cloudy with the sky, right?

No era un ovni.

It wasn't a UFO.

Hòstia.

Holy shit.

Era l'Elon Musk.

It was Elon Musk.

Puto Elon.

Fucking Elon.

Aquest és el resum.

This is the summary.

Doncs jo no m'he adonat.

Well, I didn't realize.

Algú té alguna cosa més a dir

Does anyone have anything else to say?

de Tinc Destí?

Do I have a destiny?

Sí.

Yes.

Endavant, doncs.

Go ahead, then.

I tant, m'ha agradat molt

Absolutely, I've liked it very much.

el moment meta del Pol

the meta moment of Pol

que ha tingut

that has had

que tothom estava esperant

that everyone was waiting for

que digués la seva frase

that she would say her sentence

per tercera vegada

for the third time

perquè l'estaven esperant

because they were waiting for him/her

s'havia complert un patró

a pattern had been fulfilled

i s'havia fet dos vegades

and it had been done twice

i s'estaven esperant

and they were waiting

a veure si diu

let's see if it says

la seva frase dels mugrons

her phrase about the nipples

i el moment que se n'adona

and the moment he realizes it

de, ah, és veritat,

oh, it's true,

he de dir-ho això,

I have to tell you this,

m'ha fet gràcia

It made me laugh.

perquè em vau dir

because you told me

que es repetien

that were repeated

els moments així.

the moments like this.

Sí, de tant en tant

Yes, now and then.

hi ha un toc meta

there is a meta touch

o potser no és tant un toc

or maybe it's not so much a touch

però ja ho veurem, això.

but we'll see about that.

Perdó.

Sorry.

Llavors, m'ha agradat molt

So, I liked it a lot.

però no ha arribat a estar

but has not managed to be

el meu moment preferit

my favorite moment

que si voleu anar

that if you want to go

en aquest moment

at this moment

l'Anna crec que té

Anna, I think she has.

un moment preferit

a favorite moment

a...

a...

Anna, Anna, si us plau,

Anna, Anna, please,

comença tu.

You start.

El té encallat el nas

The tea stuck in the nose.

i està a punt de sortir-li.

and it is about to come out.

Però si vols la començo jo.

But if you want, I'll start it.

És veritat que has vist

Is it true that you have seen?

el capítol dos cops?

the chapter two times?

O tres?

Or three?

Que t'ha agradat tant

What did you like so much?

que no podies parar de veure'l?

that you couldn't stop watching it?

Bueno, a veure,

Well, let's see,

per aclarir-ho ja.

to make it clear now.

He entrat en bucle.

I've entered a loop.

No podia parar.

I couldn't stop.

És que he de parar

I have to stop.

en algun moment.

at some point.

No tinc tantes hores

I don't have that many hours.

del dia com per veure'm

of the day as to see me

aquest capítol

this chapter

tantes vegades.

so many times.

Tinc destí, tinc destí,

I have destiny, I have destiny,

tinc destí.

I have a destination.

El meu destí

My destiny

és veure't

it's seeing you

i tenir destí.

and have destiny.

Bé, que destí.

Well, what destiny.

Bé, per això,

Well, for that reason,

us ho deixo a vosaltres.

I'll leave it to you.

L'Anna no s'ha vist

Anna hasn't been seen.

el capítol.

the chapter.

No sé de qui parla.

I don't know who he/she is talking about.

De mi no és.

It's not mine.

No s'ha vist el capítol avui

The episode has not been seen today.

i ha vingut.

and he/she has come.

Emoció enganyada.

Deceived emotion.

Impresentable.

Unpresentable.

Es diu el pecat

It is called the sin.

però no es diu el pecador.

but the sinner is not named.

Exacte.

Exactly.

No s'ha vist el capítol.

The episode has not been seen.

Un dia podríem jugar a l'infiltrat

One day we could play the infiltrator.

que algú no s'hagi vist

that someone hasn't seen themselves

el capítol

the chapter

i que després l'audiència

and that afterwards the audience

hagi de decidir

I have to decide.

qui no serà mirat.

who will not be looked at.

Vale, jo tinc una idea.

Okay, I have an idea.

Podem jugar al pròxim capítol.

We can play in the next chapter.

A veure qui és, eh?

Let's see who it is, huh?

A veure si ho pilles.

Let's see if you get it.

M'importa.

I care.

Vinga, va, al pròxim juguem.

Come on, let's play in the next one.

Fantàstic.

Fantastic.

Molt bé.

Very good.

El capítol de l'infiltrat.

The chapter of the infiltrator.

Moments favorits, doncs.

Favorite moments, then.

Votacions.

Voting.

Qui serà l'infiltrat?

Who will be the infiltrator?

A veure,

Let's see,

el meu moment preferit

my favorite moment

ha estat quan

it has been when

està parlant el Ramon

Ramon is speaking.

amb el López

with López

d'això d'intentar buscar pis

about trying to find an apartment

i tal,

and so on,

i diu,

and he/she says,

bueno, potser algun amic

well, maybe some friend

i el López li diu

and López tells him

fins i tot ha penat

even he has suffered

però on trobaràs tu un amic?

but where will you find a friend?

Hosti, m'ha passat per alt

Damn, I overlooked it.

a mi aquesta frase.

I like this phrase.

A mi m'ha agradat,

I liked it.

a mi m'ha agradat.

I liked it.

M'ha agradat molt

I liked it very much.

tant el moment

both the moment

com la interpretació,

with the interpretation,

com tot

as with everything

i s'ha compartit

and has been shared

en el meu moment preferit

in my favorite moment

del capítol.

of the chapter.

Ah, molt bé.

Ah, very good.

M'estàs mirant

You are looking at me.

perquè ho digui jo?

So I can say it?

Sí, si vols.

Yes, if you want.

A veure,

Let's see,

hi ha hagut un moment

there has been a moment

que he pensat,

that I have thought,

o sigui,

that is,

que no m'ha fet molta gràcia

that hasn't amused me much

però he pensat

but I have thought

que podia ser jo perfectament,

that could perfectly be me,

que era bàsicament

that was basically

quan la Emma parla de,

when Emma talks about,

no sé què,

I don't know what,

li van donar 40 trets

he was shot 40 times

o no sé què,

or I don't know what,

bueno, 40 no,

well, not 40,

però potser 10 sí, no?

but maybe 10 yes, right?

100% jo explico en històries

100% I explain in stories.

perquè sempre endulcro tot molt

because I always sweeten everything a lot

perquè sembli més divertit

to make it seem more fun

i no ho ha sigut

and it hasn't been.

o potser sí,

or maybe yes,

no sé,

I don't know,

per delencant,

for the sake of clarity,

ja està,

it's done,

no és preferit

it is not preferred

però què tal

but how about

que el Ramon sigui putero,

that Ramon is a pimp,

no?

no?

En plan,

In a way,

això de llogar

this renting

unes senyoretes,

young ladies,

llogar,

to rent,

o sigui,

that is,

com purament

as purely

si fossin objectes,

if they were objects,

estava clar

it was clear

que el Ramon era putero

that Ramon was a pimp

perquè ja marca

because it already marks

tot el que odiem

everything we hate

en els homes i tal

in men and such

i tot el que odio

and everything I hate

en general,

in general,

sí,

yes,

i això és el que fa

and this is what it does

un personatge

a character

una mica entranyable,

a bit endearing,

és com el Michael Scott

it's like Michael Scott

de The Office,

from The Office,

no?

no?

Potser una mica,

Maybe a little,

que ho intenta

that he/she tries it

però no pot,

but he/she cannot,

bueno,

well,

crec que el Michael Scott

I think that Michael Scott.

ho intenta més

he tries harder

que el Ramon,

that Ramon,

potser sí.

maybe yes.

No he vist The Office,

I haven't seen The Office.

una mica sí.

a little bit yes.

Tampoc he vist aquest capítol.

I haven't seen this episode either.

Ja ens ha quedat clar,

It has become clear to us now.

Anna,

Anna,

no presumeixis tant.

don't be so cocky.

No he vist-ho,

I haven't seen it.

nada.

nothing.

Doncs,

Well,

mira,

look,

jo estava esperant

I was waiting.

que parlessis tu,

that you spoke,

Betty,

Betty,

perquè tenia com dos moments,

because it had like two moments,

dic,

I say,

si em diu un dels dos,

if you tell me one of the two,

diré l'altre,

I'll say the other one,

però com que no d'això

but since it's not about that

i l'Anna es nega a dir

and Anna refuses to say

el seu moment favorit,

his/her favorite moment,

doncs mira,

well, look,

diré tots dos.

I will say both.

vull que la gent

I want people

opini per si sou,

you think for yourselves,

vull llibertat d'expressió.

I want freedom of expression.

Un joc,

A game,

quin ha estat

what has been

el moment preferit de l'Anna?

Anna's favorite moment?

Ah,

Ah,

contesteu-ho.

answer it.

A totes les anteriors.

To all of the above.

En el Ramon,

In Ramon,

a mi em fa gràcia

I find it funny.

la frase aquesta que diu

this phrase that says

de jo el que volia

of me what I wanted

era passar

was to pass

aquests quatre dies aquí,

these four days here,

com si compartís pis

as if I shared a flat

com tu i el David

like you and David

i fer festes

and have parties

i fer coses

and do things

i fer sexes.

and make sexes.

L'expressió

The expression

fer sexes

make sexes

em fa gràcia.

It amuses me.

I també és

And it is also

aquesta

this

aquesta doble

this double

doble efecte del Ramon,

double effect of Ramon,

no?

no?

Fa fàstic

It's disgusting.

i a la vegada

and at the same time

fa peneta,

it's a shame,

no?

no?

Dius,

You say,

hòstia,

wow,

pobre paio.

poor guy.

I després el diàleg

And then the dialogue.

de quan

since when

quan el David

when David

li diu a l'Emma

he tells Emma

vols ser la meva nòvia

Do you want to be my girlfriend?

d'Emili,

of Emili,

no sé què,

I don't know what,

i l'Emma respon

and Emma responds

no, no sé,

no, I don't know,

m'hauria de pensar

I should think about it.

i el David diu

and David says

bueno,

well,

pensa tu,

think you,

encara tinc cinc minuts.

I still have five minutes.

Això m'ha fet gràcia també.

This has also amused me.

I després

And then

quan s'abracen

when they hug

ho trobo molt tonto

I find it very silly.

i molt,

and a lot,

molt,

very,

és com molt naïf,

it's quite naive,

no?

no?

Es fan un piquito

They give each other a peck.

però super.

but super.

M'ha fet gràcia

It made me laugh.

lo escèptic

the skeptic

que és

what is it

tot el tema

the whole topic

de ser nòvios,

to be a couple,

parets,

walls,

no?

no?

De ser nòvios

Being a couple

totalment escèpticament,

totally skeptically,

d'escolta,

listen,

acordem ara i aquí

let's agree now and here

que som nòvios,

that we are boyfriend and girlfriend,

ho segellem

we seal it

amb aquest piquito

with this little beak

i a partir d'ara

and from now on

serem nòvios

we will be boyfriends

i ens escriurem cartetes.

And we will write each other letters.

És que,

It is that,

en què consisteix

what it consists of

si no ser nòvio?

if not being a boyfriend?

Exacte.

Exactly.

Et fas un piquito

You give yourself a little kiss.

i una abraçada

and a hug

però tampoc,

but neither,

no ens passem.

we're not crossing the line.

No ens passem,

We don't go too far.

no ens passem.

we are not crossing the line.

Ens abracem una miqueta,

We hug a little.

ens recolzem

we support each other

i quan tu necessitis

and when you need

algú que vingui

someone to come

a buscar-te a l'estació

to pick you up at the station

ja hi seré.

I'll be there.

Sempre tindràs

You will always have

el teu potos.

your potos.

No demanar més,

No asking for more,

exacte,

exactly,

sí, sí,

yes, yes,

no demanar més.

do not ask for more.

Quantes vegades

How many times

penseu que,

do you think that,

o sigui,

that is,

amb el que portem

with what we have brought

de podcast,

of the podcast,

quantes vegades

how many times

s'han liat

they got involved

al David i l'Emma?

to David and Emma?

Tres, no?

Three, right?

Tres?

Three?

Com que tres?

How come three?

Dos o tres.

Two or three.

És com que sembla

It's as it seems.

que no es lien mai,

that they never get tangled up,

no?

no?

Quan penses en podcast

When you think about podcasts

però realment

but really

unes quantes, eh?

a few, eh?

Sí?

Yes?

S'han liat ja

They have already gotten involved.

en algun capítol

in some chapter

que haguem vist?

What have we seen?

S'han liat?

Have they hooked up?

Ai, ara no ho sé,

Oh, now I don’t know,

ara no sé si estic pensant

now I don’t know if I am thinking

en els que he vist,

in the ones I have seen,

els que no he vist.

those I haven't seen.

Clar, jo ara m'estic liant

Sure, I'm getting confused now.

també.

also.

Clar, clar, clar.

Clear, clear, clear.

Jo crec que

I believe that

dels que hem vist fins ara

of those we have seen so far

hi ha el

there is the

tinc por

I am afraid.

aquell trio o no trio

that trio or not trio

i ja està.

And that's it.

De moment,

For the moment,

crec que és això.

I think that's it.

El dels matalassos

The one with the mattresses.

doncs seguirem

then we will continue

el patró del David

the patron of David

i em sembla que

and it seems to me that

de moment

for the moment

ja veurem

we'll see

potser, potser

maybe, maybe

es tornen a fer

they are being done again

algun pató

some duck

algun dia.

someday.

Qui sap?

Who knows?

Qui lo fa?

Who does it?

D'acord,

Agreed,

voleu posar nota

Do you want to give a grade?

del capítol?

of the chapter?

Ostres, no me l'he pensat.

Wow, I haven't thought about it.

Doncs pensa-te-la

Well, think about it.

ara mateix.

right now.

Jo ja la tinc.

I already have it.

Vinga, digues.

Come on, say it.

T'ho has pensat bé,

Have you thought it through well?

tu, no?

you, right?

Després de meditar

After meditating

durant tot el dia

throughout the whole day

veient el capítol

watching the episode

en bucle.

in a loop.

Ha demanat

He has asked.

fes-te la feina

do your work

per veure's el capítol.

to see the chapter.

Exacte.

Exactly.

Jo trobo que

I find that

pel meu gust

to my taste

fluixet.

slightly weak.

Fluixet?

Weakling?

Trobo que un 6,5.

I think it's a 6.5.

6,5.

6.5.

Sí.

Yes.

Clar, jo estic fent

Sure, I am doing.

una comparació

a comparison

de tota la sèrie

of the whole series

en general.

in general.

Llavors,

Then,

hi ha de molt més forts

there are much stronger ones

i molt millors

and much better

que s'havien...

that they had...

S'havien encosites.

They had become contemptuous.

A mi m'està començant

I'm starting to feel it.

a passar el mateix

to go through the same

perquè

because

vaig

I go.

bé,

well,

vaig molt més avançat

I am much further ahead.

del que anem amb el podcast

what we are doing with the podcast

amb la meva revisió

with my review

de la sèrie.

of the series.

Ja estic

I'm ready.

gairebé per l'última temporada

almost for the last season

i realment

and really

la primera

the first

és fluixeta.

It's a bit weak.

Vull dir,

I mean,

després la sèrie

after the series

millora bastant,

improves quite a bit,

em sap greu, David,

I'm sorry, David,

ja hi arribarem

We'll get there.

l'any de la picor.

the year of the itch.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Trobo que estructuralment

I find that structurally

no ho van fer gaire bé

they didn't do it very well

en aquest sentit.

in this sense.

Sí, aquest capítol

Yes, this chapter.

en concret

specifically

és una mica anticlimàtic.

it's a bit anticlimactic.

Exacte.

Exactly.

Desenganxa

Unstick

de la sèrie.

of the series.

Pot ser.

It could be.

No, aviam,

No, let's see,

però això passa molt sovint.

but this happens very often.

Si ets un nou

If you are a new one

com es diu,

how do you say,

espectador de la sèrie,

viewer of the series,

no és un dels capítols

it is not one of the chapters

que et faci

that it makes you

quedar-te enganxat a ella.

getting stuck on her.

No, de fet,

No, in fact,

no ens el va recomanar ningú

nobody recommended it to us

quan ho vam preguntar

when we asked it

per Instagram.

for Instagram.

Ja ens podeu seguir

You can now follow us.

si no ho feu

if you don't do it

a arroba

a @

tinc

I have

barra baixa

underscore

podcast

podcast

a Instagram.

to Instagram.

Bàsicament Instagram.

Basically Instagram.

Tenim més xarxes,

We have more networks,

però ningú se'n recorda.

but no one remembers.

I tampoc ningú

I neither anyone.

les fa servir.

she uses them.

Llavors,

Then,

i podeu enviar-nos

and you can send us

un missatge

a message

a tincpodcast

I have a podcast.

arroba gmail.com

gmail.com

que això ho dèiem

that this is what we said

als primers capítols

in the first chapters

i ens arribaven missatges

and we received messages

i feia gràcia,

and it was funny,

però com que ja no ho diem,

but since we don't say it anymore,

doncs no n'arriben més.

so no more arrive.

I, home, no,

I, man, no,

no deixeu

do not leave

de dir-nos coses.

of telling us things.

I ara acceptem cartes.

And now we accept letters.

Sí, també.

Yes, also.

Ja us he donat la direcció.

I have already given you the address.

La torno a donar.

I give it back to her.

Si algú vol donar

If someone wants to give

la seva direcció,

their address,

potser Valls queda lluny, no?

Maybe Valls is far away, right?

Home, però, però, però...

Home, but, but, but...

Els cartes no arriben fins allà.

The letters don't reach there.

Sí, collons.

Yes, damn it.

No, home, no.

No, come on, no.

Que van amb bici, home.

They ride a bike, man.

Que van asfaltar la carretera

They paved the road.

i tot l'altre dia.

and the other day.

Després jo donaré

Then I will give.

el meu mòbil.

my mobile.

Què carai?

What the heck?

Ja ho has fet.

You've already done it.

Ja ho has fet un cop

You've done it once already.

i què?

and what?

Ja ho torno a donar.

I give it back again.

No m'ha enviat ningú res.

No one has sent me anything.

6-26-45-30...

6-26-45-30...

No, no.

No, no.

No, 48...

No, 48...

Sí, no vols dir ni el mòbil.

Yes, you don't even want to say the mobile phone.

6-26-48-35-59.

6-26-48-35-59.

El telèfon de l'esperança.

The phone of hope.

Per si algú tenia dubtes,

In case anyone had doubts,

és un més 34.

it's one more 34.

Si tens alguna cosa

If you have something

que t'inquieta,

what worries you,

li pots parlar al David.

You can talk to David.

Envieu-me.

Send me.

Tinc un consultori

I have a clinic.

del Tinc Podcast.

from the Tinc Podcast.

Vull dir,

I mean,

si teniu dubtes

if you have doubts

de la sèrie

from the series

David orienta'm

David, guide me.

en com començar

how to start

a veure aquesta sèrie,

let's see this series,

doncs jo us puc orientar.

Well, I can guide you.

O qualsevol cosa

Or anything.

que tingueu

that you have

de Tinc...

from I have...

Tinc un consultori.

I have a clinic.

D'acord.

Alright.

Tinc un consultori.

I have a clinic.

Doncs,

Well,

mireu,

look,

jo,

I,

que parlàvem

that we were talking about

de tot això,

of all this,

perquè posàvem notes

because we were putting grades

al capítol,

in the chapter,

jo baixo encara més

I go down even more.

que l'Anna

that Anna

un 6 pelat.

a bare 6.

Doncs a mi m'ha agradat

Well, I liked it.

força.

force.

Sí?

Yes?

O sigui,

So,

a mi m'ha agradat

I liked it.

crec que més

I think more.

que la majoria

that the majority

dels que he vist fins ara.

of those I have seen so far.

Com a persona

As a person

que només ha vist

that has only seen

la sèrie

the series

fins al capítol d'avui

until today's chapter

i no per res

and not for anything

ha vist el capítol

Have you seen the episode?

de la setmana següent,

of the following week,

doncs m'ha agradat força.

Well, I quite liked it.

Jo li posaria un 8.

I would give it an 8.

Molt bé.

Very well.

Jo,

I,

un 6 amb 7.

a 6 with 7.

Ah,

Ah,

mira,

look,

així com.

just as.

Ni pati ni per mi.

Neither yard nor for me.

Tenia falta

I was lacking.

a l'autografia.

to the autograph.

Una nota molt mediocre.

A very mediocre note.

Seria un 7,

It would be a 7,

però mira,

but look,

aquí t'has deixat el punt.

You have left your dot here.

Sabeu que una vegada

Do you know that once

vaig treure un 9,99

I got a 9.99.

perquè no vaig posar

because I didn't put

el punt

the point

al final d'unes frases?

at the end of some sentences?

Home!

Welcome home!

O sigui,

So,

era un puto 10.

he was a fucking 10.

És una falta greu, eh?

It's a serious offense, isn't it?

Però,

But,

m'han dit no.

They told me no.

Va posar un punt

He/she put a dot.

i què?

And what?

Quan acabes, eh?

When will you finish, huh?

La professora que està llegint

The teacher who is reading.

no sap mai

never knows

quan acabaràs.

When will you finish?

Es queda sense oxigen

It runs out of oxygen.

llegint.

reading.

És que la professora

It's that the teacher.

era tan així...

it was that way...

Com tu, David.

Like you, David.

Tan així com tu.

Just like you.

Tan així.

So much so.

Sí que era molt així.

Yes, it was very much like that.

Era així, la professora.

It was like that, the teacher.

Molt bé, doncs.

Very well, then.

Esperem que us hagi agradat

We hope you liked it.

aquest capítol.

this chapter.

Última cosa.

Last thing.

Digues.

Say.

Podem apuntar

We can point out.

a la historial de la Carbonell

to the history of the Carbonell

a Che Guevara.

to Che Guevara.

Dintre de la llista, ja està.

Within the list, that's it.

Ostres!

Wow!

Algú porta els números?

Is someone keeping track of the numbers?

Jo segur que no.

I certainly don't.

No, però podríem fer.

No, but we could do.

Hauríem de fer

We should do.

un document.

a document.

Sí.

Yes.

Un Excel.

An Excel.

D'acord.

Okay.

Perquè fins ara

Because until now

quins noms teníem?

What names did we have?

El Charlton Heston, no?

Charlton Heston, right?

No, però el Charlton Heston

No, but Charlton Heston.

sabem que l'ha banyat.

We know that he/she has bathed it.

Banyar és una cosa

Bathing is one thing.

i que hi hagi

and that there be

algun tipus

any type

perquè el Che Guevara

because of Che Guevara

què diu?

What does it say?

Que l'ha banyat

That has bathed him/her.

o que s'hi va liar?

or what got mixed up there?

Jo crec que diu

I think it says

que no està junts

that are not together

o alguna cosa així.

or something like that.

Ah, veus.

Ah, you see.

O que té gravatura.

Or that has engraving.

Que havien quedat.

They had agreed.

Sé que havien quedat.

I know they had made plans.

Sí, perquè es coneixen, això.

Yes, because they know each other, that.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Però, clar.

But, of course.

Per jugar al Twister.

To play Twister.

Fa name dropping.

He/She is name dropping.

Fa name dropping

He's name dropping.

i això està bé.

and that is good.

Ah, saco.

Ah, I get it.

Era fàcil guanyar-lo

It was easy to beat him.

el Che Guevara al Twister.

Che Guevara at Twister.

Sempre anava al vermell

I always went to the red.

i llavors anava...

and then I was going...

La segona si estem volent,

The second if we are wanting,

què?

What?

Això està molt polònia, tu.

This is very funny, you.

Només falta estrella de mano

Only star of hand is missing.

que ja en tenim.

that we already have.

Queda molt polònia?

Is there still a lot of polonia?

Sí, em sembla.

Yes, it seems to me.

Nosaltres també ens patrocinen.

They also sponsor us.

I es referem per dir

"And we refer to say"

que si algú ens pot patrocinar,

that if someone can sponsor us,

benvingut sigui.

welcome.

Exacte.

Exactly.

Seria fantàstic.

It would be fantastic.

Per exemple,

For example,

si ens vol patrocinar

if you want to sponsor us

Snack Day Crackers...

Snack Day Crackers...

Del Lidl.

From Lidl.

Crackers.

Crackers.

Doncs endavant,

So go ahead,

perquè en mengem sovint.

because we eat it often.

Moltes gràcies

Thank you very much.

per escoltar aquest podcast,

to listen to this podcast,

el podcast de plats bruts.

the podcast of dirty dishes.

No he fet mai un acomiadament...

I have never made a dismissal...

Va, David,

Come on, David,

que ho estàs fent bé.

that you are doing it well.

Ja ho saps.

You already know.

Estàs desvirgant d'acomiadament.

You are losing your virginity to farewell.

Així no m'ho recordava.

That's not how I remembered it.

Dic que falta alguna cosa.

I say that something is missing.

Ai, coi.

Oh, damn.

Doncs anem a fer-ho.

Well, let's do it.

Anem a fer-ho.

Let's do it.

Va, que us en recordeu.

Come on, you remember it.

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

Vale, menys mal.

Okay, thank goodness.

Tres, dos, un...

Three, two, one...

Humanos,

Humans,

yo os maldigo.

I curse you.