Els Amics de les Arts vs. The Tyets
Catalunya Ràdio
L'apocalipsi (El matí de Catalunya Ràdio)
Els Amics de les Arts vs. The Tyets
Fins demà!
See you tomorrow!
Número 424.
Number 424.
Tetes, l'apocalipsi final.
Tits, the final apocalypse.
Avui, últim concurs de la temporada.
Today, final competition of the season.
Marxem de vacances,
We are going on vacation,
però a la una arriba també
but at one o'clock it arrives too
l'últim apocalipsi.
the last apocalypse.
Donem pas a l'apocalipsi final.
We give way to the final apocalypse.
El món s'acaba.
The world is ending.
Les bases de la humanitat tromtollen.
The foundations of humanity are trembling.
Arriba el concurs
The contest is coming.
de Catalunya Ràdio on només se'n pot salvar un.
from Catalunya Ràdio where only one can be saved.
Per fi!
Finally!
Comença l'apocalipsi!
The apocalypse begins!
Benvinguts a l'apocalipsi,
Welcome to the apocalypse,
el concurs que et salvarà la vida.
the contest that will save your life.
Avui, dos grups catalans
Today, two Catalan groups
s'hi jugaran aquesta vida.
They will gamble this life.
Un d'ells s'emportarà l'últim
One of them will take the last one.
colacao que ens queda a l'estudi,
hot chocolate we have left in the study,
els últims 5 quilos.
the last 5 kilos.
Sigui com sigui, passi el que passi,
Whatever happens, no matter what,
avui tots, incloses nosaltres,
today everyone, including us,
serem arrasats i arrasades
we will be wiped out
per aquesta explosió.
for this explosion.
Donem la benvinguda
We welcome you.
a una premianenca de pro.
to a true Premianenc.
Això vol dir que avui celebrarà
This means that today you will celebrate.
el final de temporada
the season finale
amb unes postres amb sucre glas
with a dessert with icing sugar
de l'especial, del de Premià.
from the special, from Premià.
Elisenda Pineda, molt bon dia.
Elisenda Pineda, very good morning.
Escolta'm, no el prendré jo sola, eh?
Listen to me, I won't take him alone, okay?
Avui l'he portat per tothom!
Today I've brought it for everyone!
Va bé!
It's going well!
Sucre glas!
Icing sugar!
Sense gluten!
Gluten-free!
Sense gluten, evidentment!
Gluten-free, of course!
Les teves amb ombra, Charlie!
Your shadows, Charlie!
Aquestes m'agraden a mi.
I like these.
A l'altra banda hi tenim una dona
On the other side, we have a woman.
amb moltes patologies, però que encara no ha mort
with many pathologies, but has not died yet
al llarg d'aquests 424 concursos.
over the course of these 424 contests.
Tenim encara 40 minuts
We still have 40 minutes.
perquè ho faci abans que nosaltres.
so that he does it before us.
Charlie P, molt bon dia!
Charlie P, good morning!
Molt bon dia, Elisenda.
Good morning, Elisenda.
Que bon dia de dia!
What a beautiful day!
Que estaria aquí l'últim dia!
That I would be here on the last day!
Agafa-la, agafa-la, que aquesta n'hi haurà dos dies!
Take it, take it, because it will be here for two days!
I mira, eh?
And look, huh?
I em va la hierba en un camoere!
I'm going crazy!
Ens volíem estalviar un sou i això no va passar.
We wanted to save on a salary and that didn't happen.
Bueno, una mica us l'heu estalviat, també,
Well, you've saved it a bit, too.
perquè jo el que haurà de cobrar, el que es cobrar,
because I what will have to collect, what will be collected,
no ho he vist gaire.
I haven't seen it much.
Una abraçada...
A hug...
Unes olives que vaig comprar l'altre dia,
Some olives that I bought the other day,
relleres d'enxova.
sardine rillettes.
Massarades sense gluten.
Gluten-free crackers.
A la quarta pota dels nostres guions,
At the fourth leg of our scripts,
un home amb veu de mossèn i esperit de hippie.
a man with a priest's voice and a hippie's spirit.
És el nou Gandhi en versió sul-sulenca.
He is the new Gandhi in sul-sul version.
T'estimem, Oriol Gilibets.
We love you, Oriol Gilibets.
Molt bon dia.
Very good morning.
Bon dia, tingui, Elisenda Carot.
Good morning, here you go, Elisenda Carot.
De fet, no hi ha tanta diferència entre els mossens i els hippies.
In fact, there is not much difference between priests and hippies.
Uns creuen en l'humor lliure i els altres el practiquen.
Some believe in free humor and others practice it.
Gilibets, com t'has passat d'aquí?
Gilibets, how did you get here?
Ara t'ha espantat el convidat.
Now you've scared the guest.
És que ha sentit una veu i ha dit,
It is that she heard a voice and said,
oi, mossèn, veu divina, i ho duu coixut, aquesta sèrie.
Oh, priest, divine voice, and it carries limping, this series.
No, no, un mossèn per darrere mai no és una idea.
No, no, a priest from behind is never a good idea.
Vull dir que...
I mean that...
Paraula d'exmarista.
Word of an ex-marista.
A la producció executiva, com sempre,
In the executive production, as always,
en Joan Rufes i l'Oriol Jara.
Joan Rufes and Oriol Jara.
Al vídeo, avui tenim el nostre estimat Josep Maria Sánchez,
In the video, today we have our beloved Josep Maria Sánchez,
a la producció, el grandíssim David Bueno,
in production, the great David Bueno,
que ell sí que ens ha salvat la vida des que ha arribat,
that he has indeed saved our lives since he arrived,
i el creador d'aquesta nau sonora,
and the creator of this sound ship,
un home que sent els colors de l'apocalipsi,
a man who hears the colors of the apocalypse,
que li hauríem de fer un escut perquè només el patonegi ell,
that we should make him a shield so that only he takes the blows,
el pare fundador del so apocalíptic, l'Albert Joder.
the founding father of apocalyptic sound, Albert Joder.
Vengo a daros las gracias. Gracias de verdad.
I come to thank you. Thank you very much.
Gràcies a ti, Albert. Gràcies.
Thank you, Albert. Thank you.
Guapo! Guapo!
Handsome! Handsome!
Alberto, mira'ns, hòstia, una abraçada.
Alberto, look at us, damn, a hug.
Diu, no puc mirar-vos, que estic al control dels mans.
He says, I can't look at you because I'm in control of my hands.
Acabo de descobrir que allà hi ha un tècnic.
I just discovered that there is a technician there.
Com que hi ha un tècnic?
Why is there a technician?
Que des d'aquí no el veig.
I can't see him from here.
Calla, que és Albert, existeix.
Shut up, it's Albert, he exists.
Jo pensava que era algú que estava en algun lloc omnipresent.
I thought it was someone who was in some omnipresent place.
Eteri.
Eteri.
A la una s'acaba el món i en tenim les proves.
At one o'clock the world ends and we have the evidence.
Quina prova ens en portes?
What proof do you bring us?
El món s'acaba, perquè l'any que ve no podrem gaudir
The world is ending, because next year we won't be able to enjoy.
del talent enorme i de l'amistat sincera
of enormous talent and sincere friendship
d'una de les persones més meravelloses d'aquest equip.
from one of the most wonderful people on this team.
Espero que algun dia la vida em doni l'oportunitat
I hope that one day life will give me the opportunity.
de demanar-te curro i que m'agafis.
to ask you for a job and for you to hire me.
Moltes gràcies, Oriol Gilibet.
Thank you very much, Oriol Gilibet.
Bravo, Gilibet!
Bravo, Gilibet!
Arribat des de Solsona.
Arrived from Solsona.
Ara s'està plorant, l'Oriol Gilibet.
Now Oriol Gilibet is crying.
S'ha clavat vinent a l'hipertensió.
He has developed hypertension.
Jo no m'he posat rímel per si de cas.
I haven't put on mascara just in case.
El rímel avui no t'obliguis.
Don't force yourself to wear mascara today.
No vull interrompre aquest moment d'obesió,
I don't want to interrupt this moment of obsession,
perquè l'Oriol Gilibet s'ho mereix tot i més.
because Oriol Gilibet deserves everything and more.
I tant.
Me too.
Deixem que som-hi.
Let's go for it.
Gilibet, no marxis a Solsona.
Gilibet, don’t leave for Solsona.
Diu, para, para.
He says, stop, stop.
Charlie, segona prova que el món s'acaba.
Charlie, second proof that the world is coming to an end.
Doncs mira, el món no s'acaba i punt, acceptem-ho.
Well, look, the world doesn't end and that's that, let's accept it.
Acceptem que el món no s'acaba.
We accept that the world does not end.
Jo vaig acceptar aquesta feina perquè es deia l'apocalipsi
I accepted this job because it was called the apocalypse.
i perquè tenia ganes que tot rebentés un dia
and because I felt like everything would blow up one day
i que tot se'n anés a la merda.
And that everything would go to hell.
I no només no ha patat ni se n'ha anat a la merda,
And not only has it not suffered nor has it gone to hell,
sinó que durant aquests dos anys he vingut cada puto dia
but during these two years I have come every fucking day
amb un somriure fastigós a la cara.
with a disgusting smile on his face.
No, no, no, m'heu destrossat la vida.
No, no, no, you have ruined my life.
Ara sóc feliç, tinc amics i ganes de viure.
Now I am happy, I have friends and a will to live.
Sou el pitjor que m'ha passat mai a la vida.
You are the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my life.
No us ho perdonaré mai, fills de puta.
I will never forgive you, sons of bitches.
Diu, fills de puta.
He says, sons of bitches.
Hòstia, Charlie, sí que...
Wow, Charlie, yes...
És curiós perquè els amics que has fet no som nosaltres.
It's curious because the friends you've made are not us.
No, no, som les dones de fer feines,
No, no, we are the working women,
que ens trobem al lavabo abans d'entrar
that we meet in the bathroom before entering
i em donen converses.
And they give me sneakers.
Som un dany col·lateral, nosaltres.
We are collateral damage, us.
Sí, que les estimo de veritat molt fort.
Yes, I truly love them very much.
Són molt bones ties, sí.
They are very good girls, yes.
El món s'acaba, almenys el món que hem construït nosaltres de 12 a 1,
The world is ending, at least the world we have built from 12 to 1,
però encara no.
but not yet.
A la 1 morirem,
At 1 o'clock we will die,
traspassarem, sucumbirem,
we will pass, we will succumb,
defallirem, palmarem, sortirem totes
We will fade, we will fail, we will all go out.
en pijama de fusta
in a wooden pajama
a la 1 del migdia.
at 1 in the afternoon.
Ens sumarem a les 423 morts
We will join the 423 dead.
que hem creat, aquests cadàvers
that we have created, these corpses
que hem anat enterrant al llarg d'aquestes dues temporades.
that we have been burying throughout these two seasons.
El món s'acaba, ara bé seriosament.
The world is ending, now seriously.
Ho hem avisat.
We have warned it.
Ho hem avisat durant 423 vegades
We have warned about it 423 times.
i no ens heu fet ni puto cas.
And you haven't given a damn about us.
Ara, ara.
Now, now.
Insensats, que vam crear l'apocalipsi
Fools, we who created the apocalypse.
i va arribar la Covid.
And Covid arrived.
Ara arriba l'apocalipsi final
Now the final apocalypse is coming.
i vés a saber, potser ens espera una bona notícia
And who knows, maybe a good news is awaiting us.
per la ciència i la salut.
for science and health.
Potser som nosaltres que l'hem portat, la Covid.
Maybe it’s us who brought it, Covid.
El Simón diu, ui, aquesta setmana, l'apocalipsi final.
Simon says, oh, this week, the final apocalypse.
Vinga, va, ho remuntem.
Come on, let's turn it around.
Només dic que és l'última setmana de l'apocalipsi
I'm just saying it's the last week of the apocalypse.
i que està remuntant al tema de salut.
and that is improving in the health aspect.
Va, que tenim un concurs per fer
Come on, we have a contest to do.
i hem de perpetrar un últim assassinat.
And we have to carry out one last murder.
I per fer-ho gros,
And to make it big,
avui serà un assassinat múltiple.
Today there will be a multiple murder.
Tetes, un plaer i un honor servir amb vosaltres.
Tetes, a pleasure and an honor to serve with you.
Ara, us he de dir també
Now, I have to tell you too
que les pedres del ronyó haurien estat més feixugues
that the kidney stones would have been heavier
sense vosaltres.
without you.
En últim cop, i crec que avui ho hem de fer en directe,
For the last time, and I think we need to do it live today.
el món s'acaba
the world is ending
i aquí comença...
and here it begins...
L'apocalipsi!
The apocalypse!
És el final
It's the end.
Apocalipsi
Apocalypse
Primer porto
First port
Tornem cap avall
Let's go back down.
Com ho faries?
How would you do it?
L'apocalipsi!
The apocalypse!
i m'agrada. Apocalipsi
I like it. Apocalypse.
hi ha, brindem
there is, let's toast
fort tots plegats,
strong together,
gent que parla.
people who talk.
A vos!
To you!
Ai, ai, ai, ai, que la Pineda ha portat el sucre
Oh, oh, oh, oh, that Pineda has brought the sugar.
a primera hora. Bueno, sí,
first thing in the morning. Well, yes,
l'he animat a la criatura.
I have encouraged the creature.
M'he trobat a fora.
I found myself outside.
M'ha dit, és que pel nas, si té gluten,
He told me, it's just that through the nose, if it has gluten,
no passa res, perquè no arriba a l'estómac.
it's okay, because it doesn't reach the stomach.
Va, va, va.
Come on, come on, come on.
I m'he fotut el sucre clar. A veure, avui tenim
I have messed up the clear sugar. Let's see, today we have
convidats molt especials. De fet, ho hem dit, eh?
very special guests. In fact, we said it, right?
Assassinat múltiple. Us explico.
Multiple murder. Let me explain.
D'una banda, tenim uns homes
On one hand, we have some men.
que són amics de tot, fins i tot
who are friends with everyone, even
de les arts. És a dir, al contrari de la Charlie, eh?
of the arts. That is to say, contrary to Charlie, right?
Amics de tot. Ells són
Friends of everything. They are
Dani Alegret, Joan Enric Barceló
Dani Alegret, Joan Enric Barceló
i Ferran Piqué, és a dir, els amics de les arts.
And Ferran Piqué, that is, the friends of the arts.
I potser el que he dit
And perhaps what I have said
t'ha caigut en llum.
You have fallen into light.
Els afores a un
The outskirts to one.
descampat perdut.
lost wasteland.
Vull donar el trintent
I want to give the thirty.
si aquesta cançó fos per fi
if this song were finally
el senyal que esperaves.
the signal you were waiting for.
Avui som multitud.
Today we are a crowd.
Tenim en Dani i en Ferran.
We have Dani and Ferran.
A l'estudi número 8.
In studio number 8.
Dani i Ferran, molt bon dia. Bon dia!
Dani and Ferran, very good morning. Good morning!
Com esteu? Ens sentiu bé, estimats?
How are you? Do you hear us well, dear ones?
Us sentim perfectament
We hear you perfectly.
i no us veiem perfectament,
and we can't see you perfectly,
però us tenim presents.
but we have you in mind.
Home, intentarem que us posin la tele. David, no hi ha tele a dalt
Home, we'll try to get them to put on the TV for you. David, there's no TV upstairs.
perquè ens puguin veure a través... Ah, mira, ens veureu a través de la tele.
so they can see us through... Ah, look, you will see us through the TV.
Com si estiguéssiu veient el salvament.
As if you were watching the rescue.
A mi m'heu fet un favor molt gran, també,
You have done me a great favor as well.
per acabar dignament en l'apocalipsi
to end honorably in the apocalypse
i posar-me el Ferran en un altre escudi, perquè si no no m'hagués...
and putting Ferran on another shield, because otherwise I wouldn't have...
No, jo és que no... Espera't, espera't.
No, I just don't... Wait, wait.
Expliquem-ho. Dani i Ferran, sou a dalt.
Let's explain it. Dani and Ferran, you are up there.
Joan Enric, bon dia. Què tal, com esteu?
Joan Enric, good morning. How are you?
Tots aquí amb nosaltres, a l'estudi número 2,
Everyone here with us, in studio number 2,
que de moment representaràs els Amics de les Arts
for the moment you will represent the Amics de les Arts
fins a la primera pausa. Fantàstic.
until the first break. Fantastic.
A la següent pausa farem rotació i baixarà en Dani
In the next break, we will rotate and Dani will come down.
per allargar-li el patiment a la Pineda
to prolong his suffering at Pineda
i a la tercera pausa baixarà en Ferran.
And in the third break, Ferran will come down.
Veureu de lligar, veureu de lligar,
You will see to tie, you will see to tie.
perquè t'hi abraurro, eh?
because I will hug you, right?
A veure, Amics de les Arts.
Let's see, Amics de les Arts.
Avui concursareu, fareu equip amb la Pineda, d'acord?
Today you will compete, you will team up with Pineda, okay?
Objectiu, intentar respondre el millor possible
Objective, to try to respond as best as possible.
per salvar la vostra vida, d'acord?
to save your life, okay?
Després parlarem dels pròxims concerts, eh?
Later we will talk about the next concerts, okay?
Que vull que la gent agafi paper i boli,
I want people to take paper and a pen,
perquè tenim aquí, mira, un, dos, tres, quatre concerts mínim
because we have here, look, one, two, three, four concerts at least
a destacar, entre molts d'altres que podeu consultar
to highlight, among many others that you can consult
a la pàgina web dels Amics de les Arts.
on the website of the Amics de les Arts.
A l'altra banda, hi tenim uns homes
On the other side, we have some men.
que un dia van decidir posar-se un nom anglès
that one day they decided to give themselves an English name
a Catalunya. Tot i que ara,
in Catalonia. Although now,
per tot el país, són els seus tiets.
Across the country, they are their uncles.
Ells són Oriol Ramon i Xavier Coca.
They are Oriol Ramon and Xavier Coca.
Estem parlant dels detalls, els tiets.
We are talking about the details, the uncles.
Deu-ho!
Do it!
Sents tu que la nostra cançó de l'estiu
Do you feel that our summer song
a l'estudi número 5
in study number 5
hi tenim en Xavier Coca. Xavier, bon dia!
Here we have Xavier Coca. Xavier, good morning!
Hola, bon dia, com estàs? Com estàs, Xavier?
Hello, good morning, how are you? How are you, Xavier?
Molt bé. Estàs solet aquí dalt, eh?
Very good. You're all alone up here, huh?
No, estic acompanyadet. Amb els Amics de les Arts, clar.
No, I am accompanied. With the Amics de les Arts, of course.
Està ben acompanyat.
He is well accompanied.
Això és veritat, això és veritat.
This is true, this is true.
Oriol, bon dia. Bona, què tal?
Oriol, good morning. Good, how are you?
Tu ets aquí per representar els tiets en aquest duel, eh?
You are here to represent the uncles in this duel, right?
Sí, m'hi acabo de trobar i he dit
Yes, I just ran into him/her and I said
on està en Coca?
Where is Coca?
Això et passa per arribar a l'estudi.
This happens to you for arriving at the studio.
Prou, prou, prou, que és horari protegit.
Enough, enough, enough, it's protected time.
És igual, és l'últim dia.
It doesn't matter, it's the last day.
No torneu dilluns, si no torneu dilluns.
Do not return on Monday, if you do not return on Monday.
A veure! Ui, mira, no torneu dilluns.
Let's see! Oh, look, you won't be back on Monday.
Veniu-nos a buscar a la platja, a veure.
Come pick us up at the beach, let's see.
A veure, tiets, anireu amb la Charlie, d'acord?
Let's see, guys, you'll go with Charlie, okay?
Molt bé. En cas que hi hagi proves d'aquí,
Very well. In case there is evidence from here,
anireu amb la Charlie. Va, objectiu,
You will go with Charlie. Come on, objective.
sobreviure a la una del migdia.
survive at twelve o'clock noon.
I moment de començar aquest apocalipsi final.
The moment to start this final apocalypse.
Som-hi.
Let's go.
Però per què m'heu d'enfonsar en la misèria
But why must you plunge me into misery?
l'últim dia de l'apocalipsi?
the last day of the apocalypse?
Mira, vols que no t'enfonsem?
Look, do you want us to not sink you?
Crec que avui tu no hi participes.
I think you are not participating today.
Sí que hi participes, però d'una altra manera.
Yes, you do participate, but in a different way.
És a dir, avui la putada serà per l'Oriol
That is to say, today the hassle will be for Oriol.
i per en Joan Enric.
and for Joan Enric.
Us explico. Teniu uns papers aquí, d'acord?
I'll explain. You have some papers here, okay?
Teniu unes paraules, no les mires encara, Oriol,
You have some words, don't look at them yet, Oriol,
que ja t'estic veient. Teniu unes paraules
that I can already see you. You have some words.
subratllades que són les que heu de definir.
underlined that are the ones you need to define.
D'acord? I teniu tres paraules prohibides
Okay? And you have three forbidden words.
a sota que no podeu fer servir per definir
below that you cannot use for definition
aquests conceptes. Com ho farem?
these concepts. How will we do it?
Pineda, Charlie, ho fem tot per equips.
Pineda, Charlie, we do everything as a team.
Per tant, començarà en Joan Enric
Therefore, Joan Enric will start.
a definir i esteu activats els tres.
to define and you are all three activated.
En Ferran i tu. D'acord. I parleu els tres
Ferran and you. Alright. And the three of you talk.
el primer que l'encertis serà un punt, d'acord?
The first one you get right will be one point, okay?
Tot en equips. Comencem per en Joan Enric.
All in teams. Let's start with Joan Enric.
Tindràs un minut. A partir d'ara,
You will have a minute. From now on,
Joan Enric i temps.
Joan Enric and time.
Personatge,
Character,
literatura, catalana,
Catalan literature
popular...
popular...
Nen, menut,
Boy, small,
panxa, boví...
belly, bovine...
Empatofet. Correcte, següent.
Empatofet. Correct, next.
Camp...
Field...
Pots dir frases.
You can say sentences.
Pots fer frases. Ah, d'acord, d'acord.
You can make sentences. Ah, okay, okay.
Amb Messi,
With Messi,
i jugues...
and you played...
A sobre. A l'herba. Correcte, següent.
On top. On the grass. Correct, next.
Quan els tres ens anem
When the three of us go.
a fer la nostra feina,
to do our job,
fem un... Concert. Correcte.
let's have a... Concert. Correct.
És un lloc
It is a place.
envoltat de mar
surrounded by sea
on s'hi fa molta festa.
there is a lot of celebration going on.
Correcte.
Correct.
Següent.
Next.
Va, Joan Enric. Llavors,
Come on, Joan Enric. Then,
aquests dies n'hi ha hagut
there have been some these days
tres de molt importants. Festival. Correcte.
three very important. Festival. Correct.
Llavors,
Then,
se'ns acaba...
it's running out for us...
L'estiu.
The summer.
No, no, no, quan...
No, no, no, when...
Amb el telèfon, se'ns acaba...
With the phone, we are running out...
Correcte.
Correct.
Llavors, un animal que la mare...
Then, an animal that the mother...
Següent. Ah, perdó.
Next. Ah, sorry.
Una...
One...
És moníssim, perquè cada cop que falla
It's adorable, because every time it fails.
t'ha dit perdó.
he has told you sorry.
Un aplaudiment per en Joan Enric.
A round of applause for Joan Enric.
Per favor.
Please.
Som un bon equip.
We are a good team.
Sou un molt bon equip, perquè crec que
You are a very good team, because I believe that
totes les heu dit vosaltres, excepte Gespa,
you have all said it, except for Gespa.
si no m'equivoco, o el patofet. Pineda, tu n'has dit una.
If I'm not mistaken, or the patofet. Pineda, you mentioned one.
No, jo he dit herba, perquè ho he confós en una altra cosa,
No, I said grass, because I confused it with something else.
però era Gespa, que ho ha dit algú de dalt.
but it was Gespa, who said it from above.
Gespa, d'acord, doncs ho han encertat tots ells, no?
Grass, okay, so they all got it right, didn't they?
Ho haurà dit en Ferran, que és molt bo.
Ferran must have said it, as he is very good.
Cinc respostes correctes, ja hi som.
Five correct answers, here we are.
Ferran, alerta quan baixis després de la segona publicitat,
Ferran, be careful when you come down after the second advertisement.
perquè aquí, directament, t'atrecarà la pineda, eh?
because here, directly, the pine grove will come to you, right?
És festival, és festival.
It's a festival, it's a festival.
Jo l'hi sé reconèixer, també.
I can recognize him/her too.
Cinc respostes correctes per la part dels amics
Five correct answers from the friends.
de les arts, d'acord?
of the arts, okay?
Ara anem a la vostra banda, tiets. Oriol,
Now we are coming to your side, uncles. Oriol,
ho hauràs de fer molt bé.
You will have to do it very well.
Fens un minut, mateixa dinàmica.
Take a minute, same dynamic.
Charlie i Xavi, esteu activats, d'acord?
Charlie and Xavi, are you activated, okay?
Vinga, som-hi.
Come on, let's go.
Reacció del cos que es passa amb un sostú.
Body reaction that occurs with a substitute.
Cinglot, correcte.
Whiplash, correct.
Beguda, perdó, he dit beguda.
Drink, sorry, I said drink.
Següent.
Next.
Cervesa calenta al costat de...
Warm beer next to...
Pots fer frases.
You can make sentences.
Es veu cervesa calenta i va anar
It looks like hot beer and he/she went.
un amic nostre de vacances...
A friend of ours on vacation...
Octoberfest.
Octoberfest.
Hi ha enjotes per aquí, o no?
Are there any wasps around here, or not?
Sí, sí, sí.
Yes, yes, yes.
Al costat de UK.
Next to the UK.
A Irlanda. Correcte.
To Ireland. Correct.
I anem a prendre coses...
And let's go take things...
Correcte.
Correct.
És una ciutat del sud d'Espanya.
It is a city in the south of Spain.
A Sevilla. Correcte.
To Seville. Correct.
Molt bé.
Very good.
Un quadre molt famós.
A very famous painting.
Les venines.
The veins.
No, hi surt només una persona, una noia.
No, only one person appears, a girl.
De bona vista. Correcte.
Good sight. Correct.
És el que ens posen a l'extremitat...
It's what they put at the extremity...
Superior.
Superior.
A la cuna. Correcte.
To the cradle. Correct.
El que fem amb els amics i amigues...
What we do with friends...
Cantar.
To sing.
En un pati fent...
In a yard doing...
Jugar a futbol.
Play football.
Fent un menjar.
Making a meal.
Eh... barbacoa. Correcte.
Eh... barbecue. Correct.
Un moment, un moment.
One moment, one moment.
Unes set respostes correctes
Seven correct answers.
pels qui ets jo i la Charlie.
for those who I am and Charlie.
No ho veus, no?
You don't see it, do you?
Què et passa?
What is happening to you?
Què impugnes ara?
What do you challenge now?
Em sembla molt fort qui hagi escrit aquesta prova
I find it very strong that someone has written this test.
perquè a Mona Lisa en cap cas hi ha quadre.
because in no case is there a painting in the Mona Lisa.
Exacte, pintura...
Exactly, painting...
Es comença definint d'una manera...
It starts by defining in a way...
Ni França, ni París.
Neither France nor Paris.
És veritat, és veritat.
It's true, it's true.
Home, era molt més fàcil.
At home, it was much easier.
Però a veure...
But let's see...
Jo també ho he pensat, eh?
I’ve thought about it too, you know?
No vull dir res, eh? Però...
I don't want to say anything, okay? But...
Amb la lògica d'una persona que diuen
With the logic of a person they say
l'extremitat superior, i crec que d'Alan Xavi ha dit...
the upper extremity, and I think Alan Xavi has said...
Samarreta?
T-shirt?
He pensat, què diu?
I thought, what does he say?
Bueno, això era la comunicació.
Well, that was the communication.
A Patufet no hi ha ni nen, ni panxa, ni bou.
There is neither a boy, nor a belly, nor an ox in Patufet.
La de Patufet ha estat molt ben tirada.
The one about Patufet has been very well told.
Tant i que ha dit boví, eh?
So much for saying bovine, huh?
Jo sé que queden paraules i prou.
I know that there are enough words.
Llavors anava molt perdut.
Back then I was very lost.
President de Catalunya.
President of Catalonia.
100 respostes correctes per part dels tiets.
100 correct answers from the uncles.
Per tant, 30 punts al marcador dels tiets.
Therefore, 30 points on the uncles' scoreboard.
Bueno, bueno, bueno.
Well, well, well.
Els tiets, per cert, avui toquen
The uncles, by the way, are playing today.
a la Riera de Gaià.
to the Riera de Gaià.
I demà, a l'Esmolat, a Mata de Pera.
And tomorrow, at Esmolat, in Mata de Pera.
Aquest senolat.
This signal.
Ai, no fotis.
Oh, no way.
Què ha passat?
What has happened?
Tindran ressaca de vosaltres.
They will have a hangover from you.
Home, què ha passat?
Dad, what happened?
No ho sé.
I don't know.
Una pandèmia?
A pandemic?
El 22 d'agost, al Tinglado, a Vilanova i la Geltrú,
On August 22, at the Tinglado, in Vilanova i la Geltrú,
i molts més.
and many more.
També els podeu consultar a la pàgina web.
You can also consult them on the website.
Després repassarem els altres concerts.
Then we will review the other concerts.
A veure, moment d'anar a la següent prova.
Let's see, it's time to go to the next test.
També val 30 punts, i aquí us haureu de mullar
It also counts for 30 points, and here you will have to get wet.
amb les vostres vides personals.
with your personal lives.
Som-hi.
Let's go.
Molaria que avui totes les cintes les féssim nosaltres.
I would love for us to do all the ribbons today.
Ah, va.
Oh, come on.
Si cantéssim bé, també.
If we sang well, too.
És igual.
It doesn't matter.
Per sort que sentim aquesta sintonia,
Fortunately, we feel this connection,
i sobretot cantada per nosaltres, eh?
And especially sung by us, right?
Un dia explicarem l'anècdota
One day we will tell the anecdote.
de com ballàvem la sintonia de l'anècdota
of how we danced to the tune of the anecdote
i com la cantàvem, què us sembla?
And how we sang it, what do you think?
Exacte, exacte.
Exactly, exactly.
Avui ho farem, un meta-anècdota.
Today we will do it, a meta-anecdote.
A veure, com funciona?
Let's see, how does it work?
Haureu d'explicar una anècdota per equips,
You will have to explain an anecdote by teams.
és a dir, per grups musicals, d'acord?
That is to say, by musical groups, okay?
A tres veus en un cas, en el primer cas,
In three voices in one case, in the first case,
i a dues veus en el segon cas.
and in two voices in the second case.
L'altre grup, amb l'ajuda de la Pineda i la Charlie cadascun,
The other group, with the help of Pineda and Charlie each,
haurà d'intentar esbrinar
will have to try to find out
si és una anècdota real o inventada.
whether it is a true or invented anecdote.
20 punts.
20 points.
Ets tu, no?
It's you, isn’t it?
A veure si són els amics que estan cantant.
Let's see if it's the friends who are singing.
20 punts si aconseguiu enganxar la mentida o no.
20 points if you manage to catch the lie or not.
Comencem, si us sembla, amb els amics de les arts.
Let's start, if you agree, with the friends of the arts.
Breument, heu de fer un titular,
Briefly, you need to make a headline.
així a tres veus, de la vostra anècdota,
thus in three voices, from your anecdote,
i els tiets intentaran esbrinar si és real o inventada.
And the uncles will try to find out if it's real or made up.
Endavant.
Forward.
El titular podria ser...
The headline could be...
El Carme sempre torna.
Carmen always returns.
El Carme sempre torna, diu en Dani.
Carmen always returns, says Dani.
Això està molt bé perquè avui és la Mare de Déu del Carme.
This is really nice because today is Our Lady of Mount Carmel.
Felicitem a tots.
Congratulations to everyone.
Ai, és veritat.
Oh, it's true.
I les Mari Carmes.
And the Mari Carmes.
La meva sàvia.
My wise one.
I jo, que sóc la Mari Carmen.
And me, who is Mari Carmen.
La Mari Carmen.
Mary Carmen.
També, també, i tant.
Also, also, of course.
El Dani ha fet aquest titular.
Dani has made this headline.
A veure si podeu ampliar una miqueta l'entradeta.
Let's see if you can expand a little on the introduction.
Doncs, us heu d'imaginar Canet Rock, d'acord?
Well, you have to imagine Canet Rock, okay?
Estava amb el Camerino de Canet Rock.
I was with the Camerino de Canet Rock.
Passen moltes hores.
Many hours pass.
És un d'aquests festivals on passes moltes hores abans de tocar-hi.
It's one of those festivals where you spend many hours before getting to play.
I llavors en Joan Enric diu...
And then Joan Enric says...
Ostres, he trobat un vídeo boníssim
Wow, I found a great video!
que l'haig de compartir amb vosaltres.
that I have to share with you.
Riureu, però riureu moltíssim.
You will laugh, but you will laugh a lot.
Llavors ens posa un vídeo.
Then he/she shows us a video.
Ai.
Oh.
De Wizard.
Of Wizard.
Sí, és un vídeo d'uns estudiants nord-americans
Yes, it is a video of some American students.
tocant una cançó de Wizard.
playing a song by Wizard.
D'acord.
Okay.
En una festa final, diguéssim, de curs.
At a final party, let's say, of the course.
Ahà.
Aha.
I els quatre estan allà tocant.
And the four of them are there playing.
Nois molt joves, eh?
Very young boys, huh?
Imagineu.
Imagine.
Nois molt joves de 10, 12 anys.
Very young boys aged 10, 12 years.
I en el moment que...
And at the moment that...
Són desastrosos.
They are disastrous.
I en el moment que el noi del piano posa les mans al piano,
And at the moment the boy at the piano places his hands on the piano,
al piano li cau a terra.
The piano falls to the ground.
Pou.
Well.
Li cau sobre els peus.
It falls on his feet.
El nen es queda allà.
The boy stays there.
Tota la banda para de tocar.
The whole band stops playing.
Sí.
Yes.
I es miren.
And they look at each other.
Es miren.
They look at each other.
I nosaltres, que estàvem veient el vídeo, ens patem de riure.
And we, who were watching the video, couldn't help but laugh.
El pal que he pringat, no?
The stick that I have messed up, right?
Fa molt de riure.
It's very funny.
Podeu buscar el riure perquè...
You can seek laughter because...
Fa molta pena, però...
It's very sad, but...
Fa pena, però...
It's sad, but...
Exacte.
Exactly.
És molt còmic.
It's very funny.
En el moment en què aixeca les mans i pica el piano, cau el teclat a terra.
At the moment he raises his hands and hits the piano, the keyboard falls to the ground.
Pobre.
Poor.
Vam estar rient d'això les dues hores que teníem fins a tocar,
We were laughing about this for the two hours we had until our turn.
tornar-la a posar, vam fer un gui...
put it back on, we made a guide...
Criatures de 10 anys, eh?
Creatures of 10 years old, huh?
Sí, sí.
Yes, yes.
I els amics allà...
And the friends there...
Espera, espera.
Wait, wait.
Que no està, que no està.
It's not there, it's not there.
Ai, ai, ai.
Oh, oh, oh.
Espera, espera.
Wait, wait.
Pugem a l'escenari.
We go up to the stage.
Primer tema.
First topic.
Bona nit, Canet Rock.
Good night, Canet Rock.
A tope.
On fire.
I en Dani es posa davant del piano.
And Dani sits in front of the piano.
Em poso jo davant.
I'll go in front.
Evidentment, els canvis es fan molt ràpid al Canet Rock,
Obviously, changes happen very quickly at Canet Rock,
perquè hi ha molts grups, i tal qual fico les mans per començar a tocar,
because there are many groups, and as soon as I put my hands in to start playing,
en aquest cas, un tema molt carinyero en què començàvem els concerts,
in this case, a very affectionate theme with which we started the concerts,
el piano se'n va a terra...
the piano is going to the ground...
No, no, no.
No, no, no.
I es desploma absolutament...
And it collapses absolutely...
I es trenca.
And it breaks.
No, no, per sort el piano no es va trencar,
No, fortunately the piano didn't break.
però...
but...
Però, bueno, va ser un desastre absolut, van sortir tots els backliners,
But, well, it was an absolute disaster, all the backliners came out.
anaven a arreglar-ho, els altres anaven allargant la intro,
they were going to fix it, the others were prolonging the intro,
la intro era eterna, la intro més llarga que hem fet.
the intro was eternal, the longest intro we have done.
Jo crec que els nens americans ho tenen gravat, això, a s'obrir a darrere.
I believe that American kids have this ingrained, to open up from behind.
Piano de cua o no?
Grand piano or not?
Esteu fent un bucle infinit, és a dir, ara hi haurà un grup
You are creating an infinite loop, meaning there will be a group now.
a sobre un escenari dels Estats Units veient el vostre vídeo,
on a stage in the United States watching your video,
entrant a directe i cascant el piano a terra, i així fins a l'infinit.
entering directly and crashing the piano to the ground, and so on to infinity.
Hi haurà un grup a Nord-Amèrica que els miri veient el vídeo dels nens...
There will be a group in North America watching the video of the children...
Ara, ara.
Now, now.
No, i això no acabarà mai.
No, and this will never end.
No acabarà mai, és un bucle infinit.
It will never end, it's an infinite loop.
Sí, no, allò, ens ve algun grup de traperos que no porta piano,
Yes, no, that, a group of ragpickers is coming that doesn't bring a piano.
i aquí s'acaba la història.
And here ends the story.
Que pa i nai, no?
What a pair, right?
I comencen a cantar, que pa i nai.
And they start to sing, that mom and dad.
A veure, aquesta és l'anècdota d'en Joan Enric, d'en Dani i d'en Ferran,
Let's see, this is the anecdote of Joan Enric, Dani, and Ferran.
dels Amics de les Arts.
from the Friends of the Arts.
També us dic que Amics de les Arts...
I also tell you that Amics de les Arts...
Home...
Home...
No sabeu mentir, eh?
You don't know how to lie, do you?
No, no, no hi ha més preguntes, senyorita.
No, no, there are no more questions, miss.
Teniu preguntes o no, Tiets i Charlie?
Do you have questions or not, Uncle and Charlie?
Jo crec que és veritat, eh?
I believe it's true, right?
No, no fotis...
No, don’t mess with me...
Que tu vas amb ells, Pineda.
You go with them, Pineda.
Per això?
For that?
Jo crec que és veritat.
I believe that it's true.
Jo crec que és la història d'una cançó que ja tenen publicada i tot, eh?
I think it's the story of a song that they already have published and everything, right?
Segurament.
Surely.
Tu creus que és veritat, Oriol?
Do you think it's true, Oriol?
Ah, sí, jo crec que sí.
Ah, yes, I think so.
Xavi, què en penses?
Xavi, what do you think?
Jo també penso que és veritat.
I also think that it's true.
Jo estic a tope amb els Tiets.
I am all in with the Uncles.
A tope veritat, no?
To the max, right?
Evidentment.
Obviously.
Ai, quins usos que sou!
Oh, what a bunch of uses you are!
Per 20 punts, aquesta anècdota és...
For 20 points, this anecdote is...
És veritat!
It's true!
Doncs no s'hi ha de pensar tan ràpid.
Well, you don't have to think about it so quickly.
Joan Henric, és que no hi havia manera d'enganyar-nos.
Joan Henric, there was no way to fool us.
Jo he propostat que diguéssim a última hora que apareixia Michael Douglas o algun觀í
I have suggested that we say at the last minute that Michael Douglas or some other guest would appear.
que més surrealista, però no m'han fet cas.
how more surreal, but they haven't listened to me.
Tampoc t'hauries d'enganxar a la mentida, eh?
You also shouldn't get caught up in the lie, okay?
No!
No!
Si haguessis dit, hi apareix Michael Douglas i aguantàveu el piano.
If you had said, Michael Douglas appears and you were holding the piano.
Segur.
Sure.
Vint punts que pugen el marcador dels tiets.
Twenty points that raise the uncles' score.
Amb un dit.
With a finger.
Amb un dit petit, eh?
With a little finger, huh?
Curiosa, és que no hoy en tagles com és.
Curiously, I don't know how it is today in Tagles.
A veure, vint punts que pugen el marcador dels Tiets i la Charli, per tant 50 punts del marcador
Let's see, twenty points that increase the score of the Tiets and Charli, therefore 50 points on the scoreboard.
del Carles i la Carli, 0 punts
from Carles and Carli, 0 points
del marcador dels amics dels Arts i la Pineda.
from the marker of the friends of Arts and Pineda.
Anem fatal, eh? No passa res.
We're doing terrible, huh? It's okay.
No passa res. Va, fem-ho al revés.
It's okay. Come on, let's do it the other way around.
A veure, tiets, explica'm una anècdota.
Let's see, guys, tell me an anecdote.
Que en tens alguna, Jotas?
Do you have one, Jotas?
Sí, en tinc una. Va, tira, tira, Jotas.
Yes, I have one. Go on, go on, Jotas.
Explicaré la de quan vam anar
I will explain the one about when we went.
a fer un projecte a Beirut
to do a project in Beirut
i... Mentida!
I... Lie!
Ah, mentida!
Ah, lie!
Vam estar durant una setmaneta
We were there for about a week.
treballant a Beirut i justament
working in Beirut and just
el dia que havíem de tornar,
the day we were supposed to return,
el dia següent començàvem l'estage
The next day we started the internship.
per preparar el directe.
to prepare the live performance.
Total, que eren les 3 de la matinada,
So, it was 3 in the morning,
arribem a l'aeroport de Beirut,
we arrive at Beirut airport,
mirem
let's see
allà els vols que sortien
there the flights that departed
i no sortia el nostre vol.
and our flight was not departing.
No existia.
It did not exist.
Total, que vam començar
So, we started.
a preguntar allà als militars
to ask the military there
a veure si tal, tal, que no, que no,
let's see if such and such, no, no,
que no. Vam agafar un taxi que només parlava
No. We took a taxi that only spoke.
àrab, no tenia GPS, no teníem internet,
Arab, we didn't have GPS, we didn't have internet,
no sabíem què fer i vam aconseguir
we didn't know what to do and we succeeded
tornar, finalment,
return, finally,
a casa del nostre amic
at our friend's house
i el dia següent vam poder agafar un vol
And the next day we were able to catch a flight.
i vam poder arribar a l'estage directe
and we were able to reach the direct stage
dormint entre aeroports, avions
sleeping between airports, planes
i una mica com podíem.
and a little bit as we could.
Aquesta és l'anècdota dels tiets.
This is the anecdote of the uncles.
Alerta, l'anècdota dels tiets, no ho sé.
Alert, the anecdote about the uncles, I don't know.
L'anècdota és l'anècdota de quasi no arribar a un concert.
The anecdote is the anecdote of almost not making it to a concert.
Al final arriben, vull dir.
In the end, they arrive, I mean.
L'Oriol ha aixecat una cella sospitosament.
Oriol has raised an eyebrow suspiciously.
Ha dit com, bah, això està inventant,
He said, oh, this is making up.
deixem-lo sol.
leave him alone.
Amics, amics i Pirena.
Friends, friends and Pirena.
És una merda d'anècdota, perdoneu-me.
It’s a stupid anecdote, forgive me.
Una gran merda d'anècdota.
A big piece of crap anecdote.
Mira, només per això
Look, just because of that.
el Joan Enric li hauríem de donar 20 punts.
We should give Joan Enric 20 points.
Sí senyora, 20 punts per Joan Enric.
Yes ma'am, 20 points for Joan Enric.
Crec que sí, crec que sí.
I think so, I think so.
Per la sensatesa.
For the sake of wisdom.
Acaba de dir el mateix que veia jo
He just said the same thing that I was seeing.
un minut havia dit i a mi no m'has donat.
You said one minute, and you haven't given me one.
Perquè tu no ets el Joan Enric dels Amics de la Natal.
Because you are not Joan Enric from the Amics de la Natal.
Ah, d'acord, perquè si no puntues tu un altre cop
Ah, okay, because if you don't score again.
jo et porto una samarreta dels Manel.
I will bring you a Manel t-shirt.
He explicat-ho?
Have I explained it?
A provocar has vingut, eh?
You've come to provoke, huh?
És que a mi m'han dit, venen els Amics de la Natal contra uns altres.
I've been told that the Friends of Natalie are coming against some others.
Tipo, els altres són els Manel.
Like, the others are Manel.
I m'he posat les meves millors gades.
I have put on my best shoes.
Ha fet el millor xiste de tot el món.
He made the best joke in the world.
Molt bé.
Very good.
L'últim dia m'ha hagut d'esperar.
The last day had to wait for me.
L'últim dia se l'estava guardant, eh?
You were saving it for the last day, right?
És el puto millor xiste que ha fet la tia.
It's the fucking best joke that the girl has made.
Amb bugit, amb bugit.
With a bug, with a bug.
Uau.
Wow.
Se l'ha guardat per l'últim dia.
He has saved it for the last day.
La teva també feia ombra, eh, Pineda?
Yours also cast a shadow, right, Pineda?
Sí, sí, Déu-n'hi-do.
Yes, yes, indeed.
Mare meva, jo que he esmorzat un cafè endet.
My goodness, I only had a coffee for breakfast.
A veure, amics, ara ja no sé on estàvem.
Let's see, friends, now I don't know where we were.
Heu de decidir si aquesta anècdota real o inventada
You have to decide whether this anecdote is real or invented.
podeu fer una pregunta, una pregunteta.
you can ask a question, a little question.
Pineda, va.
Pineda, go.
Què tal per Beirut?
How's it going for Beirut?
Digue-li, Dufi.
Tell him, Dufi.
Home, sabem que Beirut han estat, això ho sabem de veritat.
At home, we know that Beirut has been, we really know this.
Sí.
Yes.
Jo crec que és veritat perquè ha parlat de militars per allà al mig
I think it's true because he talked about soldiers around there.
i no hi pintaven res, els militars.
and the military had no say in it.
No n'hi ha cap, a Beirut, de militars.
There are no soldiers in Beirut.
Per això, però vull dir que ha dit militars,
That's why, but I mean to say that he mentioned military.
per tant és un detall i jo crec que és veritat.
therefore it is a detail and I believe it is true.
Ah, mira, pot ser que ho hagin vestit expressament
Ah, look, they might have dressed it up on purpose.
per enganyar-vos, eh, però és una bona lògica.
to deceive you, huh, but it’s good logic.
Dieu veritat, amics.
God truth, friends.
Sí, veritat.
Yes, true.
Dieu veritat i per 20 punts aquesta anècdota és...
God truth and for 20 points this anecdote is...
Veritat.
Truth.
Ara ens ho podríem inventar i dir, no, és falsa.
Now we could make it up and say, no, it's false.
Exacte, tramposos.
Exactly, cheats.
Podríem mirar-vos els ulls i sabríem...
We could look into each other's eyes and we would know...
Mirar-vos els ulls, sí.
Looking into your eyes, yes.
Aquests, bé, els tiets menteixen més que portar lloger.
These, well, the uncles lie more than they pay rent.
50 punts al marcador dels tiets, 20 punts al marcador dels...
50 points on the uncles' scoreboard, 20 points on the...
No, no, 40 perquè n'hi has donat 20 més als...
No, no, 40 because you gave 20 more to the...
No, però l'hi he donat per si de cas no marcava
No, but I gave it to him just in case it didn't register.
perquè em sabia com greu, però ara que heu marcat ja està, no?
Because I felt bad, but now that you've marked it, it's done, right?
Home, no, no, no, perquè...
No, no, no, because...
Han sigut uns 20 punts preventius, però des de quan?
There have been about 20 preventive points, but since when?
Em sembla bé, em sembla bé.
I think it's fine, I think it's fine.
Teniu tota la raó, he dit.
You are absolutely right, I said.
No porta-la de contrària perquè un dia, si cada cop...
Don't take it the wrong way because one day, if every time...
Potser metem 5 persones, m'encanta, més que 3.
Maybe we’ll kill 5 people, I love it, more than 3.
40, tot a favor.
40, all in favor.
40 versus 50.
40 versus 50.
Em sembla bé, 40 versus 50, tots us són en dos quarts d'una.
I think it's fine, 40 versus 50, you all are at 12:30.
Farem una petita pausa per la publicitat, d'acord?
We'll take a short break for advertising, okay?
Oriol, avui tens pregunta o no?
Oriol, do you have a question today or not?
Avui no tenim pregunta, no ens queden...
Today we don't have a question, we have none left...
Ah, sí, no ens queden regals.
Ah, yes, we don't have any gifts left.
No té res per preguntar.
He has nothing to ask.
Ai, ens ho hem col·laborat.
Oh, we have collaborated on it.
Ens ho hem fumat tot.
We've smoked it all.
Bueno, en el teu cas ja és real.
Well, in your case it is already real.
Albert, marxem a la pública.
Albert, we are going to the public one.
Ara venim, fins ara.
We'll be back now, see you later.
L'apocalipsi del matí de Catalunya Ràdio, amb Elisenda Caró.
The apocalypse of the morning on Catalunya Ràdio, with Elisenda Caró.
El feminisme no fa vacances, per això a les dones i els dies
Feminism does not take a break, that's why to women and the days.
agafem el llegut i continuem remant.
we take the oar and continue rowing.
Les dones i els dies.
Women and the days.
Aquest dissabte a les dones i els dies.
This Saturday at the women and the days.
Aquests dies marxem a una illa del golf de Finlàndia.
These days we are leaving for an island in the Gulf of Finland.
I una més propera, la que ens muntem al menjador de casa.
And a closer one, the one we set up in the dining room at home.
Dues autores i dos viatges.
Two authors and two trips.
L'escriptora finesa Tove Janssen
The Finnish writer Tove Jansson
i la de la periodista catalana Marta de Riezu.
and that of the Catalan journalist Marta de Riezu.
No cal motxilla per aquest viatge.
No backpack is needed for this trip.
Les dones i els dies, amb Montse Virgili.
Women and the days, with Montse Virgili.
Els dissabtes a la mitjanit.
Saturdays at midnight.
Noteu la calor?
Do you feel the heat?
No és pel sol aquesta bola de foc groga
It's not the sun, this yellow fireball.
de lleval, però alerta, a geure sense protecció
of lifting it, but be careful, to get it without protection
tomba i tomba et posa com una gamba.
turn and turn, you end up like a shrimp.
Si ni te'n recordes de l'estiu, vine a Clarel
If you don't even remember the summer, come to Clarel.
i te'l recordem. I recorda't en tota la gamma
And we remind you. And remember it in the whole range.
de protecció solar Nivea Sant amb la segona
of Nivea sun protection Sant with the second
unitat al 50% de descompte fins al
unit at 50% discount until
27 de juliol. A recordar l'estiu.
July 27. Remembering summer.
Clarel es cuida de tu i de la teva llar.
Clarel takes care of you and your home.
Fins al 28 de juliol a La Sirena
Until July 28 at La Sirena.
tens un 3x2 en una selecció
you have a 3x2 on a selection
de productes. Marís, peix, pizzes,
of products. Seafood, fish, pizzas,
productes vegans, gelats i molts més.
vegan products, ice creams, and many more.
Que faci el que és menjar bé.
Let him do what is to eat well.
Per ser el primer has de treballar de valent,
To be the first, you have to work hard.
millorar cada dia i
improve every day and
no abaixar mai la guàrdia. Per ser el primer
never let your guard down. To be the first
has de... venir a provar el nou
you have to... come to try the new one
Nissan Qashqai.
Nissan Qashqai.
Visita el teu concessionari Nissan
Visit your Nissan dealer.
del 9 al 17 de juliol
from July 9 to July 17
i sigues el primer a conduir el nou Nissan Qashqai
and be the first to drive the new Nissan Qashqai
electrificat amb tecnologia Mild Hybrid
electrified with Mild Hybrid technology
i etiqueta Eco. Xarxa de
and Eco label. Network of
concessionaris Nissan de Catalunya.
Nissan dealers in Catalonia.
Imagina't uns quants dies de tranquil·litat i diversió
Imagine a few days of tranquility and fun.
amb família al cor de la costa del Garraf.
with family in the heart of the Garraf coast.
Gaudeix de les piscines i dels tobogans.
Enjoy the pools and the slides.
Relaxa't a l'espa, riu molt amb les activitats
Relax at the spa, laugh a lot with the activities.
i tasta la nostra gastronomia.
and taste our gastronomy.
Tot a l'aire lliure al Camping Vilanova Park.
Everything outdoors at Camping Vilanova Park.
En caravana, bungalow, tenda o mobile home
In a caravan, bungalow, tent, or mobile home.
vine a un espai segur i natural des d'on
come to a safe and natural space from where
podràs viure i crear els millors records.
you will be able to live and create the best memories.
Camping Vilanova Park, on a l'estiu es respira
Camping Vilanova Park, in summer you can breathe.
felicitat. Troba'ns a vilanovapark.com
Congratulations. Find us at vilanovapark.com
o al 938 933 402.
or at 938 933 402.
Oslo, Noruega.
Oslo, Norway.
22 de juliol del 2011.
July 22, 2011.
Uns atacs
Some attacks
terroristes fan tremolar
terrorists make tremble
tot el país.
the whole country.
Que no se'n vagi ningú cap a casa.
No one should go home.
Estem en alerta roja.
We are on red alert.
Com diu? Un home
What does he say? A man.
disparant drets?
shooting straight?
A quin dia?
On what day?
22 de juliol.
July 22.
A TV3, dilluns a la nit,
On TV3, Monday night,
estrena amb els dos primers capítols.
premiere with the first two episodes.
Estrena les vacances
Kick off the holidays.
amb cotxe nou a Ocasion Plus.
with a new car at Ocasion Plus.
Més de 4.000 cotxes disponibles
More than 4,000 cars available.
amb descomptes de fins a 6.000 euros
with discounts of up to 6,000 euros
i només fins a finals de mes.
and only until the end of the month.
No et quedis sense.
Don't be left without it.
Les millors oportunitats volen.
The best opportunities take flight.
Ocasion Plus.
Occasion Plus.
Dues botigues a Terrassa, un altre a Mataró
Two stores in Terrassa, one more in Mataró.
i també a ocasionplus.com.
and also at ocasionplus.com.
Obrim els dissabtes matí i tarda.
We are open on Saturdays morning and afternoon.
A Barcelona tens ben a prop
In Barcelona, you are very close.
tot tipus de comerços.
all types of shops.
Les millors recomanacions a cada barri.
The best recommendations in each neighborhood.
Productes de qualitat a qualsevol carrer.
Quality products on any street.
Professionals de confiança al sector de la restauració
Trusted professionals in the hospitality sector
i als comerços.
and to the shops.
A Barcelona, compra a prop bé, bo i de tot.
In Barcelona, you can buy nearby good, tasty, and everything.
Fem comerç. Fem ciutat.
We do commerce. We do city.
Barcelona mai s'atura.
Barcelona never stops.
Ajuntament de Barcelona.
City Hall of Barcelona.
Cada dia tu fas la ràdio.
Every day you do the radio.
Escolta't al Matí de Catalunya Ràdio.
Listen to you on the Morning of Catalunya Ràdio.
Amb Laura Roser.
With Laura Roser.
Catalunya Ràdio.
Catalonia Radio.
Dins teu.
Inside you.
Aquest cap de setmana
This weekend
arriba la traca final del Tot Gira.
the final bang of Tot Gira arrives.
Atenció!
Attention!
Dissabte viurem la penúltima etapa del Tour.
On Saturday we will experience the penultimate stage of the Tour.
Una contrarrellotge per decidir el pòdium final.
A countdown clock to decide the final podium.
Diumenge, l'arribada als camps elisis
Sunday, the arrival at the Elysian fields.
de la Ronda Gala
of the Gala Ring
i el gran premi de Silverstone de Fórmula 1.
and the Formula 1 Silverstone Grand Prix.
També presentarem el capítol del podcast Rècords
We will also present the chapter of the podcast Records.
Pau Gasol, any zero.
Pau Gasol, any zero.
I seguirem la partida.
And we will continue the game.
La temporada dels equips catalans de futbol.
The season of the Catalan football teams.
A més, us explicarem la programació esportiva
Additionally, we will explain the sports programming.
de Catalunya Ràdio per seguir els Jocs Olímpics de Tòquio.
from Catalunya Ràdio to follow the Tokyo Olympic Games.
Tot gira.
Everything rotates.
Dissabte i diumenge a partir de les 4 de la tarda
Saturday and Sunday from 4 PM onwards.
amb Xevi Soler.
with Xevi Soler.
L'apocalipsi del Matí de Catalunya Ràdio.
The Apocalypse of the Morning of Catalunya Ràdio.
Amb l'Evisent de Caron.
With the Evisent of Caron.
Avui estem jugant amb els tiets i amb els amics de les arts
Today we are playing with the uncles and with the friends of the arts.
que els esteu sentint ara.
that you are hearing them now.
El 22 de juliol a l'Estadi Olímpic de Barcelona.
On July 22 at the Olympic Stadium in Barcelona.
El 25 de juliol a Cap Roig, a Calella de Palafrugell.
July 25th at Cap Roig, in Calella de Palafrugell.
I el 4 d'agost a l'Arts d'Estiu a Pineda de Mar.
And on August 4th at the Arts d'Estiu in Pineda de Mar.
I molts més, eh?
And many more, huh?
Ara ho hem destacat tres perquè si no us peta el cap.
Now we have highlighted three because otherwise your head will explode.
Home, i tant.
Sure, absolutely.
No paren els estils, eh?
The styles don't stop, huh?
No paren.
They don't stop.
I a més fan uns concerts a l'estiu meravellosos
And they also give wonderful concerts in the summer.
amb cançons tranquil·letes que pots anar a rembalar
with quiet songs that you can go to sleep to
amb la teva parella.
with your partner.
És veritat, això.
That's true.
Mm, i també hi ha de...
Mm, and there is also...
Per mi la cançó de l'estiu, i per nosaltres,
For me, the song of the summer, and for us,
que ho vam decidir que era l'himne de l'estiu,
that we decided it was the anthem of the summer,
és la que hem fet amb els tiets, que avui també ens visiten.
It is the one we made with the uncles, who are also visiting us today.
Amics, tiets i coneguts.
Friends, uncles, and acquaintances.
Posa'l-hi.
Put it on.
Des que vau venir, els tiets,
Since you came, the uncles,
que anem fent la tonteria aquesta de la música d'estiu, eh?
Are we still doing this summer music nonsense, huh?
Home, i tant.
Of course, yes.
Si no fos perquè són de Mataró, ja els odiava, saps?
If it weren't because they are from Mataró, I would already hate them, you know?
A veure, hem fet canvi d'equips.
Let's see, we have changed teams.
Per què ha baixat? No, canvi d'equips.
Why has he/she gone down? No, change of teams.
S'ha baixat en Dani.
Dani has gotten off.
Dani, benvingut siguis aquí a l'estudi número 2.
Dani, welcome to studio number 2.
A dalt hi tenim en Ferran i en Joan Enric,
Up there we have Ferran and Joan Enric,
i tu, de moment, et mantens, Oriol.
And you, for now, are holding on, Oriol.
Després canviarem el Xavi, d'acord?
Then we will change Xavi, okay?
És molt xulo, Elisenda, perquè ens heu posat una tele,
It's very cool, Elisenda, because you've put a TV for us.
molt guai, perquè podeu seguir-vos i veure-us,
very cool, because you can follow each other and see each other,
i hi ha el teletienda.
And there is the teleshopping.
No hi sou vosaltres, però hi ha gent, doncs,
You are not there, but there are people, then,
bueno, que us emula, molt divertit.
Well, it emulates you, very funny.
Potser no ens has vist i estem aquí amb el nicer-dicer,
Maybe you haven't seen us, and we're here with the nicer-dicer.
quan tu no mires, saps?
when you don't look, you know?
Potser sí, potser sí, esteu molt en forma, eh?
Maybe yes, maybe yes, you are very fit, huh?
Si sou vosaltres, esteu molt...
If it's you, you are very...
A la Charlie li he comprat l'analí intruder a les dues cabezes.
I bought Charlie the intruder anal for the two heads.
Va, va, va, anem a la següent prova,
Come on, come on, come on, let's go to the next test.
o el que volem, avui acabarem amb una prova d'aquelles
or what we want, today we will end with a test of those.
que hi posarem, bueno,
what we will put there, well,
reblarem el concurs pels anals de la història.
we will nail the contest in the annals of history.
Parlem d'anals? Vinga, va, som-hi.
Shall we talk about anals? Come on, let's go.
La cançó.
The song.
Va, va, va, que hem de desafinar,
Come on, come on, come on, we have to get off-key,
heu de fer de trapero sense tune, sense autotune.
You have to be a trapper without tune, without autotune.
Bueno, en el cas del Dani, clar, afina molt,
Well, in Dani's case, of course, he fine-tunes a lot.
en el cas de l'Oriol...
in the case of Oriol...
No tant, no tant.
Not so much, not so much.
No, va, Oriol, ho farem com a mi, també.
No, come on, Oriol, we will do it like me, too.
A veure, començarem per en Dani.
Let's see, we'll start with Dani.
Dani, sentiràs una cançó,
Dani, you will hear a song,
ara entra l'Oriol i et posarà una història que tu sentiràs una cançó,
now Oriol is coming in and he will play you a story that you will hear a song,
i l'hauràs de taralegir.
and you will have to hum it.
Ja? Amb les síl·labes que et proposi l'Oriol.
Already? With the syllables that Oriol suggests to you.
Oriol, li pots anar canviant tantes vegades com vulguis les síl·labes.
Oriol, you can change the syllables as many times as you want.
Pensa que després t'ho faré jo, tu, eh?
Just think that I will do it for you later, okay?
Exacte.
Exact.
Objectiu, Ferran i Joan Enric,
Objective, Ferran and Joan Enric,
heu d'encertar la cançó que està cantant en Dani.
You have to guess the song that Dani is singing.
Pineda, tu també entres aquí, eh?
Pineda, you’re coming in here too, huh?
Sí, però bueno, no caldrà perquè van sols.
Yes, but well, it won't be necessary because they go alone.
Bueno, bueno, bueno.
Well, well, well.
Jo havia pensat fer un cop de cap, ara, a mi no em venia bé.
I had thought about making a decision, but now it wasn't convenient for me.
Ferran i Joan Enric, molt atents, d'acord?
Ferran and Joan Enric, very attentive, okay?
Dani, a patir amb les síl·labes que et proposi l'Oriol.
Dani, suffer with the syllables that Oriol proposes to you.
Quan vulguis, cançó dins.
Whenever you want, song inside.
Fe, fe, fe, fe, fe...
Faith, faith, faith, faith, faith...
Lo, lo, lo, lo, lo, lo, lo, lo...
There is no translation needed as the text consists of repetitive sounds without meaning.
Lo, lo, lo, lo, lo, lo...
The, the, the, the, the, the...
Què fas?
What are you doing?
Ara et ballo.
Now I'll dance for you.
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
Xit, xit, xit, xit, xit, xit, xit, xit, xit, xit...
Chit, chit, chit, chit, chit, chit, chit, chit, chit, chit...
Bueno, l'he perdut, eh?
Well, I've lost it, huh?
Jo també.
Me too.
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
No entenc res de la música.
I don't understand anything about music.
No sé, la Rosalia, saps per diàlogo.
I don't know, Rosalia, you know by dialogue.
Sí, sí, si el musical que esteu preparant té aquesta qualitat, tetes?
Yes, yes, if the musical you are preparing has this quality, ladies?
Ara, ara.
Now, now.
Cu, cu, cu, cu...
Coo, coo, coo, coo...
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
No és Judis.
It is not Judas.
Ah.
Ah.
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
Tra, tra, tra, tra, tra...
Shakira.
Shakira.
Joan Enric.
John Henry.
Tra, tra, tra...
Tra, tra, tra...
Ai, Shakira.
Oh, Shakira.
Shakira, correcte.
Shakira, correct.
Guaca, guaca.
Quack, quack.
Guaca, guaca, guaca, guaca...
Quack, quack, quack, quack...
La mirada de San Caeva,
The gaze of San Caeva,
porque esto es África.
because this is Africa.
Ha costat, eh?
It has been hard, hasn't it?
Sí, no, però...
Yes, no, but...
Me'n vaig, clar.
I'm leaving, of course.
Dani, has començat molt bé i després has anat a cantar la...
Dani, you started off very well and then you went to sing the...
No sé, la Macarena.
I don't know, Macarena.
No sé què has cantat allà a mi.
I don't know what you sang to me there.
A veure, però és que no hi havia...
Let's see, but there wasn't...
No hi havia lletra allà, jo...
There was no letter there, I...
I clar, i què faig, l'acompanyament?
And of course, what do I do, the accompaniment?
Però jo tinc una pregunta.
But I have a question.
Dani, tu senties el tema per dintre?
Dani, did you feel the song from the inside?
Sí, cabron.
Yes, bastard.
És que jo l'he tovent quan feia el lo-lo-lo
It's just that I found him when he was doing the lo-lo-lo.
i he entès el lo-lo-lo,
I have understood the lo-lo-lo.
però després han anat a una altra cançó.
but then they have moved on to another song.
No, no, era...
No, no, it was...
Jo què sé...
I don't know...
Crec que ha cantat Manel.
I think Manel has sung.
Sí.
Yes.
Va, 20 punts que pugen al marcador dels Amics de les Arts.
Come on, 20 points that add to the score of Amics de les Arts.
60 versus els 50 dels Tiet.
60 versus the 50 of Tiet.
Vinga, Oriol.
Come on, Oriol.
Oriol, va.
Oriol, come on.
Oriol, pots pujar a 70
Oriol, you can climb to 70.
i, per tant, tornar a pensar als Amics, d'acord?
And therefore, think again about the Friends, okay?
Molt bé.
Very well.
Tu cantaràs una cançó,
You will sing a song,
Dani, li poses les síl·labes que et doni la gana
Dani, you can put whatever syllables you like.
i a dalt, Xavi, et toca endavinar.
And up there, Xavi, it's your turn to guess.
Som-hi.
Let's go.
Xavi, tu també entres, eh?
Xavi, you’re coming in too, right?
Va bé, sí.
It's going well, yes.
Vinga, dins la cançó de l'Oriol
Come on, inside Oriol's song.
i encerten aquí baix.
And they get it right down here.
Home!
Home!
Són molt joves, potser no la coneixen.
They are very young, perhaps they do not know her.
Xavi, sí.
Xavi, yes.
Corazón partit.
Broken heart.
Va, correta!
Come on, correct!
Aquí, amb la meva cançoneta.
Here, with my little song.
Meravellós.
Wonderful.
M'he pillat per baix, eh?
I got caught underneath, huh?
Corazón partit de l'Alejandro Sanz.
Broken heart by Alejandro Sanz.
Molt bé, Xavi, un 10 per tu.
Very well, Xavi, a 10 for you.
20 punts que pugen al vostre marcador.
20 points that go up on your scoreboard.
70 a 60.
70 to 60.
Els Tiet avancen per la dreta els Amics de les Arts.
The Tiet advance to the right of the Friends of the Arts.
Oh, quins nervis.
Oh, what nerves.
Fem una prova d'aquelles ràpides, eh?
Let's do a quick test, shall we?
Va.
Let's go.
Aquesta prova posarà les coses interessants.
This test will make things interesting.
Per què?
Why?
Heu de decidir, Amics de les Arts,
You have to decide, Friends of the Arts,
esteu 60...
you are 60...
i ells estan a 70.
and they are at 70.
10 punts per sota.
10 points below.
Ara us oferim 20 punts.
Now we offer you 20 points.
Si encerteu, els sumeu.
If you get it right, you add them up.
Però si la cagueu, baixeu.
But if you mess it up, go down.
Decidiu si voleu jugar o no aquesta prova.
Decide if you want to play this test or not.
Però quina prova és? No t'ho direm.
But what proof is it? We won't tell you.
No, ens arrisquem, segur.
No, we're taking a risk, for sure.
Hem vingut a jugar.
We have come to play.
Amics, us arrisqueu?
Friends, are you taking the risk?
D'acord, doncs juguem els noms.
Okay, let's play the names.
Podreu sumar 20 punts o restar-los,
You can add 20 points or deduct them.
en funció de si us equivoqueu o no.
depending on whether you make a mistake or not.
Tindreu 5 segons per donar resposta
You will have 5 seconds to respond.
a la pregunta que us fa la Pineda.
to the question that Pineda asks you.
Parlem del cognom Amic.
Let's talk about the surname Amic.
Però Amic amb C-H, eh?
But friend with C-H, huh?
Exacte.
Exactly.
Hi ha més o menys de 200 persones
There are more or less 200 people.
que es diuen Amic de cognom.
whose surname is Amic.
Poseu-vos d'acord.
Come to an agreement.
Més o menys?
More or less?
Jo diria més, nois.
I would say more, guys.
Tots diuen més?
Does everyone say more?
Tots han dit més.
Everyone has said more.
Tots han dit més i la resposta correcta és...
Everyone has said more and the correct answer is...
Ai...
Oh...
Menys, només n'hi ha 80.
Less, there are only 80.
Acabeu de perdre 20 punts.
You have just lost 20 points.
Ho dius amb aquella...
You say it with that...
Amb aquella cadaveu que...
With that corpse that...
No sé si te n'estàs enfotent una miqueta ara mateix.
I don't know if you're making fun of me a little right now.
No, no me n'enfoto.
No, I don't make fun of it.
M'ha sortit una mica fals.
It came out a bit fake.
Bueno, bueno.
Well, well.
Ho estem intentant.
We are trying.
Us heu quedat a 40.
You have been left at 40.
No passa res.
It's okay.
No passa res perquè els recuperarem prou.
It's okay because we will recover them enough.
No passa res, no passa res.
It's okay, it's okay.
Escolta'm, anem a l'altra banda.
Listen to me, let's go to the other side.
Tiets, sou prou valents per jugar-vos 20 punts?
Uncles, are you brave enough to risk 20 points?
Això ho he arriscat també.
I have also risked this.
Sí, sí, sí.
Yes, yes, yes.
Sí, eh?
Yes, huh?
Perquè clar, si ho havíem no arriscat
Because of course, if we hadn't taken the risk.
i seguiríem 70-40.
And we would continue 70-40.
Aquí guanyant.
Here winning.
No, bueno, encara continuarem guanyant, no?
No, well, we will still keep winning, right?
Sí, sí, si perdeu, continuareu guanyant.
Yes, yes, if you lose, you will continue to win.
Clar que sí.
Of course.
Doncs si m'agradem, li va.
Well, if I like it, it suits him.
Bon jugadors, bon jugadors.
Good players, good players.
Risqui, risqui.
Laugh, laugh.
Doncs la mateixa dinàmica.
Well, the same dynamic.
La Xarri us pregunta, teniu 5 segons per respondre.
The Xarri asks you, you have 5 seconds to respond.
Anem amb el cognom Tiet.
Let's go with the surname Tiet.
Bueno, no, no hi ha Tiet a Catalunya.
Well, no, there is no Tiet in Catalonia.
Parlem de Tio, d'acord?
Let's talk about Tio, okay?
Tio, en castellà.
Dude, in Spanish.
Vinga.
Come on.
Quanta gent hi ha a Catalunya amb el cognom Tio?
How many people are there in Catalonia with the surname Tio?
Cap, igual que Tiet o més de dos?
None, like Uncle or more than two?
O sigui, cap igual que Tiet o més de dos?
So, none like Uncle or more than two?
Més de dos, no?
More than two, right?
Més de dos, jo diria.
More than two, I would say.
És la resposta tan...
It's the answer so...
I la resposta correcta és...
And the correct answer is...
Doncs mira, n'hi ha concretament 504.
Well, look, there are specifically 504.
Bravo!
Bravo!
90 a 40, amics.
90 to 40, friends.
M'esteu dient...
You are telling me...
Pot ser que sigui més fàcil.
It may be easier.
Hi ha més de 500 tios de cognoms i menys de 80 amics?
Are there more than 500 guys with last names and fewer than 80 friends?
Correcte.
Correct.
Exacte, estàs a Catalunya o no et penses que estàs?
Exactly, are you in Catalonia or do you think you are not?
Segons l'IDESCAT, eh?
According to IDESCAT, right?
Casa Tio.
Uncle's House.
Clar, pot ser.
Sure, it can be.
Segons l'IDESCAT, eh?
According to IDESCAT, right?
Potser ens estan timant amb les respostes.
Maybe they are misleading us with the answers.
90 punts al marcador dels Tiet.
90 points on the Tiet scoreboard.
40 punts al marcador dels amics.
40 points on the friends' scoreboard.
Jo voldria dir-los que els amics que ho estan fent molt bé,
I would like to tell them that the friends who are doing very well,
tenint en compte que les proves d'equip les estem guanyant totes nosaltres,
considering that we are winning all the team tests, we are
que som un cap menys,
that we are one less head,
pensant, doncs està molt bé com ho estem fent.
thinking, so it's very good how we are doing it.
Bueno, aquest concurs no està dissenyat per gent que no pensa.
Well, this contest is not designed for people who do not think.
Clar, a la que penses una mica, ja perds.
Of course, once you think about it for a bit, you lose.
Anirem a publicitat i tornarem amb la prova estrella.
We will go to advertising and return with the star test.
Tornarem amb el diòptries,
We will return with the diopters,
que crec que mereix que aquesta última edició de diòptries valgui 50 punts.
I believe that this last edition of diòptries deserves to be worth 50 points.
Uf, quins nervis.
Phew, what nerves.
I casualment, casualment...
And casually, casually...
La diferència de punts.
The difference in points.
Sí, se l'emporten els amics de les arts.
Yes, the friends of the arts are taking it away.
Els amics de les arts empatarien el marcador amb els Tiet, casualment.
Els amics de les arts would tie the score with the Tiet, coincidentally.
D'acord?
Okay?
Per tant, petitíssima pausa.
Therefore, a tiny pause.
De seguida tornem amb el desenllaç de diòptries.
We'll be right back with the outcome of diopters.
La radionovela de Catalunya.
The radio play of Catalonia.
Quina emoció.
What a thrill.
Fins ara.
Until now.
Quins nervis.
What nerves.
És el final, apocalipsi ja.
It's the end, apocalypse already.
Trindem fort tots plegats.
Let's all trim hard together.
Anem cap a l'abans.
Let's go back to the past.
L'apocalipsi del matí de Catalunya Ràdio.
The apocalypse of the morning on Catalunya Ràdio.
Amb Elisenda Carod.
With Elisenda Carod.
El matí de Catalunya Ràdio.
The morning of Catalunya Ràdio.
Aquest estiu planeja la Roca Village i viu la teva experiència a l'aire lliure.
This summer plan the Roca Village and live your outdoor experience.
Un nou village amb noves firmes de moda com Adidas, Missoni, Etnia Barcelona, American Vintage,
A new village with new fashion brands like Adidas, Missoni, Etnia Barcelona, American Vintage,
amb música, gastronomia i ara amb els millors preus.
with music, gastronomy, and now with the best prices.
Descomptes extraordinaris de fins al 70% sobre el preu original.
Extraordinary discounts of up to 70% off the original price.
Aquest estiu planeja la Roca Village.
This summer plan the Roca Village.
Movistar, però segur a l'arma, s'aporta una alarma que és molt més que una alarma, ara per moltíssim menys.
Movistar, but safe at the weapon, brings an alarm that is much more than an alarm, now for much less.
Per només 9,90 euros al mes fins al 2022 si la contractes abans del 5 d'agost.
For only 9.90 euros a month until 2022 if you contract it before August 5.
I després per 45 euros al mes.
And then for 45 euros a month.
Aprofita la superoferta d'estiu amb botigues Movistar o trucant al 900 226 600.
Take advantage of the summer super offer with Movistar stores or by calling 900 226 600.
N'hi ha que col·leccionen segells i d'altres són col·leccionistes de vida.
Some collect stamps and others are collectors of life.
Caçadors que surten a buscar-la, que saben que cal esprimer-la abans que s'escapi.
Hunters who go out to find her, who know that she must be squeezed before she escapes.
I quan s'escapi, tornar a perseguir-la.
And when she escapes, start chasing her again.
I no aturar-se mai.
And never stop.
Si la vida és un viatge, que sigui el millor de la teva vida.
If life is a journey, may it be the best journey of your life.
Del 14 de juliol al 31 d'agost, un Audi A1 Sportback pot ser teu per 210 euros al mes i entrada de 6.545 euros.
From July 14 to August 31, an Audi A1 Sportback can be yours for 210 euros a month and a down payment of 6,545 euros.
Time to live, time to Audi.
Time to live, time for Audi.
Consulta en les condicions a Audi.es.
Consult the terms at Audi.es.
Sabies que un 40% dels incendis són ocasionats per descuits o negligències?
Did you know that 40% of fires are caused by carelessness or negligence?
Hi ha factors de perill com la manca de pluja o l'estat de la vegetació.
There are risk factors such as lack of rain or the state of the vegetation.
Però també tenen un gran pes l'activitat humana i el canvi climàtic.
But human activity and climate change also have a great impact.
Per això cal que administracions i ciutadania assumim un compromís.
For this reason, it is necessary for administrations and citizens to make a commitment.
La prevenció contra els incendis no comença a l'estiu, sinó que dura els 365 dies de l'any.
Fire prevention does not start in the summer; it lasts 365 days a year.
Davant de qualsevol indici de foc, truca al telèfon d'emergències gratuït 112.
In case of any sign of fire, call the free emergency number 112.
Diputació de Barcelona, Catalunya 2030. Generalitat de Catalunya.
Barcelona Provincial Council, Catalonia 2030. Government of Catalonia.
Qui t'agrada més? El mic, els 5 segons, la mosca o el cargol?
Who do you like more? The mic, the 5 seconds, the fly, or the snail?
O potser ets amic de tots?
Or maybe you are friends with everyone?
Sigui quin sigui el teu preferit, posa't la samarreta del mic, els 5 segons, la mosca o el cargol
Whatever your favorite is, put on the mic shirt, the 5 seconds, the fly or the snail.
i a partir d'ara sereu amics.
And from now on you will be friends.
A la venda només a la botiga de TV3.
On sale only at the TV3 store.
L'apocalipsi del matí de Catalunya Ràdio.
The apocalypse of the morning of Catalunya Ràdio.
Amb Elisenda Caró.
With Elisenda Caró.
13 minuts i mig perquè arribi l'apocalipsi final,
13 minutes and a half until the final apocalypse arrives,
moment en què sonarà una bomba o vàries i es ressarà amb tots nosaltres.
moment when a bomb or several will sound and it will be prayed with all of us.
Avui en aquest apocalipsi final estem jugant amb els tiets
Today in this final apocalypse we are playing with the uncles.
i amb els amics de les arts que han fet aquesta meravella de tema junts,
and with the friends of the arts who have created this wonderful piece together,
per favor, el nostre himne de l'estiu.
Please, our summer anthem.
A veure, Albert, fes-me la quadra amb una tornada que és meravellosa.
Let's see, Albert, give me the verse with a refrain that is wonderful.
Aviam.
Let's see.
Tiets, 90 punts, Xavi, sigues benvingut a l'Estudi 2.
Uncles, 90 points, Xavi, welcome to Studio 2.
Què tal, com estem?
How are you doing?
Hem enviat l'Oriol Adal.
We have sent Oriol Adal.
Hola, rei.
Hello, king.
Hola.
Hello.
Ferran, benvingut a l'Estudi 2.
Ferran, welcome to Studio 2.
Ai, ai, ai.
Oh, oh, oh.
Hola.
Hello.
A dalt hi tenim en Dani i en Joan Enric.
Up there we have Dani and Joan Enric.
Ara els hem desterrat a l'estudi número 5.
Now we have exiled them to studio number 5.
40 punts als amics de les arts, 90 als tiets.
40 points to the friends of the arts, 90 to the uncles.
I anem a l'última prova,
And we're going to the final test,
la prova més memorable de l'apocalipsi, que es diu així.
the most memorable proof of the apocalypse, which is called that.
Avui, últim capítol de Diòptries.
Today, the last chapter of Diòptries.
Avui, la gran obra mestra de l'apocalipsi tindrà el seu desenllaç.
Today, the great masterpiece of the apocalypse will have its conclusion.
Ja estic plorant.
I'm already crying.
Perquè en l'últim capítol...
Because in the last chapter...
Vam tenir un gir molt important.
We had a very important turn.
Què tal, Televista?
How are you, Televista?
Hòstia puta!
Holy shit!
Què passa, Rosaura?
What's wrong, Rosaura?
Ai, la mare que em va parir!
Oh, the mother who gave birth to me!
He recuperat l'Evister!
I have recovered the Evister!
Glòria, glòria!
Glory, glory!
Moment de resoldre aquest Diòptries.
Time to solve these Dioptries.
Avui valdrà 50 punts.
Today it will be worth 50 points.
Podeu votar a través del nostre Instagram, arrebapocalipsi.cr,
You can vote through our Instagram, arrebapocalipsi.cr,
pels amics de les arts o pels tiets.
for the friends of the arts or for the uncles.
Qui interpreti millor s'emportarà 50 punts.
Whoever performs best will take 50 points.
Només recordar-vos que els amics van perdent per 50.
Just a reminder that friends are losing by 50.
D'acord que us regalem.
Agreed that we are giving you.
No direm qui fa quin personatge.
We won't say who plays which character.
Us ho direm al final,
We will tell you at the end.
perquè avui hi ha moltes sorpreses
because today there are many surprises
en aquest últim capítol de Diòptries.
in this last chapter of Dioptries.
Diòptries.
Diopters.
La radionovel·la de Catalunya.
The radio novel of Catalonia.
Una història d'amor impossible.
An impossible love story.
La radonovel·la de Catalunya.
The radonovella of Catalonia.
Hola, mama.
Hello, mom.
Desgraciat, que no eres mort?
Unfortunate, aren't you dead?
Em vaig morir de forma sobtada,
I died suddenly,
però al final l'havia refensat
but in the end I had rethought it
i no podia faltar l'últim capítol de Diòptries.
And I couldn't miss the last chapter of Diòptries.
Però què hi ha, aquest imbècil?
But what is it, this idiot?
M'he dit, deixa't caure,
I've told myself, let yourself fall,
que ara no pots fallar en un dia tan especial.
that now you can't mess up on such a special day.
M'estàs dient que has ressuscitat
Are you telling me that you have resurrected?
només per venir a remenar la cua a l'últim Diòptries
just for coming to wag the tail at the last Dioptries
i no per veure ta mare?
And not to see your mother?
Bàsicament per sortir als crèdits.
Basically to get into the credits.
Mira, Tomàs, al final has demostrat
Look, Tomàs, in the end you have proven
que ets com ton pare,
you are like your father,
l'imbècil d'en Josep Garcia.
the idiot Josep Garcia.
Així que al final era cert, oi?
So in the end it was true, right?
El meu Josep
My Joseph
és el pare del decrèpit del Tomàs.
He is the father of the decrepit Tomàs.
Doncs mira, Rosaura,
Well, look, Rosaura,
ja és hora que sàpigues la veritat.
It's time for you to know the truth.
En Josep i jo vam tenir una aventura, sí.
Josep and I had an affair, yes.
I després vaig néixer jo,
And then I was born.
que em vaig morir als 10 anys
that I died at the age of 10
per no tenir l'aparença física
for not having the physical appearance
d'un avi de 96.
of a 96-year-old grandfather.
No tens vergonya, Conxita?
Aren't you ashamed, Conxita?
No, bueno, anem per feina.
No, well, let's get to work.
Ens despullem ja i fem la dansa de la fertilitat.
We undress now and do the fertility dance.
Calla, imbècil!
Shut up, idiot!
I ara, quipotes,
And now, you little rascals,
provar la nostra pau.
prove our peace.
No ho sé, Mari Carmen, joder!
I don't know, Mari Carmen, damn it!
Diòctris havia de ser-hi.
Diòctris had to be there.
Agafeu-me, que no responc.
Pick me up, I’m not responding.
Oh, papa! El meu papa!
Oh, dad! My dad!
Ai, Josep!
Oh, Josep!
Josep, no he aconseguit oblidar-te
Josep, I haven't managed to forget you.
ni un sol dia a la meva vida!
not a single day in my life!
Conxita, però si la setmana passada
Conxita, but if last week
estaves amb un senyor amb bigoti.
you were with a man with a mustache.
Ah, però pensava en tu, Josep.
Ah, but I was thinking of you, Josep.
Doncs jo no puc deixar de pensar en tu, Rosaura.
Well, I can't stop thinking about you, Rosaura.
Mari Carmen, escolta'm, treu-les, grispetes.
Mari Carmen, listen to me, take them out, little greys.
Treu-les tu, que jo no vull perdre
You take them out, because I don't want to lose.
ni un segon d'aquest desenllaç.
not a second of this outcome.
Mira, Josep, tu vas perdre,
Look, Josep, you lost,
totes les oportunitats del món
all the opportunities in the world
d'estar amb mi, Rosaura Ballús,
to be with me, Rosaura Ballús,
quan vas encetrillar
when did you screw up
amb la carnissera del Mercat del Ninot.
with the butcher from the Mercat del Ninot.
Diu-vos quan!
He tells you when!
Això sí que no!
Absolutely not!
Sóc la carnissera del Mercat del Ninot, eh?
I am the butcher from the Mercat del Ninot, right?
Encara em tremola les cames
My legs are still shaking.
com un badella que va adonar-se en Josep Astros.
like a fool who realized Josep Astros.
És que a sobre ens ho ve a refragar per la cara.
It's just that on top of that, he's rubbing it in our faces.
I calla, concita, que també tens part de la culpa.
Shut up, Concita, you are also partially to blame.
Escolta, Rosaura,
Listen, Rosaura,
jo a tu t'estimo molt
I love you very much.
perquè ets com una segona mare per mi,
because you are like a second mother to me,
però a la mama no li parlis així.
but don’t talk to mom like that.
Mira, Tomàs, la Rosaura,
Look, Tomàs, the Rosaura,
no pot parlar així a qui li doni la gana,
you can't talk like that to whoever you want,
que ja ha perdut prou, pobret.
he has already lost enough, poor thing.
Per culpa teva, Josep!
Because of you, Josep!
Ja em perdonareu, eh?
You'll have to forgive me, okay?
Però mangui't que la pesca salada
But eat it up because of the salted fish.
que avui és l'últim capítol del diòtrec.
that today is the last chapter of Diotrephes.
Sí, és que sí, carnissera, la vida és així, tu.
Yes, it is, butcher, that's just how life is, you.
Avui som les grans estrelles de la radiodifusió catalana
Today we are the big stars of Catalan broadcasting.
i demà unes foguetes rotes.
And tomorrow some broken fireworks.
Doncs em sembla molt injust, eh?
Well, it seems very unfair to me, eh?
Les nadies que he tingut per sortir a la novel·la
The nobodies I've had to go out in the novel.
i no heu trucat mai.
and you have never called.
Sí, sobrequeixa't.
Yes, complain about it.
Agafeu-me, que encara li esgarraperé la cara.
Grab me, or I'll scratch his face.
Sí, senyores, hi hagi pau.
Yes, ladies, let there be peace.
He portat un tortallet per endolcir la batllada.
I have brought a little cake to sweeten the gathering.
Ja te'l pots fotre pel maletí, el tortallet, Josep.
You can shove it up your suitcase, the little tort, Josep.
Per cert, Mari Carmen,
By the way, Mari Carmen,
moltes felicitats, que avui és el teu sant.
many congratulations, today is your name day.
Ai, tant que ho és, eh?
Oh, so it is, huh?
Moltes felicitats, eh?
Many congratulations, huh?
Quina il·lusió, moltes felicitats, teta.
What excitement, congratulations, auntie.
Vine aquí, que te bunyeu, tatona.
Come here, you're being silly, you goof.
Com us haig de dir que jo no celebro el sant,
How should I tell you that I do not celebrate the saint,
que sóc un vampir?
Am I a vampire?
Home, doncs és una llàstima,
Well, then it's a shame,
perquè jo he vingut aquí a felicitar-te
because I have come here to congratulate you
expressament des del Vallès.
expressly from Vallès.
La mare que em va parir.
The mother who gave birth to me.
Què putes li passa a la Mari Carmen?
What the hell is wrong with Mari Carmen?
Sembla que li pugen els colors a la cara, papa.
It seems that the colors are rising to his face, dad.
Si és el que em penso,
If it's what I think,
és molt normal que se'n rejolin.
It's very normal for them to get upset.
Ai, tant que ho és,
Oh, how true it is,
que és el senyor del Vallès
what is the lord of Vallès
amb qui la Mari Carmen
with whom Mari Carmen
hi manté relacions sexuals des de fa un any, Rosaura.
Yes, he has been having sexual relations for a year, Rosaura.
No l'havíem vist mai, Conxita.
We had never seen her, Conxita.
Ai, doncs està com un buburet de proliner, eh?
Oh, so he's like a little proliner bug, huh?
M'hi vaig a presentar ara mateix.
I'm going to introduce myself right now.
No vas enlloc, tu, carnissera.
You’re not going anywhere, you butcher.
Des de luego, carnissera,
Of course, butcher,
que no saps tenir la vagina sense activitat, eh?
you can't keep the vagina inactive, can you?
Bueno, la carnissera marcat del dinot és una pantera.
Well, the butcher marked by the dinosaur is a panther.
Bueno, la carnissera serà una pantera,
Well, the butcher will be a panther,
però la meva Mari Carmen és un repenat preciós, tu.
but my Mari Carmen is a beautiful sweetheart, you.
Ai, hi ha d'haver gustos per tot, esclar.
Oh, there must be tastes for everything, of course.
Ah, amb la Mari Carmen ens vam conèixer durant el confinament.
Ah, I met Mari Carmen during the lockdown.
Jo vaig sortir a autolar com cada nit i a volar una estona.
I went out to autolaunch like every night and to fly for a while.
Doncs jo era al balcó fumant un rosli
Well, I was on the balcony smoking a rosli.
i de cop veig a l'horitzó un animal que havia disparat cap a mi.
And suddenly I see on the horizon an animal that had shot towards me.
Jo anava pensant en les meves coses de vampir
I was thinking about my vampire things.
i no me'n vaig adonar que m'acostava perillosament al balcó.
and I didn't realize that I was getting dangerously close to the balcony.
Ai, i jo he de confessar que en aquell moment em vaig espantar.
Oh, and I have to confess that at that moment I got scared.
Vaig agafar la pancarta on posava tot a anir a bé
I took the banner that said everything would be alright.
i la vaig enrotllar i vaig picar el morro de la Mari Carmen
I rolled her and kissed Mari Carmen on the lips.
i just quan la tenia a sobre...
and just when I had her on top...
Vaig quedar estabornida del mastegot.
I was stunned by the blow.
Em va entendrir, la vaig socórrer,
It softened me, I helped her,
ens vam mirar als ulls i vam fer l'amor tota la nit.
We looked into each other's eyes and made love all night.
I des d'aleshores que som nòvios.
And since then we have been a couple.
Ai, Mari Carmen, per si això no ens ho havies explicat mai...
Oh, Mari Carmen, as if you had never told us this...
És que em feia molta pena.
I felt really sorry for him/her.
Però per què t'ha de fer pena?
But why should you feel sorry for him/her?
Sí, és una història molt bonica.
Yes, it is a very beautiful story.
Sí, com el Vallès, no hi ha res...
Yes, like the Vallès, there is nothing...
Sí, una nit de sexe sempre és una meravella.
Yes, a night of sex is always a wonder.
Una nit de sexe amb un vampir que és com un zombi a males.
A night of sex with a vampire that is like a zombie at its worst.
Compro.
I buy.
Em feia molta pena dir-vos que després de 754 anys...
I was very sorry to tell you that after 754 years...
Marxo de Brut i 64 per anar a viure al Vallès.
I'm leaving Brut and 64 to go live in Vallès.
I will always love you.
I will always love you.
Les tetes es queden de pedra
The breasts turn to stone.
i pel seu cap passen infinitat de records viscuts amb la Mari Carmen.
And countless memories lived with Mari Carmen pass through his mind.
Les execucions gratuïtes amb la Magnum Parabellum del calibre nou.
Free executions with the Magnum Parabellum of the new caliber.
La facilitat per despullar-se, el seu odi constant.
The ease of undressing, his constant hatred.
Ai, però, Mari Carmen,
Oh, but, Mari Carmen,
la menteta, no t'ha de fer gens de pèl, això.
The little lie shouldn't bother you at all.
Nosaltres estarem molt bé.
We will be very well.
Com hem d'estar bé si he recuperat la bit, oi, Conxita?
How are we supposed to feel good if I've recovered the bit, right, Conxita?
I tant, Rosaura.
Of course, Rosaura.
Mari Carmen, si has de trobar l'amor, vés i ensfruta'l.
Mari Carmen, if you have to find love, go and enjoy it.
Ai, mira, al final ens fareu plorar.
Oh, look, in the end you'll make us cry.
I jo venia a veure si tenia sort i arreplegava un senyor.
And I came to see if I was lucky and picked up a gentleman.
Doncs, carnicera, si a vostè li fa el pes,
Well, butcher, if it suits you,
abans de morir-me un altre cop, tinc temps per una refregada.
Before I die again, I have time for a quickie.
Doncs no se'n parli més.
Then let’s not talk about it anymore.
Anem a la parada, aquí tinc un sota, els cala que veuràs.
Let's go to the stop, here I have a sweater, the ones you'll see.
Adéu.
Goodbye.
Adéu, fill, ja vindré d'Urtaflosa.
Goodbye, son, I will come back from Urtaflosa.
No se mentiri.
I won't lie.
Adéu, mama.
Goodbye, mom.
I tu què, Josep, què penses fer?
And what about you, Josep, what do you plan to do?
Si la Rosaura no em vol, crec que aniré passant,
If Rosaura doesn't want me, I think I'll just move on.
que m'he deixat el gas incès.
I left the gas on.
Josep, jo t'he estimat durant molts anys,
Josep, I have loved you for many years,
però ara sóc una dona nova i m'he obert el Tinder.
but now I am a new woman and I have opened Tinder.
Crec que ja formes part del meu passat.
I believe you are already part of my past.
Entesos, Rosaura.
Understood, Rosaura.
Al final això nostre ha estat una història d'amor impossible.
In the end, this of ours has been a story of impossible love.
És la vida, Josep.
It's life, Josep.
Adéu, Rosaura.
Goodbye, Rosaura.
Jo vaig al bar a fer una aigua amb gas.
I am going to the bar to have a sparkling water.
T'espero, Mari Carmen.
I’m waiting for you, Mari Carmen.
I així com les setes es queden soles
And just as the arrows are left alone
al menjador del tercer primera,
in the dining room of the third first,
de la finca cita al carrer Brusi 64.
from the property located at Brusi Street 64.
Ai, tetes, quin capítol, ai.
Oh, breasts, what a chapter, oh.
Ja ho pots fer amb mi, Rosaura.
You can do it with me now, Rosaura.
Abans de marxar, escolteu una casa.
Before leaving, listen to a house.
M'ajudareu a desfer-me de tots els cadàvers del replà, no?
You will help me get rid of all the corpses in the landing, right?
Ui, sí, sí, sí, que amb aquesta calor ja fa una horeta.
Oh, yes, yes, yes, with this heat it's been about an hour already.
Però abans voleu fer-la per última vegada?
But do you want to do it one last time first?
Bona idea. Conxita, fem-la.
Good idea. Conxita, let's do it.
Fem-la, fem-la, tetes. Fem-la.
Let's do it, let's do it, breasts. Let's do it.
I així com les tetes es despullen
And just as the breasts are bared
i perpetren la dança de la fertilitat,
and they carry out the dance of fertility,
tot desitjant que la Mari Carmen
wishing that Mari Carmen
marxi al Vallès a viure
go live in the Vallès
una història d'amor possible.
a possible love story.
Seran felices? Segur que sí.
Will they be happy? Surely yes.
Aquest ha estat l'últim capítol de Diòptries.
This has been the last chapter of Diòptries.
Bravo!
Well done!
Pinet, la puta!
Pinet, the whore!
Mestreza!
Mastery!
Grande!
Great!
Mestreza, espectacular, aquest últim capítol de Diòptries.
Mastery, spectacular, this last chapter of Diòptries.
Tinc la pell de gallina,
I have goosebumps,
la Xarli està plorant.
Xarli is crying.
Quin millor final per aquest apocalipsi final
What better ending for this final apocalypse
que aquest Diòptries.
that this Dioptries.
Pineda, teta, t'hi has tret les entranyes, eh?
Pineda, sweetheart, you've taken out your guts, huh?
Ha sigut bonic, eh?
It has been beautiful, hasn’t it?
Mira la Xarli, ja no podrà tornar a parlar.
Look at Xarli, he won't be able to speak again.
Preciós.
Precious.
I us he de dir una cosa.
I have to tell you something.
També t'ho diem, Xarli.
We also tell you, Xarli.
Fill de puta.
Son of a bitch.
No ho havia dit mai, això, quina antena.
I had never said this, what an antenna.
Perdó.
Sorry.
Escolteu, a veure, que em reconstrueixi.
Listen, let's see, that I reconstruct myself.
Aquest Diòptries ha estat espectacular,
This Diòptries has been spectacular,
però els tiets i els amics de les arts...
but the uncles and friends of the arts...
Això, això.
That, that.
Tetes?
Tits?
Això, jo no m'imaginava...
I didn't imagine that...
Vull dir, tants personatges entrant i sortint...
I mean, so many characters coming in and out...
Fem una cosa.
Let's do something.
Emocionem-nos un altre cop.
Let's get excited again.
I un aplaudiment pels amics!
And a round of applause for the friends!
Bravo, bravo.
Bravo, bravo.
Ho han fet increïble.
They have done it incredibly.
Ha estat espectacular.
It has been spectacular.
El ritmasso que portaven.
The rhythm they had.
Estan més que preparadíssims, eh?
They are more than ready, right?
Per fer un musical com faran.
To make a musical like they will.
El moment que ha entrat en escena de carnisser
The moment he entered the scene as a butcher.
era del 19.
It was the 19th.
Ferran, d'on has tret aquesta carnisser?
Ferran, where did you get this butcher?
No ho sé, faig com vosaltres, no penso gaire.
I don't know, I do like you, I don't think much.
I funciona, tetes, funciona, el no pensar gaire.
It works, tits, it works, not thinking too much.
Escolteu, 50 punts en joc
Listen, 50 points at stake
amb aquest últim Diòptries de l'apocalipsi final,
with this latest Dioptries of the final apocalypse,
arroba apocalipsi CR,
at symbol apocalypse CR,
podeu votar a través de l'Instagram
you can vote through Instagram
pels amics de les arts o pels tiets.
for the friends of the arts or for the uncles.
Gilibets, com van en aquests moments?
Gilibets, how are things going at this moment?
Amb petadets, com sempre.
With little kisses, as always.
39 a 61.
39 to 61.
Jo no és amb petadets, tio.
I'm not with little farts, dude.
M'has empatat, eh?
You tied me, huh?
Bueno, depèn amb qui ho compari.
Well, it depends on who you compare it with.
Sí, clar.
Yes, of course.
Jo crec que avui l'audiència hauria de ser soberaníssima
I believe that today the audience should be absolutely sovereign.
i decidir que hi hagi un empat
and decide that there should be a tie
i acabar amb un refragament aquí entre tots,
and to end with a reaffirmation here among all of us,
que, bueno...
that, well...
Depèn, depèn.
It depends, it depends.
Qui guanya, segons l'audiència?
Who wins, according to the audience?
Doncs, de moment, estan guanyant els amics de les arts.
Well, for now, the friends of the arts are winning.
Ara!
Now!
Doncs va, tanquem-ho aquí,
Well then, let's close it here.
perquè així 50 punts als amics de les arts...
because that way 50 points to the friends of the arts...
El target de l'Instagram.
The target of Instagram.
Fem un recompte de marcadors,
Let's do a count of markers,
perquè la cosa està molt interessant.
because the thing is very interesting.
90 punts al marcador dels amics de les arts,
90 points on the scoreboard of the friends of the arts,
90 punts als amics dels tiets,
90 points to the aunts' friends,
i us dic una cosa,
and I tell you something,
aquí s'acaba l'apocalipsi,
here the apocalypse ends,
aquí s'acaba l'apocalipsi final,
here ends the final apocalypse,
empatats els marcadors,
tied the scores,
i avui no ha mort ningú per causa nostra,
and today no one has died because of us,
sinó que morirem tots gràcies a l'apocalipsi.
but we will all die thanks to the apocalypse.
Ara, ara!
Now, now!
Per tant, comencem!
Therefore, let's start!
Estimats tiets,
Dear uncles,
gràcies per venir a concursar,
thank you for coming to compete,
avui, que us vagi molt bé el concert...
today, I hope the concert goes very well for you...
Moltíssimes gràcies!
Thank you very much!
Que us reanimin amb algun xute,
May they revive you with some shot,
perquè esteu a punt de morir.
because you are about to die.
Una frase per acomiadar-vos del món?
A phrase to say goodbye to the world?
Una frase per...
A phrase for...
Poder a Espanya.
Power in Spain.
Ja està, ja l'he dit.
That's it, I've said it.
Tira la bomba!
Throw the bomb!
Amics de les arts,
Friends of the Arts,
moltíssimes gràcies per estar tots tres
thank you very much for being all three of you
per segona vegada consecutiva,
for the second consecutive time,
igual que els tiets,
just like the uncles,
en aquesta apocalipsi.
in this apocalypse.
Us salveu de l'apocalipsi momentàniament,
You save yourselves from the apocalypse momentarily,
perquè a la una palmarem tots.
because at one o'clock we will all die.
Una última frase per acomiadar-vos?
One last sentence to say goodbye?
Salut i bolos.
Cheers and gigs.
Gilibets, estimat,
Gilibets, dear,
avui, l'honor,
today, the honor,
et deixem una última frase per acomiadar-te del món.
we leave you with a final sentence to bid farewell to the world.
Doncs, sobretot, que visqui l'amor.
Well, above all, long live love.
Sempre amor.
Always love.
Oh!
Oh!
Gilibets!
Gilibets!
Pineda, el teu torn.
Pineda, your turn.
Que has fet un plaer i que us menjo el cul.
That you have made a pleasure and that I eat your ass.
Oh!
Oh!
Gràcies.
Thank you.
Pined la bomba.
Pined the bomb.
Però no vagis molt lluny, Charlie.
But don't go too far, Charlie.
Doncs, mira, jo que vinc de treballar sola fent stand-up,
Well, look, I come from working alone doing stand-up,
gràcies per haver-me ensenyat que en equip tot és millor
thank you for teaching me that everything is better as a team
i que sou unes fies de puta.
And you are a bunch of whores.
Uau!
Wow!
Bomba.
Bomb.
Gràcies a tot l'equip de Catalunya Ràdio,
Thanks to the entire team at Catalunya Ràdio,
als 848 concursants,
to the 848 contestants,
però, sobretot, a tres persones.
but, above all, to three people.
Elisenda Pineda, Charlie P,
Elisenda Pineda, Charlie P,
Oriol Gilibets,
Oriol Gilibets,
com dirà la Charlie,
as Charlie will say,
sou la polla!
you are awesome!
I l'Albert Joda!
And Albert Joda!
El món no s'acaba,
The world does not end,
però l'apocalipsi sí.
but the apocalypse does.
Fins setembre. Adéu, adéu.
Until September. Goodbye, goodbye.
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