Festa final

Catalunya Ràdio, Catalunya Àudio, som podcast.

Catalonia Radio, Catalonia Audio, we are podcast.

Ciutadans i ciutadanes del món, benvingudes i benvinguts a La Família.

Citizens of the world, welcome to The Family.

Avui, programa especial des de la Llama Estor,

Today, special program from the Llama Estor,

de coses boniques i millors persones.

of beautiful things and better people.

Un aplaudiment per tota la gent que ha vingut a aquest programa.

A round of applause for all the people who came to this program.

La Família!

The Family!

Live, La Família!

Live, The Family!

Bravo!

Bravo!

Oh, quina emoció, quina emoció.

Oh, what excitement, what excitement.

Després de tantes setmanes, Maria i Germán, Juanjo Sáez,

After so many weeks, Maria and Germán, Juanjo Sáez.

un aplaudiment per ells també.

A round of applause for them too.

Bona tarda, moltes gràcies.

Good afternoon, thank you very much.

Bravo!

Bravo!

Màquines.

Machines.

Qué aforo, qué aforo.

What capacity, what capacity.

Molt a prop, Juanjo, aquí.

Very close, Juanjo, here.

Es que me da cosa tocarlo por el COVID, el micro.

I'm worried about touching the microphone because of COVID.

Qué aforo tiene esta sala.

What is the capacity of this room?

300.253 persones.

300,253 people.

Y hay gente fuera.

And there are people outside.

I hi ha gent fora esperant.

And there are people outside waiting.

S'ha quedat moltíssima gent a fora que estan protestant.

A lot of people are outside protesting.

I estan cremant coses.

And they are burning things.

Tenim vídeos, després...

We have videos, then...

Una ira comprensible, d'altra banda, perquè tothom va estar aquí.

A understandable anger, on the other hand, because everyone was here.

Absolutament, absolutament.

Absolutely, absolutely.

Insistim, des de la Llama Estor, agraïm moltíssim a la gent de la Llama Estor,

We insist, from Llama Estor, we are very grateful to the people of Llama Estor.

que són gent molt maca, gent que ho posa molt fàcil,

they are very nice people, people who make things very easy,

tenen una botiga preciosa, ells són encantadors,

they have a lovely shop, they are charming,

i de veritat que val molt la pena que vingueu un dia.

And it's really worth it for you to come one day.

I avui tenim convidats especials,

And today we have special guests,

tenim gent entre el públic que volem saludar.

We have people in the audience that we want to greet.

Gràcies.

Thank you.

Ara saludarem els nostres convidats especials,

Now we will greet our special guests,

però abans de res us diré que avui,

but first of all, I will tell you that today,

entre tota la gent que heu volgut venir,

among all the people who wanted to come,

els que no, no, per tant no us foteu,

those who don't, don't, so don't bother.

però els que heu volgut venir a acompanyar-nos avui a la família,

but those of you who wanted to come and accompany us today as a family,

sortejarem això que tinc aquí.

We will raffle this that I have here.

Oh, oh, cuidao.

Oh, oh, watch out.

És un paper de plata que obro,

It's a silver paper that I open,

i a sota hi ha un plat,

and underneath there is a plate,

i el sorteig en directe avui.

and the live draw today.

Sortegem crack.

We raffle off a star.

Mira, mira, mira.

Look, look, look.

Aquest és el soroll del paper de plata,

This is the sound of aluminum foil,

que jo obro, i és una plata meravellosa.

that I open, and it is a wonderful dish.

A veure, croquetes de la meva mare.

Let's see, my mother's croquettes.

Croquetes de la mama.

Mom's croquettes.

Bravo a tot el públic.

Bravo to all the audience.

Bravo.

Bravo.

Bravo, bravo.

Bravo, bravo.

Croquetes de la família.

Family croquettes.

Home, els premis que fan il·lusió.

Home, the awards that inspire joy.

Puedo hacer un paréntesis?

Can I take a break?

Sí, sí, parla, parla, parla.

Yes, yes, speak, speak, speak.

Está tu hijo ahí que está debajo de la silla ya.

Is your son there who is already under the chair?

O sea, cada vez veo que se está escondiendo más.

I mean, every time I see that he/she is hiding more.

Maravillós.

Wonderful.

El pobre Pep está...

Poor Pep is...

Va, la cosa va de família,

Come on, it's a family matter.

per tant, les croquetes de la família,

therefore, the family croquettes,

si em permeteu,

if you allow me,

i ja que la tenim aquí,

And since we have it here,

anirem saludant a tota gent que ha anat venint

We will greet all the people who have been coming.

i que ens acompanyava,

and that accompanied us,

jo saludaré, i que parli un moment,

I will greet, and let him speak for a moment,

sisplau, la meva mare,

please, my mother,

que és qui ha fet les croquetes.

who is the one that made the croquettes.

Bravo.

Bravo.

La cosa...

The thing...

que li fa vergonya, però no tanta.

that it makes him ashamed, but not too much.

Si no sé, no vengo.

If I don't know, I won't come.

Primer, abans de res, explica'ns les croquetes

First, before anything else, tell us about the croquettes.

de què són, com estan fetes.

What they are, how they are made.

Bueno, pues hi ha dies que les faig

Well, there are days when I make them.

amb pernil molt bo,

with very good ham,

i aquest dia no és avui, precisament.

and this day is not today, precisely.

No, hoy...

No, today...

Hoy ha puesto el barato.

Today he/she has put the cheap one.

Ha puesto el barato.

He has lowered the price.

És que has volgut estalviar, precisament, avui.

It's just that you wanted to save, precisely, today.

Jo tenia croquetes fetes pel Pep,

I had croquettes made by Pep,

pel nen,

for the boy,

i tu vas dir una idea

and you said an idea

que potser podien servir unes croquetes.

that perhaps some croquettes could be served.

I vaig pensar, doncs mira, ja les tinc fetes.

I thought, well look, I already have them done.

Ja les tinc fetes.

I already have them done.

Ah, m'estàs dient que en el meu fill

Ah, you are telling me that in my son

les dues croquetes han pernil del dolent.

the two croquettes have bad ham.

Maravallós, la història de la meva mare.

Wonderful, the story of my mother.

Gràcies.

Thank you.

Tarda de confessions.

Afternoon of confessions.

Recordem que la meva mare,

Let us remember that my mother,

ho hem explicat alguna vegada,

we have explained it some time.

la meva mare es diu Mari,

my mother's name is Mari,

li hem dit sempre Mari a casa,

we have always called her Mari at home,

no li hem dit ni mama ni mare ni res,

we haven't told him/her anything, neither mum nor mother nor anything.

i es feia dir Assun en una època de la vida.

And she was called Assun at one time in her life.

Això és meravellós.

This is wonderful.

Té un alter ego.

He has an alter ego.

Llavors té una època que la gent la saluda com a Assun.

Then there is a period when people greet her as Assun.

Però s'ho va inventar, eh?

But he made it up, right?

Tu vas por la calle de la mano de tu mare

You walk down the street holding your mother's hand.

i deia, hombre, Assun.

And I said, man, Assun.

Exacte.

Exactly.

I jo pensava, de qui anava?

And I was thinking, who was it about?

I tu què amagues?

And what are you hiding?

Tenim passaport i tot, vull dir...

We have a passport and everything, I mean...

Tenim documentació duplicada?

Do we have duplicate documentation?

Va pensar que era el mateix nom, sí.

He thought it was the same name, yes.

És disléxica, tu mare.

She's dyslexic, your mother.

Ella fa el que...

She does what...

Sempre ha fet el que li dóna la gana.

He has always done whatever he feels like.

Explica-li a la policia, no?

Tell the police, right?

Assun, això?

Assume this?

No, no, jo al revés.

No, no, I on the contrary.

Poseu-vos les piles.

Get energized.

La gent que heu vingut aquí avui a la família,

The people who have come here today to the family,

perquè aquestes croquetes, que en són moltes,

because these croquettes, which are many,

i són del pernil del bo, com heu pogut comprovar,

and they are from the good ham, as you could check,

només les podreu guanyar

you can only win them

si feu una frase que comenci per

if you make a sentence that starts with

Us estimo, família, perquè...

I love you, family, because...

I llavors, un eslògan bonic.

And then, a beautiful slogan.

Us estimo, família, perquè m'alegreu molt la vida

I love you, family, because you make my life very happy.

o perquè el Juanjo m'agrada molt

or because I like Juanjo a lot

i vosaltres dos us tolero, però el Juanjo m'agrada molt.

I tolerate both of you, but I really like Juanjo.

Per exemple, una plantilla.

For example, a template.

Però penseu-hi i després repassarem

But think about it and then we will review.

qui vulgui dir una frase

who wants to say a sentence

i qui es vulgui endur una frase.

And anyone who wants to take a phrase with them.

Aquestes croquetes haurà de currar-s'ho.

These croquettes will have to work for it.

Moltes gràcies. Aquestes són les croquetes.

Thank you very much. These are the croquettes.

Saludem després...

We'll greet later...

M'encanta que estiguin a la butaca.

I love that they are in the armchair.

Estan aquí.

They are here.

Saludem avui els nostres convidats,

We greet our guests today,

que són l'Ignasi Taltavull i la Raquel.

who are Ignasi Taltavull and Raquel.

Com estem?

How are we?

Bravo!

Bravo!

La graderia en la fila, 87.

The grandstand in row 87.

Exacte.

Exact.

La Raquel i l'Ignasi.

Raquel and Ignasi.

L'Ignasi, que abans ho dèiem,

Ignasi, as we mentioned earlier,

la història de l'Ignasi

the story of Ignasi

amb La Ruïna, per exemple,

with La Ruïna, for example,

ja sabeu que és un podcast

You already know what a podcast is.

que podeu escoltar a tot arreu.

that you can hear everywhere.

És Spotify, bàsicament,

It's basically Spotify.

que és la gent on us escolta.

what is the people where you are heard.

Va començar aquí, no?

It started here, didn't it?

Va començar aquí.

It began here.

I jo, de fet, no actuava aquí

And I, in fact, was not acting here.

des de prepandèmia.

since pre-pandemic.

Vull dir, que és una sensació

I mean, it's a feeling.

com emocionant, una mica,

how exciting, a little,

d'haver tornat a aquesta escenària,

of having returned to this scenario,

a més, en el mateix racó on sella.

furthermore, in the same corner where he/she seals.

Meravellós, meravellós.

Wonderful, wonderful.

I ara estàs pendent d'una actuació...

And now you are waiting for a performance...

Això m'agrada molt,

I like this a lot.

perquè veieu la vida dels artistes?

Why do you see the lives of artists?

Sí.

Yes.

És envejable.

It is enviable.

Per exemple, ara,

For example, now,

en quin punt estàs de cara a l'actuació?

What stage are you at in preparation for the performance?

De demà a Bilbao.

From tomorrow in Bilbao.

Ara estic buscant a Twitter

Now I am looking on Twitter.

Urcullo Restricciones,

Urcullo Restrictions,

cada cinc minuts,

every five minutes,

perquè hem de sortir en aquest moment

why do we have to go out at this moment

per la tarda,

in the afternoon,

i segons el que decideixin,

and depending on what they decide,

doncs demà actuem o no.

So are we performing tomorrow or not?

Directament.

Directly.

Meravellós.

Wonderful.

Sí, sí, segons les restriccions d'aforament,

Yes, yes, according to the capacity restrictions,

sabré si demà actuo a Bilbao,

I will know if I am performing in Bilbao tomorrow,

o vaig a Bilbao,

I am going to Bilbao,

perquè ja tinc els vols i hotel,

because I already have the flights and hotel,

i vaig allà, doncs, a passejar.

I go there, then, to take a walk.

Vaig a conèixer la ciutat.

I am going to know the city.

Fa molt bon temps, a més, ara, el gener.

The weather is very nice, besides, now, in January.

És una època maca

It's a beautiful time.

per anar allà a mullar-se.

to go there to get wet.

Espera que no provessin passejar.

I hope they don't try to take a walk.

Bé, potser sí, potser sí.

Well, maybe yes, maybe yes.

Jo també.

Me too.

He après a escriure l'endacari, per exemple.

I have learned to write the endacari, for example.

Meravellós.

Wonderful.

Una cosa que no pensava haver de fer mai.

One thing I never thought I would have to do.

Haig d'intercalar-la, recordo.

I need to intersperse it, I remember.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Com si cremés alguna cosa a la boca,

As if something were burning in the mouth,

l'endacari.

the lehendakari.

L'endacari.

The president.

I la Raquel, què tal, Raquel, com estàs?

And Raquel, how are you, Raquel, how are you?

Hola, Roger, hola, Juanjo, hola, Maria.

Hello, Roger, hello, Juanjo, hello, Maria.

Hola, mare de Juanjo.

Hello, Juanjo's mother.

No, no, no.

No, no, no.

No, la mare del Roger.

No, Roger's mother.

Perdona, i també hi ha la mare de...

Sorry, and there is also the mother of...

La mare de la Maria.

Maria's mother.

La Maria.

The Maria.

Hola, hola, hola.

Hello, hello, hello.

Tot queda en família.

Everything stays in the family.

Bravo.

Bravo.

Xaro, xaro.

Joke, joke.

Xaro, xaro, eh?

Xaro, xaro, eh?

Ho estàs corregint tu, eh, la teva mare?

Are you correcting it yourself, huh, your mother?

Xaro, xaro.

Xaro, xaro.

Escolta, amb la Maria, amb aquesta veu melodiosa...

Listen, with Maria, with that melodious voice...

Potser has dit alguna cosa al Pep, també, a tu, hijo.

Maybe you've said something to Pep, as well, to you, son.

Pep, Pep, està bé que...

Pep, Pep, it's okay that...

El Pep, imagina't si li interessa

Pep, imagine if he's interested.

que està ara mateix el meu fill d'11 anys,

that my 11-year-old son is right now,

està veient TikTok amb uns cascos.

He is watching TikTok with headphones.

Amb uns cascos.

With some headphones.

Saps aquells senyors que van...

Do you know those gentlemen who go...

No estàs buscant informació sobre Orkullu?

Aren't you looking for information about Orkullu?

Potser per fer-me un favor, no?

Maybe to do me a favor, right?

Aquells senyors que van al teatre i miren el futbol?

Those gentlemen who go to the theater and watch football?

Perquè la dona diu...

Because the woman says...

Anem al teatre.

Let's go to the theater.

Anem al teatre, però ell vol veure el futbol?

Let's go to the theater, but does he want to watch football?

Que mai passa a la inversa, no?

That never happens in reverse, right?

Hi ha ningú al Camp Nou que s'ha posat una òpera, eh?

Is there anyone at Camp Nou who has put on an opera, huh?

No passa això.

This doesn’t happen.

Ni al Cyrano de Bergerac.

Nor in Cyrano de Bergerac.

No.

No.

Tampoc, no?

Neither, right?

Doncs segueix, fill meu.

So go on, my son.

Tu, eh, gaudeix de la teva preadolescència

You, hey, enjoy your preadolescence.

i ja et deixem en pau.

And we leave you in peace.

Nada, Pep, todo bien.

Nothing, Pep, all good.

El Juanjo ens ha acompanyat a fer una volta abans amb el Pep.

Juanjo accompanied us for a walk earlier with Pep.

Sí, hemos ido a...

Yes, we have gone to...

¿Cómo se llama la juguetería que huele a chicle?

What is the name of the toy store that smells like gum?

Dreams.

Somnis.

Els Dreams patrocina aquest podcast, per casualitat.

The Dreams sponsors this podcast, by coincidence.

Dreams, y después hemos ido a tiendas de compro oro.

Dreams, and then we went to gold buying shops.

Clar.

Sure.

Quina mena de viatge, no?

What a kind of trip, right?

No havies encontrat el que buscàveis en el Dreams, no?

You hadn't found what you were looking for in Dreams, had you?

Ha sigut un poco fuerte, porque había un...

It has been a bit intense because there was a...

Al Pep le ha interesado una cosa en concreto,

Pep has been interested in one specific thing,

que era un micro de oro, no?

that it was a gold microphone, right?

Hombre, claro.

Man, of course.

Un colgante de micro de oro con pedrería, no?

A gold micro pendant with gemstones, right?

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

I esa persona que tuve que vender ese collar, no?

And that person to whom I had to sell that necklace, right?

Exacto.

Exact.

Quin moment, no?

What a moment, right?

Ni carrera en el rap, al final no ha ido tan bien.

Neither a career in rap, in the end it hasn't gone so well.

Hi ha un raper molt trist a Brooklyn, ara mateix.

There is a very sad rapper in Brooklyn right now.

Potser em vaig emocionar amb la meva etapa de raper.

Maybe I got carried away with my time as a rapper.

Sí.

Yes.

Així estem, això és la família.

This is how we are, this is the family.

Primer hauria hagut de triomfar i després comprar-me aquest collaret.

First, they should have triumphed and then bought me that necklace.

Exacte, quan el rei ho veia, és com...

Exactly, when the king saw it, it's like...

Però tu no has cantat mai, no?

But you have never sung, have you?

Jo no t'he sentit que...

I haven't heard you that...

No, però es comença per la lupa.

No, but it starts with the magnifying glass.

Tinc un equip.

I have a team.

Clar, clar.

Sure, sure.

Doncs així estem, així estem.

Well, that's how we are, that's how we are.

La Raquel, no sé si porta espanjolls de...

Raquel, I don't know if she has Spanish shoes from...

Tu ets la més jove d'aquí, ara mateix, de tots nosaltres?

Are you the youngest here, right now, of all of us?

Crec que sí, però bueno, t'intentàvem, no?

I think so, but well, we were trying, weren't we?

Això ja no sé jove.

I don't know that anymore, young man.

A mi ja m'han retirat el carnet jove, no?

They have already taken my youth card away, right?

Ja, si no ho saps...

Yes, if you don't know...

Crec que sí, no?

I think so, don't I?

No ho sé.

I don't know.

En mi época nació el carnet jove.

In my time, the youth card was created.

Imagina't! Cuidao!

Imagine that! Watch out!

En mi generación fuimos los primeros.

In my generation, we were the first.

Esto es muy guapo.

This is very cool.

Era como una tarjeta que hacían ellos.

It was like a card that they made.

El Juanjo, com el meu fill, li estava explicant tot de coses

Juanjo, like my son, was explaining everything to him.

d'atracaments de la seva època de kinky,

of the robberies from her kinky time,

en el barrio, con un pinxo...

in the neighborhood, with a kebab...

Jo, quan he vist que buscava el compro oro,

I, when I saw that I was looking for the buy gold,

digo, aquí l'hi voy a contar, jo, per cert.

I say, here I am going to tell you, me, by the way.

Va, llegim una mica qui són els nostres convidats,

Come on, let's read a little about who our guests are,

que són l'Ignasi i la Raquel.

who are Ignasi and Raquel.

Ja sabeu que a la família els hi demanem que ho escriguin ells,

You know that we ask the family to write it themselves,

i això ho fa una mica més personal.

and this makes it a little more personal.

La Maria, com és que...

Maria, how come that...

Com dèiem, la seva veu melodiosa.

As we were saying, her melodious voice.

La filla de la Charo.

Charo's daughter.

Charo!

Charo!

Ah, li fa vergonya, també.

Ah, he is/ she is embarrassed, too.

Qui és Ignasi Taltavull, segons ell mateix?

Who is Ignasi Taltavull, according to himself?

Vaig néixer a Barcelona el 88.

I was born in Barcelona in '88.

El meu pare va treballar tota la vida

My father worked his whole life.

en una empresa de majoristes de merceria,

in a haberdashery wholesaler company,

el qual vol dir que vaig tenir mitjons gratis

which means I got free socks

durant molts anys.

for many years.

Ma mare va cuidar de nosaltres i va fer feines d'hostaleria.

My mother took care of us and worked in hospitality.

Sempre li ha agradat molt la ràdio i l'humor,

He has always loved radio and humor very much,

així que aquest interès pels mitjans

so this interest in the media

m'ha vingut d'aquí.

It has come to me from here.

També tinc una germana més petita que jo,

I also have a younger sister than me.

que és DJ i toca la bateria,

he is a DJ and plays the drums,

que per tant m'eclipsa en el del molar als sopars familiars.

that therefore eclipses me in the molar at family dinners.

Clarament.

Clearly.

És una aplaudiment per l'Ignasi.

It's a round of applause for Ignasi.

Per la germana de l'Ignasi, que és la que mola.

For Ignasi's sister, who is the cool one.

Clarament.

Clearly.

Sembla que es diu Maria.

It seems that her name is Maria.

La Maria.

Maria.

Maria!

Maria!

Està treballant.

He/She is working.

Jo també estic treballant.

I am also working.

Un moment, però...

One moment, but...

DJ i bateria...

DJ and drums...

Hi ha posat així...

He has put it like this...

DJ i bateria...

DJ and drums...

Però quants germans sou?

But how many siblings are you?

Vull parlar de germans, dos.

I want to talk about brothers, two.

Sí, som nosaltres dos.

Yes, it's just the two of us.

No pots guanyar un altre germà, tu, llavors.

You cannot win another brother, you, then.

És més jove i, clar, jo pensava

He is younger and, of course, I thought

que això de l'humor farà que sigui popular

that this humor will make it popular

i cada sopte és com...

and every night is like...

No, jo toco la bateria.

No, I play the drums.

No li interessa res del que faig.

He is not interested in anything I do.

No passa res.

It's nothing.

És una història trista.

It's a sad story.

És una història de superació, però mitjons gratis durant molts anys.

It is a story of overcoming, but free socks for many years.

Què et sembla això?

What do you think of this?

Jo no sabia el que gustaven els mitjons fins fa un parell d'anys.

I didn't know how much I liked socks until a couple of years ago.

Quan el pare es va jubilar va ser com...

When dad retired it was like...

Potser m'he d'anar a comprar jo.

Maybe I should go shopping myself.

Aviam, aviam.

Let's see, let's see.

El teu pare...

Your father...

Treballava en una merceria.

I worked in a fabric shop.

Sí, exacte.

Yes, exactly.

Llavors, majorista...

Then, wholesaler...

Punto Blanco.

White Point.

Punto Blanco?

White Point?

No, és un majorista de...

No, it's a wholesaler of...

Com que anaves sortint a diferents...

As you were going out to different...

Vull dir, teníem diversos gèneres...

I mean, we had various genres...

Multimarca.

Multibrand.

No, no, és que no és una marca, diguéssim.

No, no, it's just that it's not a brand, let's say.

És una empresa...

It is a company...

Multimarca.

Multibrand.

Llavors, clar, quan s'obreva gènere,

Then, of course, when gender is opened,

doncs a casa, doncs avui hi ha mitjons.

Well, at home, because today there are socks.

El millor pels fills, eh?

The best for the children, right?

Les croquetes, el pernil bo...

The croquettes, the good ham...

Els millors mitjons...

The best socks...

Jo no sabia, jo de petit pensava que...

I didn't know, when I was small I thought that...

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

Això...

This...

Els pares...

The parents...

Tots els pares donàvem mitjons als seus fills.

All the parents gave socks to their children.

Era gratuït, el servei de mitjons era gratuït a totes les cases.

It was free, the sock service was free in all the houses.

I després, com no, jo me'ls compro jo.

And then, of course, I'll buy them myself.

O els ponies una vegada i els tiràveis, no?

Or you would put them on once and throw them away, right?

A l'Oroco...

At the Oroco...

Amb l'en Lluís XIV.

With Louis XIV.

Se'n tenien cigarros amb els mitjons, però...

They had cigars with the socks, but...

Un culleret d'odor de mitjons.

A teaspoon of sock smell.

Però jo tenia mitjons en una època

But I used to have socks at one time.

com que podia portar un any seguit mitjons

as I could wear socks for a whole year

sense rentar-los mai.

without ever washing them.

O sigui, és com de...

That is, it's like...

Cada dia uns...

Every day some...

Vull dir, una quantitat de mitjons immenses.

I mean, an enormous amount of socks.

És com molt de Lluís XIV, no?

It's very much like Louis XIV, isn't it?

Ui, loco, no?

Wow, crazy, right?

Acabes no valorant-ho, oi?

You don't really value it, do you?

Els tenies emparellats i tal, o no et preocupaven, això?

Did you have them paired up and all, or were you not worried about that?

No, perquè eren com el mateix model.

No, because they were like the same model.

O sigui, eren com, no sé, 100 mitjons del mateix model.

That is, there were like, I don't know, 100 socks of the same model.

I era com...

It was like...

I calzoncilles, també.

And underpants, too.

I calzoncilles, també, però calzoncilles era més difícil que llegaren.

And underpants, too, but underpants were harder to read.

Calzoncilles no eren tan buscades.

Underwear was not so sought after.

És que és com de magnat, però de baixa intensitat, no?

It's like being a magnate, but low-key, right?

Magnat dels mitjons.

Sock magnate.

Sí, la centricitat de Jeff Bezos, no?

Yes, Jeff Bezos's centricity, right?

Que mai repeteix mitjons, mai repeteix mitjons.

Who never repeats socks, never repeats socks.

A casa nostra, el meu pare treballava en un bar

At our house, my father worked in a bar.

i llavors sobraven croissants i dònuts.

And then there were leftover croissants and donuts.

I també la mateixa sensació de el dònut és gratis.

And also the same feeling that the donut is free.

És més, el dònut es fa malbé perquè el cap...

Moreover, the donut spoils because the head...

I sobraven dònuts.

And there were leftover donuts.

I s'anava a menjar.

He/She was going to eat.

Nene, come teló.

Kid, come curtain.

Come teló.

Like a curtain.

El nen ja pesava 300 quilos, ja, i llavors deia, ja no comes més.

The boy already weighed 300 kilos, yes, and then he said, don’t eat anymore.

Va, qui és la Raquel?

Come on, who is Raquel?

La Raquel Herbàs és qui digui la Maria que és.

Raquel Herbàs is whoever Maria says she is.

Raquel Herbàs, 1991, còmica i persona humana.

Raquel Herbàs, 1991, comedian and human being.

Està aquí perquè un dia els seus pares van voler tenir descendència

He is here because one day his parents wanted to have offspring.

i va sortir regolint-s'hi.

and went out dripping.

Comparteix la seva vida amb el seu nòvio, el seu gat, el seu gos

Shares her life with her boyfriend, her cat, and her dog.

i la seva família.

and his family.

I la seva terapeuta.

And her therapist.

Treballa, l'està passant, a vegades a la fàbrica de Rufián

He works, he is spending it, sometimes at Rufián's factory.

i una vegada va acompanyar el seu pare a collir l'oliva.

And once he accompanied his father to collect the olives.

Una?

One?

Una vegada només.

Only once.

Per què una?

Why one?

Perquè això és duríssim, va ser una i no més, en tot i tot.

Because this is really tough, it was one and only one, in everything.

Però per què tan duró, eh?

But why so tough, huh?

És duríssim, és duríssim.

It's very hard, it's very hard.

Tranquil·la, tranquil·la, relaxa't.

Calm down, calm down, relax.

Per què t'hi va portar el teu pare?

Why did your father take you there?

Cuenta'ns, cuenta'ns.

Tell us, tell us.

Per què t'hi va portar el teu pare?

Why did your father take you there?

Perquè és en invierno.

Because it is in winter.

Perquè el meu pare té com...

Because my father has like...

Això en català no s'ho diu, bancades?

Is this not called "bancades" in Catalan?

Sabeu bancades?

Do you know about banked?

Bancades, un bancades, un cachotierra.

Bancades, a banked area, a mudslide.

Sí, cachotierra, cachotierra, sí, dona, parla en urna,

Yes, earthworm, earthworm, yes, woman, speak in a jar,

que s'entengui, gràcies.

Let it be understood, thank you.

El terreno, el terreno.

The land, the land.

Nosaltres tenim oliveres, que es diu en el bacete.

We have olive trees, which is called in the bacete.

Al cony de tot arreu es diuen oliveres, eh?

Everywhere they are called olive trees, right?

Sí, bueno, perquè a Múrcia es diuen olivos,

Yes, well, because in Murcia they are called olives,

però a la família es diu oliveres.

but in the family, it is called oliveres.

Bueno, olivera, olivera.

Well, olive tree, olive tree.

Són oliveratenientes.

They are olive landowners.

D'aquella franja, d'aquella franja.

From that strip, from that strip.

Bueno, són quasi terratenientes.

Well, they are almost landowners.

No tenim tanta terra per ser terratenientes.

We don't have enough land to be landowners.

Bancal teniente.

Lieutenant bank.

Minitenientes, minitenientes.

Mini lieutenants, mini lieutenants.

Tenientes, sí.

Lieutenants, yes.

Sí, m'està apassionant aquesta història, seguim, seguim.

Yes, I am really enjoying this story, let's continue, let's продолжить.

I llavors cada any es fa la bullita de l'oliva

And then every year the olive boiling is done.

per fer l'oli de l'any.

to make the oil of the year.

És en enero, en enero.

It's in January, in January.

En gener, desembre, sí, quan fa fred, saps?

In January, December, yes, when it's cold, you know?

O sigui, juny o quan tu fes de la tarda.

So, June or whenever you were free in the afternoon.

No, no, no, ara ha de fer molt de fred, molt de fred.

No, no, no, now it has to be very cold, very cold.

I has de madrugar moltíssim.

You have to wake up very early.

Moltíssim, moltíssim, moltíssim.

Very, very, very much.

Per què? Si l'oliva no se'n va.

Why? If the olive doesn't go away.

No, però s'ha de començar amb...

No, but you have to start with...

L'oliva està quieta.

The olive is still.

És una tradició ancestral.

It is an ancestral tradition.

L'oliva està quieta.

The olive is still.

Sí, no sé, és una tradició ancestral.

Yes, I don't know, it's an ancestral tradition.

Una cosa que jo l'altre dia...

One thing that I the other day...

Perdó, un incís.

Sorry, a digression.

Oliva o aceituna?

Olive or black olive?

Jo tinc...

I have...

Jo soc de la que diu oliva.

I am one of those who say olive.

Sempre.

Always.

Jo sempre.

Me always.

Però això és una discussió monumental.

But this is a monumental discussion.

La discussió monumental, que és el meu programa.

The monumental discussion, which is my program.

La discussió monumental.

The monumental discussion.

Les dues Espanyes, sí, sí.

The two Spains, yes, yes.

Però allà, on sou vosaltres, no us diu mai aceituna enlloc?

But there, where you are, does it never call you olive anywhere?

Crec que sí, que molta gent ho diu,

I think so, a lot of people say it.

però nosaltres diem oliva.

but we say olive.

Gente desviada.

Deviant people.

És en vostro bancal, ja està, que diu oliva.

It's in your garden, that's it, that says olive.

No tinc ni puta idea.

I have no fucking idea.

Quina història, estic supernerviós, vale.

What a story, I'm super nervous, okay.

Llavors, em va portar un dia en plan rollo entera,

Then, one day she took me out like a complete vibe.

teno que seguir.

I have to continue.

Nena, ara vas a veure el que has treballat,

Girl, now you are going to see what you have worked on,

no has de riure i...

you shouldn't laugh and...

Exactament.

Exactly.

I em va portar i va ser com va, de molt guai.

It brought me and it was really cool.

La terra.

The earth.

Nunca més.

Never again.

Mai més.

Never again.

Però què, perdona, la imatge que hem de tenir

But what, excuse me, the image we have to have

és la de gent a sota de l'olivera amb un pal picant?

Is it the one with people under the olive tree with a sharp stick?

Sí, exactament.

Yes, exactly.

I després, perquè això és una mica masclista,

And then, because this is a bit sexist,

és els homes fan...

it's the men who do...

L'edan con el garrote a l'oliva

The eel with the stick at the olive.

i les dones estan ajupides a la terra

and the women are crouched on the ground.

recollint les olives que s'escaven fora de la manta.

collecting the olives that fall outside of the blanket.

La feina pesada, no?

The heavy work, right?

Que fa mal a l'esquena, que està allà...

It hurts the back, it's there...

Que no et pots ni desfogar,

That you can't even vent,

perquè està allà fotent-li amb el bastó...

because he/she is over there hitting it with the stick...

Perquè s'ha de tenir molta cura, s'ha de saber molt bé,

Because you have to be very careful, you have to know very well,

perquè si et rompe la trama, total, que no.

because if it breaks the plot, well, no.

Que no m'agrada.

I don't like it.

No, nunca más.

No, never again.

I a més no pots eixar-te ni una a la boca

And besides, you can't even let one slip out of your mouth.

perquè estan malíssimes.

because they are very bad.

A mi no m'agraden, eh?

I don't like them, ok?

Bueno, però estan males, de l'arbol.

Well, but they are bad from the tree.

No, en aquell moment no es poden...

No, at that moment they cannot...

No, no, i en aquell moment ni a la vida.

No, no, and at that moment not in life.

Les olives estan dolentes.

The olives are bad.

Aquí és un trauma.

Here is a trauma.

És un trauma familiar.

It's a family trauma.

Estan molt mal.

They are very sick.

Estan males, de l'arbol.

They are bad, from the tree.

Un cop tractades, ja d'igual que la tractis molt bé,

Once treated, it doesn't matter how well you treat it.

molt malament l'oliva...

very bad the olive...

Raquel, crec que és el teu trauma,

Raquel, I think it's your trauma.

del dia aquell que vas anar amb les olives,

of that day you went with the olives,

perquè les olives estan dolentíssimes.

because the olives are very rotten.

Bueno, tranquil·la, home, tranquil·la.

Well, calm down, come on, calm down.

Ja ho parlarem amb el terapeuta

We'll talk about it with the therapist.

que forma part de la teva família.

that is part of your family.

A mi hi ha una cosa que m'ha inquietat molt.

There is one thing that has troubled me a lot.

A veure, qual?

Let's see, which one?

Que compartís terapeuta.

What a shared therapist.

No se puede.

It cannot be done.

Com a qui?

Like who?

No, no, no.

No, no, no.

No ho compartim terapeuta.

We don't share it, therapist.

La Raquel comparteix la vida amb el seu nòvio,

Raquel shares her life with her boyfriend,

el seu gat, el seu gos i la seva terapeuta.

her cat, her dog, and her therapist.

Ah, tu et pensaves que compartia terapeuta amb qui?

Ah, did you think I shared a therapist with whom?

Amb el seu nòvio.

With her boyfriend.

No, no, no.

No, no, no.

Ah, amb l'Ignasi.

Ah, with Ignasi.

Aquí cadascú té el seu, eh?

Here everyone has their own, right?

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

Qui té terapeuta, tothom?

Who has a therapist, everyone?

A veure, aixequem la mà.

Let's see, raise your hand.

En aquesta sala?

In this room?

Oh, quina colla de bojos!

Oh, what a bunch of crazy people!

Visca la teràpia!

Long live therapy!

Hi ha gent que no, eh, però...

There are people who don't, you know, but...

Aquí no va teràpia.

Here there is no therapy.

A veure, otra vez, por favor.

Let's see, again, please.

Qui hauria d'anar? La meva mare.

Who should go? My mother.

No, no, què va.

No, no, what are you talking about?

Escolta, hi ha gent que no ha aixecat la mà en cap de les dues?

Listen, is there anyone who hasn't raised their hand in either of the two?

Què passa aquí?

What is happening here?

Aquesta gent no sap...

These people don't know...

Perquè són els terapeutes, com diu l'Aran Martín.

Because they are the therapists, as Aran Martín says.

Ui, els terapeutes són els que més teràpia necessiten, eh?

Oh, therapists are the ones who need therapy the most, right?

Nois, fem una aturada al camí,

Guys, let's take a break on the way,

després ara seguirem parlant de germans,

then now we will continue talking about siblings,

de la família, de la Raquel

of the family, of Raquel

i els seus traumes,

and their traumas,

de l'Ignasi i els seus mitjons,

of Ignasi and his socks,

però avui tenim un programa especial en directe,

but today we have a special live program,

ja ho sabeu aquí, la família,

you already know here, the family,

a la Llama Estor, i volem saludar

to the Llama Estor, and we want to greet

el que vindria a ser, Juanjo,

what would come to be, Juanjo,

el Quinto Vítel.

the Fifth Vitellius.

El Quinto Vítel.

The Fifth Veal.

La persona que li dona vida

The person who gives him life.

a això que gravem, perquè nosaltres ho gravem

to this that we record, because we record it

a pèl, i després ell li posa les músiques,

bare, and then he adds the music to it,

li fa la mescla,

it makes the mixture for him/her,

fa coses que jo no entenc, fa màgia.

It does things that I don't understand, it does magic.

Hace màgia.

Make magic.

Com el George Martin feia amb els Beatles,

Like George Martin did with the Beatles,

aquelles cançons que eren normaletes,

those songs that were just average,

i ell ho feia molt bé.

And he did it very well.

Se me oye que graba en unas condiciones.

I hear that he/she records in certain conditions.

Tu que grabes, el teu micro és com un perrito muerto, no?

You who are recording, your mic is like a dead puppy, right?

Yo se engaño. Yo básicamente se engaño.

I deceive myself. I basically deceive myself.

El Juanjo té un peluche connectat a un iPad

Juanjo has a stuffed toy connected to an iPad.

i amb això

and with that

em fa veure que tira.

it makes me see that it throws.

L'animal està dissecat, fa com una caixa de ressonància.

The animal is dissected, it acts like a resonating box.

Hoy voy a confesar que es de atrezo el micro,

Today I'm going to confess that the microphone is a prop,

de verdad, no lo enchufo,

Honestly, I don't plug it in.

lo he enchufao.

I have plugged it in.

El dijo, mira, mira, tengo el peluche, eh?

He said, look, look, I have the stuffed animal, huh?

Cuando me decís, ¿lo tenéis conectado?

When you ask me, do you have it connected?

Digo, sí.

I mean, yes.

I el Gerard Sapaña, un aplaudiment, sisplau,

And Gerard Sapaña, a round of applause, please.

pel Gerard Serra.

for Gerard Serra.

Avui amb nosaltres, el Quinto Vítel

Today with us, Quinto Vitel.

de la família.

of the family.

Bueno, Gerard, a tu t'arriben coses,

Well, Gerard, you hear things,

t'arriben unes pistes separades,

you receive some separate clues,

unes juntes, tu em vas dir coses

you told me things during a meeting

que jo no vaig entendre en cap moment,

that I did not understand at any moment,

me les vas explicar.

You are going to explain them to me.

Crec que a poc a poc has anat pillant una mica la maqueta.

I think you have gradually been getting the hang of the model.

No saps exportar PDFs.

You cannot export PDFs.

PDF, però...

PDF, but...

PDF és el més fàcil.

PDF is the easiest.

Doncs m'envia captures de pantalla del PDF.

So send me screenshots of the PDF.

Oh!

Oh!

Gràcies per compartir-ho, Gerard.

Thank you for sharing it, Gerard.

Això és de ser ultra boomer, no?

This is very boomer, isn't it?

És que jo, si ja quan diu exportar

It's just that I, if when it says export.

ja no sé què vol dir.

I no longer know what it means.

A ver, Roger, ajuntar documento, no?

Let's see, Roger, combine the document, right?

Esto, ajuntar archivo.

This, attach file.

Es lo del clip, no?

It's about the clip, isn't it?

Es una persona que a 2022 té un correu hotmail.

He is a person who in 2022 has a hotmail email.

Eh!

Hey!

Algú té un correu hotmail aquí?

Does anyone here have a hotmail email?

No, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no.

Estic sol!

I am alone!

No, no, aixeca...

No, no, get up...

No, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no.

Qui té Yahoo?

Who has Yahoo?

Qui té Yahoo com el Juanjo?

Who has Yahoo like Juanjo?

Yahoo?

Yahoo?

Yahoo, algú té Yahoo?

Yahoo, does anyone have Yahoo?

La mare de Roger té Yahoo.

Roger's mother has Yahoo.

Bueno, escolteu, escolteu, el Gerard,

Well, listen, listen, Gerard,

moltíssimes gràcies, de veritat.

thank you very much, really.

Volem agrair tota la feina que fas,

We want to thank you for all the work you do,

obscura, que la gent no sap

dark, that people do not know

que és aquesta màgia que li dones

What is this magic that you give him/her?

en aquests programes que gravem

in these programs that we record

així al loco.

to the crazy one.

I tu li dones aquest xarme

And you give him this charm.

i aquesta...

and this...

Moltes gràcies, de veritat.

Thank you very much, really.

És molt emocionant.

It's very exciting.

Jo encantat d'ajudar.

I am happy to help.

L'única que sí que m'agradaria demanar, sisplau,

The only thing I would like to ask, please,

si hi ha una segona temporada,

if there is a second season,

en Juanjo, un micro nou, per favor.

Juanjo, a new microphone, please.

Si us plau.

Please.

Ah, perquè tu saps que nosaltres sonem bé i ell no.

Ah, because you know that we sound good and he doesn't.

Clar, clar, o sigui,

Of course, of course, that is,

sembla que estigueu en dimensions paral·leles,

it seems like you are in parallel dimensions,

en segles diferents.

in different centuries.

Jo pensava que estigués en una cueva, no?

I thought I was in a cave, right?

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Estic aquí.

I am here.

Pensa que és un tio que acaba de vendre

Think that he is a guy who has just sold.

dos milions de llibres del seu

two million books of his

i no es gasta ni un duro amb res, eh?

And he doesn't spend a dime on anything, huh?

Nada, no hay que guardar.

Nothing, there is nothing to keep.

Para el día de mañana.

For tomorrow.

Vale, va.

Okay, go.

Gràcies, Gerard.

Thank you, Gerard.

No, me compraré uno.

No, I'll buy one.

Un aplaudiment, sisplau, també.

A round of applause, please, as well.

Avui ens acompanya Adam Martín.

Today we are joined by Adam Martín.

El otro, el quinto hit.

The other, the fifth hit.

Això t'ho feien a les mil i una, te'n recordes?

They would do that to you a thousand and one times, do you remember?

Ja, ja ho sé, ja ho sé.

Yeah, yeah I know, I know.

Gràcies per venir.

Thank you for coming.

No, no, jo encantat.

No, no, I'm delighted.

Ja saps que soc una mica part de la família, també.

You know that I am a bit part of the family too.

Absolutament, absolutament.

Absolutely, absolutely.

Soc un pròdic.

I am a prodigal.

Ens falta el fill tonto, que és l'Olivares,

We are missing the dumb son, who is Olivares.

que no ha vingut.

that has not come.

Però ahir el vam veure, el vam anar a veure.

But yesterday we saw him, we went to see him.

Molt bé, eh?

Very good, huh?

Sí, l'heu de veure.

Yes, you have to see it.

L'hem d'anar a veure al Teatre Borràs,

We have to go see him at the Borràs Theatre.

al sopar dels Idiotes.

at the dinner of the Idiots.

Boníssim.

Very good.

Jo no m'ho creia.

I couldn't believe it.

Però què fa?

But what is he/she doing?

És meu aquest tio, fa molt bé.

This guy is mine, he does very well.

Home, clar, no?

Sure, right?

Vam arribar a la conclusió

We came to the conclusion.

i li vam dir quan va sortir del teatre

and we told him when he left the theater

que era idiota perquè no s'ha sabut vendre,

that he was an idiot because he didn't know how to sell himself,

però ell ho fa molt bé, fa molt bé.

but he does it very well, he does it very well.

És d'aquells actors que surten a l'escenari i l'omplen.

He is one of those actors who step onto the stage and fill it.

Bueno, a veure, per raons òbvies,

Well, let's see, for obvious reasons,

però també per qualitats interpretatives, també.

but also for interpretative qualities, too.

Vull dir que molt bé.

I mean very well.

Adam Martín, moltíssimes gràcies per ser amb nosaltres.

Adam Martín, thank you very much for being with us.

Un aplaudiment.

A round of applause.

Pots guanyar les croquetes, també.

You can win the croquettes, too.

David, és un autèntic crac

David is a real genius.

i a dia d'avui segueix sent superinsegur.

And as of today, he is still very insecure.

És increïble.

It's incredible.

El seu pitjon amic, literalment.

His pigeon friend, literally.

També una cosa que fem habitualment

Also, something we do regularly.

és que el Juanjo fa una redacció,

it's just that Juanjo is writing an essay,

ja ho sabeu, que li agrada molt fer-la,

you know that he/she really enjoys doing it,

però avui no l'has fet.

but today you haven't done it.

No m'agrada fer-la.

I don't like to do it.

Què ha passat? Per què no l'has fet avui?

What happened? Why didn't you do it today?

Avui menys, encara.

Today, even less.

Per què?

Why?

Dile-ho a la gent que ha vingut a veure.

Tell it to the people who have come to see.

Perquè això és com el cole,

Because this is like school,

llegir en veu alta és,

reading aloud is,

per allò que m'hacien bullying,

for what they bullied me for,

en el cole.

in school.

I avui ja només faltava aquí,

And today it was just missing here,

davant de la classe,

in front of the class,

perquè això no és un teatre

because this is not a theater

com el que fem veure tot el temps.

as we make it seem all the time.

Sembla que som a una casa del cole

It seems that we are in a school house.

i ara el colmol és el bullying original.

And now the climax is the original bullying.

No, no.

No, no.

No, eh?

No, right?

No, no.

No, no.

I si diem Juanjo, Juanjo,

And if we say Juanjo, Juanjo,

no pots improvisar sobre la marxa o alguna cosa?

Can't you improvise on the go or something?

No, no.

No, no.

A part, llevo unos días

Apart from that, I've been a few days.

que tengo insomnio por las mañanas.

that I have insomnia in the mornings.

Insomnio por las mañanas?

Insomnia in the mornings?

Això és un problema.

This is a problem.

Parlem-ho.

Let's talk about it.

Però no pots dormir a les 11 del matí?

But can't you sleep at 11 in the morning?

Insomnio por los matins?

Insomnia in the mornings?

A las 10 de la mañana me despierto

At 10 in the morning I wake up.

y no puedo dormir ya más.

and I can’t sleep anymore.

Hombre.

Man.

No, no, en serio.

No, no, seriously.

Però si jo pagaria

But if I would pay.

para tener esa sensación.

to have that feeling.

No, pues yo a las 10 de la mañana me despierto

No, because I wake up at 10 in the morning.

y ya, pero con los ojos como platos.

And already, but with eyes like saucers.

Y no puedo dormir

And I can't sleep.

y me pongo la rosel ahora

and I put on the rosel now

porque digo...

because I say...

Y ya no puedes dormir

And you can no longer sleep.

que hasta la noche siguiente ya...

that until the next night already...

Ya no puedo dormir hasta las 12 o así.

I can no longer sleep until 12 or so.

Ah, bueno, que esto es una pesadilla.

Ah, well, this is a nightmare.

Y hoy ya me he cabreado.

And today I've already gotten angry.

Digo, pues mira, a las 11 y media

I say, well look, at half past eleven.

digo, mira, me levanto.

I say, look, I get up.

La verdad es que no sé si pagarlo o riu.

The truth is that I don't know whether to pay it or laugh.

A tomar viento me levanto y digo...

To hell with it, I get up and say...

A ver si haciendo cosas me entra sueño, ¿no?

Let's see if doing things makes me sleepy, right?

Sí, digo, voy a hacer la redacción.

Yes, I say, I am going to write the essay.

Impresionant.

Impressive.

De la redacción y de todo.

From the writing and everything.

Avui ha passat d'autor del Juanjo

Today has passed from the author Juanjo.

en aquest lift La Família.

In this lift, The Family.

Vam preguntar coses sobre germans.

We asked questions about siblings.

Vam fer una altra pregunta

We asked another question.

perquè la primera havia tingut molt d'èxit

because the first had been very successful

i la segona tenia a veure

and the second was related

amb quina era la vostra victòria

with which was your victory

sobre algun dels germans o germanes

about some of the brothers or sisters

que podeu contestar també vosaltres

that you can also answer yourselves

que esteu aquí amb nosaltres

that you are here with us

i la Raquel i l'Ignasi, evidentment, també.

And Raquel and Ignasi, of course, too.

Però la Maria abans ens volia fer

But Maria wanted to make us first.

una mica d'espitx sobre el tema dels germans.

a little bit of insight on the topic of siblings.

Avui que hi ha la Txaro, la té a mà d'aquí.

Today that Txaro is here, she's within reach from here.

Clar.

Sure.

Aprofites per dir-li...

You take the opportunity to tell him/her...

És un missatge indirecte, no?

It's an indirect message, isn't it?

No.

No.

Ah, val, val.

Ah, okay, okay.

Ella ja ho sap, tot això que diràs.

She already knows all of this that you will say.

Més o menys.

More or less.

Sí, totalment.

Yes, absolutely.

El Pep està contra el Maier.

Pep is against Maier.

És que a mi m'agrada bastant

I quite like it.

quan vam fer una crida al programa

when we made a call to the program

de Greatest Hits de tortura fraternal

of Greatest Hits of brotherly torture

perquè jo com a germana petita,

because I, as the younger sister,

que em porto 6 i 8 anys amb els meus germans,

that I am 6 and 8 years older than my siblings,

hi havia coses que em ressonaven.

there were things that resonated with me.

Per exemple, la Joana diu

For example, Joana says

ni confirmo ni desmenteixo

I neither confirm nor deny.

que el meu germà em digués

that my brother told me

que per ser una bona portera

that to be a good goalkeeper

havia d'aprendre a parar pilotes amb la cara.

I had to learn to stop balls with my face.

Maravellós.

Wonderful.

Realment, això de tenir un individu

Really, this thing about having an individual

a les teves mans

in your hands

que no té cap...

that has none...

que no té cap concepte après

that has not learned any concept

i llavors tu li vagis indicant

and then you keep indicating it to him/her

la teva versió interessada del món...

your self-interested version of the world...

Jo sempre perdia l'hotel

I always lost the hotel.

perquè el meu germà em va dir

because my brother told me

el millor és el Taj Mahal

the best is the Taj Mahal

i jo com una maníaca

and I like a maniac

a anar pel Taj Mahal.

to go to the Taj Mahal.

Vull dir, realment,

I mean, really,

té molta incidència el que fa, no?

What he/she does has a strong impact, doesn’t it?

Absolutament.

Absolutely.

El germà amb tu.

The brother with you.

Després l'Eva diu

Then Eva says

es posava la música de la pel·li

she put on the movie's music

de Jesucristo Superstar

of Jesus Christ Superstar

i deia que aquella música

and I said that music

el tornava boig.

it drove him crazy.

I llavors em començava a perseguir

And then it started to chase me.

per tota la casa.

throughout the house.

Això també, la recreació,

This too, the recreation,

diguem-ne, la thriller,

let's call it a thriller,

és una cosa que fan molt els germans grans.

It's something that older siblings do a lot.

Però això, clar,

But this, of course,

és com deixar traumas psicològics.

it's like leaving psychological traumas.

Sí, clar.

Yes, of course.

Això és un tema

This is a topic.

que a la segona, tercera sessió de teràpia

that in the second, third therapy session

ja està present allà.

It's already present there.

Primer ets el fantasma de l'òpera

First you are the phantom of the opera.

i ja em desmaio.

And I'm already fainting.

La teva germana emulant

Your sister emulating

molt més que tu ja,

much more than you already,

a P5.

in P5.

Em perseguia pel pis

It was chasing me around the apartment.

fent de fantasma.

playing ghost.

No, i el Pep diu

No, and Pep says

sóc el petit de 5.

I am the youngest of five.

Hi ha gent que diu

There are people who say

hòstia, no?

Wow, right?

Tens el testimoni del Pep.

You have Pep's testimony.

Ànims.

Keep it up.

Em torturaven fent-me pessigolles

They tortured me by tickling me.

fins a plorar d'impotència, literalment.

to the point of crying out of helplessness, literally.

Ara sóc un adult

Now I am an adult.

que no té pessigolles.

that does not tickle.

I a mi també em passa.

It happens to me too.

Trauma.

Trauma.

A mi també em passa.

It happens to me too.

Un moment.

One moment.

Li han gastat el cos?

Have they worn out his/her body?

M'han gastat les costelles.

They have broken my ribs.

Tu no tens pessigolles, Maria?

Don't you have ticklish spots, Maria?

Jo aquí no tinc pessigolles.

I don't have ticklish spots here.

Bueno, per si un s'ho fa a ell mateix

Well, just in case someone does it for themselves.

no tens pessigolles, eh?

You are not ticklish, huh?

Té un callo aquí.

He has a corn here.

Com la gent que toca la guitarra

Like the people who play the guitar.

que li cau la pell dels dits, no?

that the skin on his fingers is coming off, right?

Al final.

In the end.

Jo tinc com els laterals de cuir.

I have like the leather sides.

O sigui, no tinc...

I mean, I don't have...

Però per què aquests feien els teus germans?

But why were these your brothers doing?

Pessigolles.

Tickles.

Bàsicament.

Basically.

T'afian danyo, bàsicament.

It basically harms you.

Exposició, clar, clar.

Exhibition, clear, clear.

Exposició a intensa pessigolla

Exposure to intense tickling

durant molts anys.

for many years.

Llavors, crec que la gent que hem patit

Then, I believe that the people who have suffered

que som germans petits

that we are little brothers

tenim menys pessigolles.

we have fewer tickles.

Perquè tu, recorda,

Because you, remember,

ets la germana petita de quants?

are you the little sister of how many?

De tres.

Of three.

I et torturàvem bastant, eh?

We tortured you quite a bit, huh?

Clar.

Sure.

Llavors jo he escrit un poema.

Then I have written a poem.

Dius germans grans.

You say big brothers.

Home, espera un moment, un moment.

Wait a moment, a moment.

Ara.

Now.

Reve.

Reve.

Aquí va una Reve Gerard, ja ho saps.

Here goes a Reve Gerard, you already know it.

Germans grans, et diuen que ets adoptat.

Older siblings, they tell you that you are adopted.

Lleva't que ho siguis,

Get up that you are.

llavors que en principi no t'ho diuen.

so they don't tell you at first.

Germans grans, t'utilitzen per quedar

Big brothers, they use you to meet up.

com uns nois sensibles

like sensitive boys

davant de les xatis que els agraden,

in front of the girls they like,

però després no et fan cas.

but then they don't pay attention to you.

Germans grans, mirar-los jugar

Older brothers, watching them play.

és el tuitx de tota la vida.

it's the tweet of a lifetime.

Germans grans, mai els guanyaràs

Big brothers, you'll never win against them.

el Super Mario Kart.

the Super Mario Kart.

I quan això passa et demanen revenja

And when this happens, they ask for revenge.

una vegada i una altra

time and time again

fins que es tranquil·litzen

until they are calm

i veuen que la seva derrota

and they see that their defeat

només era un miratge.

it was just a mirage.

Germans grans, et bategen amb noms

Big brothers, they name you with names.

com Petit Gorda.

like Little Fat.

Germans grans, els principals usurpadors

Big brothers, the main usurpers.

de patates fregides d'Occident.

of Western fries.

Germans grans, perquè no els entenguis

Big brothers, so you don't understand them.

es posen a parlar anglès entre ells,

they start speaking English among themselves,

però un dia se'ls acaba de xollo.

but one day their luck runs out.

Germans grans, dictadors culturals,

Big brothers, cultural dictators,

no els agraden

they don't like them

les Spice Girls

the Spice Girls

i acabes escoltant Gamma Ray

and you ended up listening to Gamma Ray

a cinquè de primària.

fifth grade of primary school.

Germans grans, m'hauria avorrit

Big brothers, I would have been bored.

moltíssim sense ells.

very much without them.

Bravo, bravo.

Bravo, bravo.

Nunca lo entenderé.

I will never understand it.

La relación entre hermanos

The relationship between siblings.

nunca lo entenderé.

I will never understand it.

Aquí el Juanjo es fill únic.

Here Juanjo is an only child.

Las palizas que se pegan.

The beatings they give each other.

Auténticas palizas.

Authentic beatings.

Yo las palizas, los golpes.

I the beatings, the blows.

No te entra al cap, això.

This doesn't get into your head.

Los puñetazos, directamente.

The punches, directly.

Eso nunca lo entenderé.

I will never understand that.

A mi em passa com tu.

It happens to me like it does to you.

Jo també soc filla única.

I am also an only child.

No tinc ni idea d'aquest amor.

I have no idea about this love.

Cabezazos contra la paret.

Headbutts against the wall.

I després...

And then...

T'estimes?

Do you love yourself?

No sé, això ho sabreu vosaltres.

I don't know, you'll know that.

Jo amb el meu germà teníem una indiferença.

My brother and I had an indifference.

Xupar la comida.

Suck the food.

Però tu saps que veig

But you know that I see

que he vingut d'una cárcel de Tailàndia, eh?

that I came from a prison in Thailand, huh?

Jo no em sona.

I don't recognize him/her.

Jo he vist pelees entre hermanos

I have seen fights between brothers.

con cuchillos.

with knives.

Perquè no podia, perquè era petita.

Because I couldn't, because I was small.

Peleas entre hermanos con cuchillos.

Fights between brothers with knives.

¿Con cuchillos?

With knives?

¿En qué presión?

At what pressure?

Cortes con sangre y venir a casa dándose golpes.

Cuts with blood and coming home hitting oneself.

Mi hermano ha matado a mi hermano.

My brother has killed my brother.

No aneu a la sagrera, sobretot.

Don't go to La Sagrera, above all.

Les golpes en la cabeza i ir a l'hospital, eh?

The blows to the head and going to the hospital, huh?

No, mira, és que hi van fer la crida

No, look, it's just that they made the call there.

sobre algunes de les victòries.

about some of the victories.

La Maria n'ha llegit algun, però, per exemple,

Maria has read some, but, for example,

hi ha molta crueltat, com diu en Juanjo,

there is a lot of cruelty, as Juanjo says,

diu en Joan, i van repassant tots els fets d'infància

says Joan, and they are reminiscing about all the childhood events.

i sovint d'adults, i he arribat a la conclusió

and often of adults, and I have come to the conclusion

que totes les baralles entre germans

that all the fights between siblings

de bones a primeres sempre són a mort.

From the outset, they are always to death.

Viscerals i sense rendició ni pietat.

Visceral and without surrender or mercy.

Sí, sí.

Yes, yes.

I segueix dient.

And keep saying.

Fent-me el mort,

Playing dead,

la vaig fer plorar de veritat.

I made her cry for real.

Una gran victòria que vaig assegurar,

A great victory that I secured,

però amb els ulls tancats.

but with closed eyes.

I mirant de no respirar boca tarrosa

And trying not to breathe mouthful.

i fent-li creure...

and making him believe...

La tàctica del lagarto.

The lizard's tactic.

Estoy muerta para que me suelte.

I'm dead for him to let me go.

A mí me parece maravilloso, pero un poco juego de tronos también.

It seems wonderful to me, but a bit like Game of Thrones as well.

Ah, ah, no haciendo...

Ah, ah, not doing...

Muy juicio por combate.

Very trial by combat.

Quan aguantes, no?

When do you hold on, right?

A mi em sembla per això que

It seems to me therefore that

genera moltes...

generates many...

capacitats interpretatives,

interpretative capacities,

el tenir germans.

having siblings.

Totalment.

Totally.

No? Com de...

No? Like what...

Et donen un cop fluix i és...

They give you a light tap and it's...

Ah!

Ah!

I això et fa preparar per la vida

And this prepares you for life.

que al final és fingir tota l'estona.

that in the end is pretending all the time.

De fet, hi ha una cosa que

In fact, there is one thing that

de les poques armes que tenen els germans petits

of the few weapons that younger siblings have

és cridar...

it's calling...

M'està apagant!

It's going out!

Sí, és mentida.

Yes, it's a lie.

Sí, o fins i tot esperar

Yes, or even wait.

que la reacció sigui quan hi ha algú present.

that the reaction occurs when someone is present.

Com que tu no estàs molestant i estàs bé

Since you are not bothering and you are fine.

i de sobte és al cap de deu minuts...

And suddenly it's ten minutes later...

Ah!

Ah!

És com... Per favor...

It's like... Please...

Tengo unas vecinas que siempre decían

I have some neighbors who always used to say.

Me ha hecho mucho daño.

It has hurt me a lot.

Que la perda afecta, no?

That loss affects, right?

Me ha hecho mucho daño.

It has hurt me a lot.

Tu, Adam, quants germans éreu?

You, Adam, how many siblings did you have?

Quatre.

Four.

Quatre, a veure, espera't un moment.

Four, let's see, wait a moment.

Quatre, crec que és el límit.

Four, I think that is the limit.

Algú té més que quatre germans aquí,

Does anyone have more than four siblings here?

en aquesta sala, no?

in this room, right?

I un de més.

And one more.

Quatre també allà.

Four also there.

Encantado, quatre allà.

Nice to meet you, four over there.

Al fondo, cinc!

In the background, five!

Sí, cinc!

Yes, five!

Guerra, guerra!

War, war!

Molt bé, molt bé, anem a...

Very well, very well, let's go to...

Tu ets el que no té pessigolles?

Are you the one who doesn't have ticklish spots?

Tu ets el més gran?

Are you the oldest?

No, gràcies, eh?

No, thank you, huh?

Tu eres el que castigava el resto.

You were the one who punished the rest.

Abans de res, com et dius?

First of all, what's your name?

José Enrique.

José Enrique.

José.

José.

Bé, tu ets el més gran de cinc germans?

Well, are you the oldest of five siblings?

Sí.

Yes.

I com a gran, què feies?

And as a grown-up, what did you do?

Torturaves o eres torturat o què feies?

Were you torturing or were you being tortured or what were you doing?

No, molt bo era.

No, it was very good.

No, això ho diuen tots.

No, everyone says that.

Jo estivava molt a tots els meus germans.

I spent a lot of time with all my brothers.

Es tractaves bé, però entre cinc,

You treated well, but among five,

algú es fotia d'hòsties entre ells?

Did someone beat each other up?

El primer soc jo.

I am the first one.

El segon va néixer el mateix any que jo.

The second was born the same year as me.

O sigui, el meu pare va esperar la quarantena i...

So, my father waited for the quarantine and...

D'acord, ja està, fins aquí no vull més detalls.

Okay, that's it, I don't want any more details.

I...

I...

Qui es pagava?

Who was paying?

Qui es pagava entre ells?

Who paid between them?

Tots.

Everyone.

Els tres grans.

The three grandes.

Després n'hi havia dos més petits, però bueno...

Then there were two smaller ones, but well...

I tu com a gran feies alguna cosa de germà gran,

And you, as the older sibling, did something as an older brother,

de dir, ei, poso pau o alguna cosa?

To say, hey, do I put a stop or something?

Sí, corríem una vegada davant i una altra darrere.

Yes, we would run once in front and once behind.

És meravellós, la història del José,

It is wonderful, the story of José.

que són cinc germans.

they are five brothers.

Un aplaudiment.

A round of applause.

I en el número quatre, l'Adam Martín,

And in number four, Adam Martín,

que no sé si vols explicar alguna cosa de la relació

I don't know if you want to explain something about the relationship.

amb quatre germans.

with four brothers.

Jo era molt més germà.

I was much more of a brother.

Jo era el segon de quatre.

I was the second of four.

I em porto dos amb la gran, dos amb la mitjana,

I take two with the big one, two with the medium one,

amb la tercera,

with the third,

i nou amb el meu germà petit,

and new with my little brother,

que per a mi eres un complet desconegut.

that for me you are a complete stranger.

Quan ell tenia nou anys, jo estava a la universitat, ja.

When he was nine years old, I was already at university.

I dius, no sé qui és,

And you say, I don't know who it is,

me'l trobo pel carrer i no el reconec.

I run into him on the street and I don't recognize him.

Això és exagerat, eh?

This is exaggerated, huh?

Però és interessant tenir tanta gent a casa.

But it is interesting to have so many people at home.

Per cert, la meva filla gran va fer 18 anys

By the way, my eldest daughter turned 18.

la setmana passada.

last week.

I em sento molt gran.

I feel very big.

I volia compartir-ho.

I wanted to share it.

De moment, una croqueta per tu.

For now, a croquette for you.

Li ha tocat una croqueta.

He has received a croquette.

Sempre que parlem de la família,

Whenever we talk about the family,

parlem de la família d'on venim,

let's talk about the family we come from,

però no de la que fem.

but not from the one we do.

Jo no sé fins a quin punt, si vosaltres us plantegeu

I don't know to what extent, if you are considering.

tenir una família o no,

to have a family or not,

i Ignasi i Raquel.

Ignasi and Raquel.

No.

No.

Ara ja dirà sí.

Now she will say yes.

La veritat és que no en parlem

The truth is that we don't talk about it.

perquè no hi ha plans que això passi mai.

because there are no plans for this to ever happen.

D'acord, però bueno, hi ha moltes fórmules.

Okay, but well, there are many formulas.

Hi ha moltes fórmules.

There are many formulas.

Però cap m'interessa.

But I don't care about any of them.

D'acord.

Okay.

És veritat que cada cop hi ha més gent que diu

It is true that there are more and more people who say

jo no vull tenir descendència.

I do not want to have descendants.

No, no, jo no vull tenir descendència.

No, no, I do not want to have offspring.

Abans era una cosa impossible, perdona.

It used to be an impossible thing, sorry.

Era gairebé un pecat dir que no volies tenir família.

It was almost a sin to say that you didn't want to have a family.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

I ara també una mica.

And now also a little.

Segons on ho dius, és com...

According to how you say it, it's like...

Aquesta gent tan egoista que necessiten...

These selfish people who need...

Home, jo ho estic pensant, però no ho estic dient.

At home, I am thinking about it, but I am not saying it.

La gent et diu, doncs la meva àvia va tenir nou fills

People tell you, well my grandmother had nine children.

i menjaven una patata cada dia.

and they ate a potato every day.

I dius, home, potser no és el plan ideal.

And you say, man, maybe it's not the ideal plan.

De la teva àvia, tampoc.

Not from your grandmother, either.

És una cosa com que és com...

It's something like...

Perquè tu ets un egoista que només penses en tu per la teva vida,

Because you are an egoist who only thinks about yourself for your life,

però després quan veus la meva vida,

but then when you see my life,

també t'adones que tampoc m'ho estic passant molt bé jo sol, saps?

You also realize that I'm not having a great time by myself, you know?

Vull dir, no és com...

I mean, it’s not like...

Estic horribíssim.

I am feeling horrible.

Ves a collir olives, xato.

Go pick olives, kid.

Tu m'aculls collint olives?

Are you welcoming me by picking olives?

Jo sí, jo sí.

Me yes, me yes.

Raquel, tu què et planteges?

Raquel, what are you thinking about?

Jo tinc un gat i un cos,

I have a cat and a body,

i jo crec que són els fills del mil·lenni, els ara mateix, no?

And I think they are the children of the millennium, the ones right now, aren’t they?

Jo no em puc permetre tenir un fill, és molt car.

I can't afford to have a child; it's very expensive.

Bueno, aquesta és una altra història, clar.

Well, that is another story, of course.

Jo no em puc permetre.

I cannot afford it.

Si no me puc alquilar un pis en Barcelona,

If I can't rent an apartment in Barcelona,

estic jo per tenir el Fagales, saps el que et dic?

I'm here to have the Fagales, you know what I mean?

No és impossible.

It's not impossible.

Fagales, eh?

Faggots, huh?

Però sí, ara m'està passant que tinc 30

But yes, now it's happening to me that I'm 30.

i estic començant a veure els bebès amb un altre...

I'm starting to see babies in a different...

Ui!

Oh!

És com que fa...

It's like it's been...

La llamada de la selva.

The Call of the Wild.

Ai, ai, ai.

Oh, oh, oh.

La llamada de la selva.

The Call of the Wild.

I estic com preocupat.

I am feeling worried.

Però això és els bebès, els bebès són com els gossos, eh?

But this is babies, babies are like dogs, right?

A veure, no és un...

Let's see, it's not a...

Desenvolupa.

Develop.

Els bebès són com els gossos,

Babies are like dogs,

que és com quan vas a casa del teu amic...

it's like when you go to your friend's house...

Ai, que bonito!

Oh, how beautiful!

...i estàs 20 minuts amb ell,

...and you spend 20 minutes with him,

és com, ai, mira que bé, no?

It's like, oh, look how good, right?

És divertit jugar amb el fill de dos anys de tal.

It's fun to play with such a two-year-old son.

Però després, vas a treure a passejar...

But then, are you going to take out for a walk...

Sí.

Yes.

Es veu que sí, es veu que sí.

It seems so, it seems so.

I has de pagar l'escola de música,

You have to pay for music school.

has de pagar l'escola de música...

you have to pay the music school...

Has de coger les caques...

You have to pick up the poop...

Has de recollir les caques durant molt de temps...

You have to collect the poop for a long time...

Jo no les toco mucho por si acaso.

I don't touch them much just in case.

A los niños?

To the children?

No, no sé a qué me encariñe.

No, I don't know what I got attached to.

A mí me gustan mucho los niños, pero no...

I really like children, but no...

Sí, lo de tocar los niños, me gustan los niños...

Yes, the thing about touching children, I like children...

Tengo que solucionar antes cosas.

I have to solve some things first.

Yo dejo pausas, porque a mí me agrada molt

I take breaks because I really enjoy it.

deixar pausas después de acabar el juego.

leave pauses after finishing the game.

Que caiga el pez de la frase, no?

Let the fish of the phrase fall, right?

Dius, no, no, se va a meter más.

You say, no, no, it's going to get worse.

Encara pot estirar més.

It can still stretch more.

Llavors t'explica que plora a la dutxa, coses...

Then she tells you that she cries in the shower, things...

No, mi novia no quiere tampoco.

No, my girlfriend doesn't want to either.

Veus?

Do you see?

Jo no dic res, ell va fent, eh?

I'm not saying anything, he's just going along, right?

Está ahí, está ahí, está ahí.

It's there, it's there, it's there.

No quiere, ella no quiere.

She doesn't want, she doesn't want.

Vols fa que no, fa que no, per la gent que no...

You want it to be no, it to be no, for the people who don't...

Aniré a parlar amb ella d'un altre tema després, vale?

I will go talk to her about another topic later, okay?

Perquè el micro ara anà a saludar no...

Because the microphone is now going to say hello, no...

Ah, vale. Bueno, depende.

Ah, okay. Well, it depends.

Bueno, gràcies per venir, eh, la Núria?

Well, thank you for coming, eh, Núria?

Gràcies per venir, germans i germanes.

Thank you for coming, brothers and sisters.

Però tu, com a fill únic i això,

But you, as an only child and all that,

tenir o no tenir fills no té res a veure,

having or not having children has nothing to do with it,

o l'hauria sigut fill únic?

or would he have been an only child?

Conmigo se acaba, ya.

With me, it's over, now.

L'últim amparador.

The last shelter.

Perquè és cicatrista, eh, Gerard, ja ho saps.

Because it's a scar healer, huh, Gerard, you already know.

No, però també pot ser pres com a perquè ja no se puede superar.

No, but it can also be taken as a reason why it can no longer be overcome.

Vull dir, ja s'ha arribat aquí i ja no es pot superar.

I mean, we've already reached this point and it can't be surpassed.

És un bien.

It is a good thing.

Final, final de línia.

End, end of the line.

La dinastia de los Saez fins aquí.

The Saez dynasty ends here.

Exacto, exacto.

Exactly, exactly.

El último Saez.

The last Saez.

Premio Planeta, eh?

Planeta Prize, huh?

El último Saez.

The last Saez.

Maravillós.

Wonderful.

Exacte.

Exact.

Germans i germanes, per exemple, ens deia la Monyus,

Brothers and sisters, for example, the Monyus would tell us,

tinc l'honor, dintre de les victòries,

I have the honor, among the victories,

amb uns germans, tinc l'honor d'haver-li...

with some brothers, I have the honor of having...

Hi ha gent que està molt orgullosa d'haver pagat

There are people who are very proud of having paid.

a un germà o germana

to a brother or sister

i haver-li deixat una marca.

and having left a mark on her.

La Monyus diu, tinc l'honor d'haver-li fet saltar dues dents.

Monyus says, I have the honor of having knocked out two of your teeth.

No.

No.

Jo tinc l'honor de no ser la germana de la Monyus.

I have the honor of not being Monyus's sister.

Tio, la Monyus és ja...

Dude, Monyus is already...

Cada dinar de Nadal quan riu, eh?

Every Christmas lunch when he laughs, right?

Però la Monyus ja és nom de persona de carcelari, o no?

But Monyus is already a name of a prisoner, right?

La Monyus...

The Monyus...

La Monyus és com un capítol de crims perfectament.

La Monyus is like a chapter of crimes perfectly.

La Monyus, la Monyus.

The Monyus, the Monyus.

Escolta'm, perdona, la meva mare està parlant de fondo?

Listen to me, excuse me, is my mother talking in the background?

Tu? Pot ser que estiguis parlant mentre estem treballant?

You? Could it be that you are talking while we are working?

Pot ser o no? Em veu molt alta, eh?

Can it be or not? You see me very loud, huh?

Deia-ho, deia-ho, perdona, deia-ho.

Say it, say it, sorry, say it.

A mi em flipa la Paula, que diu...

I love Paula, who says...

Li vaig llençar una llimona al cap,

I threw a lemon at his head,

vaig encertar i li va rejar el sang del nas.

I hit him and he bled from his nose.

Que com a mecanisme és bastant guai.

As a mechanism, it's pretty cool.

I el llimona és desinfector.

And the lemon is a disinfectant.

Té un punt de faula, no?

It has a bit of nonsense, doesn't it?

Tira la llimona, comença a sortir sang...

Throw the lemon, blood starts to come out...

Però la llimona li va donar al nas o va ser com una reacció?

But did the lemon go to his nose or was it like a reaction?

Al cap, al cap, diu.

At the head, at the head, he says.

Li va donar com al costat i de sobte com al nas?

He gave it to him on the side and suddenly on the nose?

A tu un ictus.

A stroke for you.

Li va tocar l'artèria.

He hit the artery.

L'artèria fràgil i t'ha...

The fragile artery and has you...

Li va començar a sortir sang per l'orella, encara és més dur.

He started to bleed from his ear; it's even tougher.

Difícil.

Difficult.

És com una mort, no?, de sobte.

It's like a death, isn't it? Suddenly.

Quan surt una mica de sang s'ha acabat tot.

When a little blood comes out, it's all over.

Sí, no de bona sort.

Yes, not of good luck.

No, no, no.

No, no, no.

Fresco i mort.

Fresh and dead.

Vosaltres a violència fins a aquest punt no, eh, a casa?

You don't have violence to this extent at home, do you?

No, a mi no.

No, not me.

Les batalles cruentes tenien lloc entre els meus germans grans.

The bloody battles took place among my older brothers.

Jo ja vaig arribar després i ja estàvem...

I arrived later and we were already...

Però és veritat, la meva mare ho pot confirmar,

But it is true, my mother can confirm it,

que a casa el meu germà i jo no ens barallàvem gaire.

At home, my brother and I didn't fight much.

Ens ignoràvem.

We ignored each other.

El meu germà m'ignorava. Per què m'ignorava?

My brother was ignoring me. Why was he ignoring me?

M'ignorava tant, el meu germà.

My brother ignored me so much.

Per què, per què?

Why, why?

Bueno, m'estiro jo un moment i m'ho expliques.

Well, I'll stretch for a moment and you explain it to me.

Crec que la indiferència fa més mal, segons com.

I believe that indifference hurts more, in a way.

El meu germà, recordem que ho he explicat...

My brother, remember that I explained it...

Un moment, un moment, un moment,

One moment, one moment, one moment,

que vaig a parlar amb la meva mare del meu germà

I am going to talk to my mother about my brother.

i del trauma que tenim a casa.

and the trauma we have at home.

Solucionar este tema, ara.

Solve this issue, now.

Sí, solucionem un moment.

Yes, let's solve it for a moment.

Què passava a casa?

What was happening at home?

Ens barallàveu perquè jo intentava que no us baralléssiu.

You were fighting because I was trying to prevent you from fighting.

Eh, què passa aquí?

Hey, what's going on here?

I llavors ja no ens barallàveu.

And then you didn't fight anymore.

Eh, què passa aquí?

Hey, what's going on here?

No s'ha solucionat tan fàcil, eh, Maria?

It hasn't been solved so easily, huh, Maria?

El meu trauma, l'origen és tu, és teu.

My trauma, the origin is you, it is yours.

Anava al col·le i tu li deies

I was going to school and you told him.

acompanya el teu germà a l'escola.

accompany your brother to school.

I el meu germà, quan sortíem de casa...

And my brother, when we would leave the house...

Calla un moment.

Be quiet for a moment.

Quan sortíem de casa, em deia

When we were leaving the house, she would say to me.

nen, tu 10 metres enrere.

Kid, you 10 meters back.

I ell se n'anava amb els seus amics.

And he was going away with his friends.

Tu això ho sabies?

Did you know this?

Sí, sí, al final ho vaig saber,

Yes, yes, in the end I found out.

però jo confiava que ell ho faria, que cuidava.

but I trusted that he would do it, that he cared.

Que jo, en retrovisor, hi va mirant.

That I, in the rearview mirror, am looking at it.

I sabent això, Mari, la meva mare,

And knowing this, Mari, my mother,

suposo que hi ha una part de l'herència

I suppose there is a part of the inheritance.

que hauria de compensar aquest dolor.

that should compensate for this pain.

Doncs no sé, perquè ell diu que és la veu.

Well, I don't know, because he says it's the voice.

Què és, la?

What is it, then?

L'hereu.

The heir.

Ell és l'hereu, clar, el seu gran.

He is the heir, of course, his great one.

Quins arguments més moderns.

What more modern arguments.

Això és el 1400.

This is the 1400.

S'ha acabat, ja.

It's over, that's it.

Bueno, hi ha croquetes aquí, eh?

Well, there are croquettes here, right?

Qui vol croquetes de la Mari?

Who wants croquettes from Mari?

Algú les vol o no?

Does anyone want them or not?

Perquè la gent té por.

Because people are afraid.

Les sortejarem així, a lo loco, perquè la gent no...

We'll draw them like this, randomly, so people don't...

No les tiraremos.

We will not throw them away.

No els hi demanis...

Don't ask them...

Cabalgata de croquetes.

Croquette parade.

Jo faria, li donaria un caça papallones a tothom.

I would give everyone a butterfly net.

Es como San Medi, pero en croquetas.

It's like San Medi, but in croquettes.

Parlem de l'objecte.

Let's talk about the object.

Ja sabeu que, en aquest programa,

You already know that, in this program,

els convidats i les convidades porten un objecte.

The guests bring an object.

Avui, els objectes m'han sorprès molt.

Today, the objects surprised me a lot.

Sempre hi ha alguna cosa sentimental, no?

There's always something sentimental, right?

Aquell rellotge de pèndol que va dir el grasset.

That pendulum clock that the piglet mentioned.

No, tothom se pone tierna.

No, everyone gets soft.

L'avi va morir donant-li corda.

The grandfather died winding it up.

Estava allà agonitzat.

He was there, agonizing.

Sí, la fullera que en donàvem, no?

Yes, the one we gave out, right?

Sí, van plorar tots.

Yes, they all cried.

La primera papilla.

The first puree.

I l'objecte de l'Ignasi és un iPhone.

And Ignasi's object is an iPhone.

L'iPhone.

The iPhone.

Poc és aquesta tristor d'història.

This sadness of history is small.

És el millor objecte de tots.

It is the best object of all.

Em pensava que seria un mitjó.

I thought it would be a sock.

Era iPhone.

It was iPhone.

Però és que, vull dir, el rellotge aquell de corda

But I mean, that winding watch.

ja no funciona fa molts anys, però l'iPhone, a l'hora, va perfecte.

It hasn't worked for many years, but the iPhone works perfectly.

Però, a veure, explica'ns, què passa amb l'iPhone?

But, come on, explain to us, what’s going on with the iPhone?

Que no vaig entendre la pregunta.

I didn't understand the question.

Aquí volíem arribar.

This is where we wanted to get to.

Jo vaig pensar que era com, diguem, un objecte,

I thought it was like, let's say, an object,

el que t'agradi més, i vaig pensar, doncs, l'iPhone, la veritat.

what you like the most, and I thought, well, the iPhone, to be honest.

Però ja que hi som, per què t'agrada tant, fill meu?

But since we're here, why do you like it so much, my son?

Home, mira, per començar, per què vaig poder contestar això mateix?

Dude, look, to begin with, why was I able to answer this very thing?

La comunicació.

The communication.

No, m'agrada perquè...

No, I like it because...

És guapo.

He is handsome.

Perquè sí, és guapo, és un...

Because yes, he's handsome, he's a...

El dia que obres la caixa,

The day you open the box,

jo crec que és dels dies més feliços de la meva vida.

I believe it is one of the happiest days of my life.

I estos plásticos, que está todo pensado.

And these plastics, everything is thought out.

¿El plástico? Pero no es como...

Plastic? But isn’t it like...

No, los plásticos del voltar.

No, the plastics of the turning.

Clar, i tu obres aquella caixa

Sure, and you open that box.

que és una espècie que està donant un petó

that is a species that is giving a kiss

a Steve Jobs a la boca.

a Steve Jobs in the mouth.

Exacto, a mí el plástico del cargador

Exactly, the plastic of the charger bothers me.

me gusta tanto que no lo quito nunca.

I like it so much that I never take it off.

Oh, no, hombre, no, pero esto no, por favor.

Oh, no, man, no, but not this, please.

Lo enchufo con el plástico y todo.

I plug it in with the plastic and all.

Sí, pero esto a mí me parece...

Yes, but this seems to me...

Está tan bien, de hecho.

It's actually so good.

Mi novia está haciendo con la cabeza.

My girlfriend is nodding her head.

Sí, ¿no?

Yes, right?

¿Y tú le intentas quitar el plástico o también te gusta?

And are you trying to take the plastic off or do you like it too?

Los protectores de pantalla, ¿eh?

Screen savers, huh?

Sí.

Yes.

Ets aquesta persona.

You are that person.

Yo me compré un iMac d'estos que dices

I bought one of those iMacs you mention.

que guapo, me compré el más barato

how handsome, I bought the cheapest one

que va fatal, se lo puedes mirar en Facebook.

it's going terribly, you can check it on Facebook.

¿Y la caixa la has tirado o no?

And did you throw away the box or not?

Porque la caixa...

Because the box...

A mí me fa molta pena tirar la caixa.

I feel very sorry to throw away the box.

Y me dio una pena quitar los plásticos.

And I felt sorry to remove the plastics.

Sí?

Yes?

Pero sal de la pantalla y todo.

But get out of the screen and everything.

Me dio pena, dije, bueno, va, venga, a lo loco.

I felt sad, I said, well, okay, let's go for it.

Escolta'm, tu estàs molt enganxat

Listen to me, you're very hooked.

al telèfon o no, Ignasi?

On the phone or not, Ignasi?

Sí, cada vegada intento enganxar-me més.

Yes, every time I try to get more hooked.

No, no, al revés.

No, no, the other way around.

Però què és el que t'enganxa, les xarxes o la WhatsApp?

But what is it that hooks you, social media or WhatsApp?

Intentar no estar sol.

Try not to be alone.

Violins, però molt forts, aquí, Gerard.

Violins, but very loud, here, Gerard.

No n'hi ha, no n'hi ha.

There isn't any, there isn't any.

És intentar distreure'm del silenci

It's trying to distract me from the silence.

que es produeix quan se m'acaba la bateria

what happens when my battery runs out

fins que arribo a casa a carregar l'iPhone.

until I get home to charge the iPhone.

És com, ara què faig si no puc estar informat

It's like, what do I do now if I can't stay informed?

de l'última hora de totes les coses que passen

of the latest hour of everything that happens

i no m'interessa ningú.

and I'm not interested in anyone.

Però tu, quina és la teva xarxa?

But you, what is your network?

La meva xarxa és Twitter.

My network is Twitter.

Per què? Perquè m'encanta.

Why? Because I love it.

M'encanta estar informat.

I love being informed.

Però hi ha molta gent que diu que Twitter...

But there are many people who say that Twitter...

Ara miro aquí, perquè segur que hi ha gent d'aquí que...

Now I look here, because I'm sure there are people here that...

Mira, a ell no li agrada Twitter.

Look, he doesn't like Twitter.

No, és escarrós.

No, it's frightening.

A mi tampoc m'agrada, però m'agrada ser-hi.

I don't like it either, but I like being there.

És com tot el que ho diu del món

It is like everything it says about the world.

concentrat en una cosa que fas.

concentrate on one thing you do.

Actualitzar.

Update.

Aquí tens 100 motius més per odiar el món.

Here are 100 more reasons to hate the world.

Ara es podria dividir la societat

Now society could be divided.

entre la gent que és d'Instagram i la gent que és de Twitter.

between the people who are on Instagram and the people who are on Twitter.

Però a vegades hi ha coses maques a Twitter.

But sometimes there are nice things on Twitter.

És com potser hi ha...

It's like maybe there is...

Un vídeo d'unes càmeres que ballen...

A video of some dancing cameras...

Saps? I a vegades és això.

You know? And sometimes it's just that.

I està entre un tuit de l'Open Arms

And it is in a tweet from Open Arms.

i un tuit de no sé què.

and a tweet about I don't know what.

Opinió d'un imbècil i un erissó

Opinion of a fool and a hedgehog

fent-se un bany calent.

taking a hot bath.

El món et sembla un lloc meravellós

The world seems like a wonderful place to you.

només per contrastar amb Twitter.

just to contrast with Twitter.

Després vas pel carrer i tens com...

Then you walk down the street and you have like...

És com un Goku portant coses aquí

It's like a Goku carrying things around here.

a les cames per entrenar-se.

to the legs for training.

Els peus em van lleugers.

My feet feel light.

Tu ets més d'Instagram o...?

Are you more of an Instagram person or...?

Jo sóc de Twitter, també. A mi m'encanta Twitter.

I am from Twitter, too. I love Twitter.

Jo no li poso ninguna pega a Twitter.

I don't have any objections to Twitter.

Ja pega. Jo crec que és un lloc meravellós.

It really does. I think it's a wonderful place.

No, no, res. O sigui, és perfecte.

No, no, nothing. I mean, it's perfect.

L'interfat, per exemple.

The interface, for example.

I tota l'estona, va, va, va.

And all the time, go, go, go.

És tan trist quan t'has acabat Twitter?

It's so sad when you've finished Twitter?

Sí.

Yes.

Quan portes llegint...

When you have been reading...

He llegit aquest tuit quatre vegades, de veritat.

I have read this tweet four times, really.

L'últim tuit que pone dient, no?

The last tweet that says, right?

En plan, viu la teva vida.

Like, live your life.

Això a mi m'ha passat a Instagram.

This has happened to me on Instagram.

T'has acabat Instagram.

You've finished Instagram.

M'ha sortit un missatge de dir

I have received a message to say.

ja has vist totes les publicacions dels últims dos dies.

Have you seen all the posts from the last two days?

Siga con lo suyo.

Carry on with your business.

Clar, és que...

Of course, it's just that...

Viva la vida, coño.

Live the life, damn it.

És l'equivalent del cambrer del bar

It is the equivalent of the bartender.

d'ella ha bevido usted suficiente por hoy, jo.

You have drunk enough of her for today, I.

Vaya a ser a casa, saps?

I'm going to be at home, you know?

Ja no tiene nada que ver.

It no longer has anything to do with it.

És com, bueno, em fa sentir com malament.

It's like, well, it makes me feel kind of bad.

Doncs no mireu tant i aixequeu els ulls

So don't look down so much and lift your eyes.

i mireu-nos els ulls.

And look into our eyes.

Ara és una merda.

Now it's a mess.

Bueno, tranquils.

Well, take it easy.

Aquest programa és optimista.

This program is optimistic.

Sí, per què?

Yes, why?

Per què la vida?

Why life?

I per què no?

And why not?

Anem a l'objecte de la Raquel.

Let's go to Raquel's object.

Canta és la pregunta.

Sing is the question.

Segur que ens portarà a llocs.

Surely it will take us to places.

Bueno, em va costar, eh, també.

Well, it was hard for me too, you know.

És entendida, també.

She is understood, too.

Ens portarà a llocs més tendres

It will take us to softer places.

i de records, o no.

And of memories, or not.

És una pinta de color lila.

It is a purple pen.

És bonic, el record, o no?

It's beautiful, the memory, isn't it?

És un record.

It's a memory.

No sé si és bonic o no.

I don't know if it's beautiful or not.

Quan tu estaves amb les olives...

When you were with the olives...

No, la cosa és que jo tampoc vaig entendre molt la pregunta.

No, the thing is that I also didn't understand the question very well.

Però mira que és fàcil de preguntar, eh?

But look how easy it is to ask, huh?

Seré sincera. Quan em va dir

I will be honest. When you told me.

agafa una cançó, un objecte i un plat,

take a song, an object, and a dish,

jo pensava que havia de venir aquí

I thought I had to come here.

amb un objecte, amb un plat de la cuina.

with an object, with a plate from the kitchen.

I va ser com, i tu tampoc

It was like that, and you too.

l'havia entès, i a mi ja m'estava bé.

I had understood it, and it was fine with me.

T'he dit això de plàstic o vale?

I've told you this about plastic, okay?

Pot ser que els expliquéssi, Roger, una mica ràpid?

Could I explain it to you quickly, Roger?

Pot ser que la gent de l'humor

It may be that people of humor

esteu una mica grillats.

you are a bit crazy.

Mira que és fàcil, eh?

Look how easy it is, huh?

Jo lo veo fàcil.

I see it easy.

I llavors era, o les tisores on la meva mare

And then it was, or the scissors where my mother

em tallava les ungles de petita, que encara

I used to bite my nails when I was little, still do.

corre per casa. Quina por, eh?

It runs around the house. What a scare, huh?

Sí, però són com superpetites, o la pinta,

Yes, but they are like super small, or the comb,

i és una pinta de color lila que està sempre a casa.

And it is a lilac color pint that is always at home.

I m'he mudat,

I have moved.

i m'he mudat a Mursita, i sempre la pinta

I have moved to Mursita, and I always paint it.

ha anat acompanyant-me.

has been accompanying me.

La meva vida, i va ser, mira, aquest.

My life, and it was, look, this.

Però tampoc li tinc com especial carinyo a la pinta, saps?

But I don't have any special fondness for the comb either, you know?

Però al final l'has portat, o no?

But in the end, did you bring it or not?

No, perquè està a Múrcia.

No, because it is in Murcia.

Però de fet, ara no l'he unit ni utilitzat.

But in fact, I haven't used or joined it now.

Parlem un moment de Múrcia. Què vols saber?

Let's talk about Murcia for a moment. What do you want to know?

Múrcia, Nico. Veus? Provoca això.

Murcia, Nico. See? This provokes that.

Dius Múrcia, i hi ha una gent que riu,

You say Murcia, and there are people laughing,

però és com una inquietud, eh?

but it’s like a restlessness, right?

Perquè la gent dius Múrcia,

Why do people say Murcia?

i t'agafa com una... Ai, pobre, no,

and it grabs you like a... Oh, poor thing, no,

però jo soc d'esquerres, eh? No passa res, eh?

But I'm left-wing, okay? It's all good, right?

De veritat, eh?

Really, eh?

I soc bona persona. No sé què provoca

I am a good person. I don't know what causes it.

exactament, però provoca una reacció

exactly, but it triggers a reaction

d'intrapànic.

of intrapanic.

Però això us passa a vosaltres, als catalans,

But this happens to you, the Catalans,

que el que és que a Tarragona, per baix, és que no passeu tampoc.

That what it is, is that in Tarragona, down there, you don't pass either.

Saps? Bueno, ara no ens ataquis,

You know? Well, don't attack us now.

perquè jo t'estava atacant a tu.

because I was attacking you.

No, però era bonic, era bonic.

No, but it was beautiful, it was beautiful.

Sí, sí, ho sé, ho sé.

Yes, yes, I know, I know.

Digue'ns coses de Múrcia que ens sorprenguin.

Tell us surprising things about Murcia.

La huesta. Coses bones, coses bones.

The host. Good things, good things.

No, perquè la imatge que tenim és un soc arral ple de feixistes.

No, because the image we have is a swamp full of fascists.

No, no, sí, però no, la marinera.

No, no, yes, but no, the mariner.

La marinera, per exemple.

The sailor, for example.

Això està molt bé. És una cosa de Múrcia

This is very good. It is something from Murcia.

que és molt bonica. És un trozo de pan enrotllat,

which is very beautiful. It is a piece of bread rolled up,

així, com...

thus, how...

Vaja, no li facis

Wow, don’t do it to him/her.

Múrcia's planning a la Raquel.

Murcia's planning for Raquel.

A ver si es verdad, a ver si es verdad.

Let's see if it's true, let's see if it's true.

Es, es, es,

Yes, yes, yes,

como un pico de estos de pan.

like one of those bread rolls.

¿Es redondo?

Is it round?

Sí. Continua, ven, continúa.

Yes. Go on, come on, continue.

Tú sigue. Tú fes pausas, ya verás.

You keep going. You take breaks, you'll see.

Como con ensaladilla rusa,

I eat Russian salad,

algo así. ¿Y qué ves?

Something like that. And what do you see?

Una anchoa o una oliva. Menys o menys, sí.

An anchovy or an olive. More or less, yes.

Menys o menys.

More or less.

No sé si la marinera compensa els feixistes,

I don't know if the sailor offsets the fascists.

eh, Raquel? Bueno,

Hey, Raquel? Well,

depende dónde te la comas.

it depends on where you eat it.

A ver, a mí me digo, es como un rostro.

Let's see, I tell myself, it's like a face.

Un rosquillo gigante, molt gran,

A giant doughnut, very big,

amb ensaladilla rusa i

with Russian salad and

una anchoa, anchova? Sí, anchova.

an anchovy, anchova? Yes, anchova.

Anchova en català? Sí, anchova.

Anchovy in Catalan? Yes, anchovy.

O buquero?

Or buckler?

És la ceituna i oliva, aquí, anchova i buquero

It is the olive and olive, here, anchovy and buquero.

és una mica de l'ambulic, eh?

It's a bit of a distraction, isn't it?

Ceitó, ceitó, ceitó.

Caito, caito, caito.

No, està molt bé.

No, it's very good.

Marinera o marinero.

Sailor.

Marinera o marinero, i després, sense res,

Sailor or seaman, and then, without anything.

es diu bicicleta. Això no ho entenem.

It is called a bicycle. We don't understand that.

Ah, bicicleta. Això és Múrcia!

Ah, bicycle. This is Murcia!

Sí, se'n va a aplaudir per Múrcia!

Yes, he/she is going to applaud for Murcia!

Múrcia!

Murcia!

El masculino de marinera...

The masculine of "marinera"...

Bicicleta.

Bicycle.

Ja ho tenim.

We have it.

No ho sé, algú ha estat a Múrcia?

I don't know, has anyone been to Murcia?

Sí. Com per defensar-ho?

Yes. How to defend it?

Mira, ella és la meva amiga i ha estat a casa

Look, she is my friend and she has been at home.

i ha estat a Múrcia.

And it has been in Murcia.

Però és bonic, o sigui que té...

But it is beautiful, so it has...

A Múrcia, en si, capital és...

In Murcia, the capital is...

No és bonic, l'Ada em diu que no.

It's not nice, Ada tells me no.

A veure, jo he estat a Múrcia,

Let's see, I have been to Murcia,

he estat a la huerta del seu pare,

I have been to his father's garden,

i després també he estat a Múrcia, a la ciutat.

And then I have also been to Murcia, to the city.

Llavors, bueno, és rural,

Then, well, it's rural,

d'on és rural...

where it's rural...

I és ciutat d'on és ciutat.

And it is a city from where it is a city.

Ah, és que...

Ah, it's just that...

Ens hem d'imaginar Múrcia, ciutat,

We have to imagine Murcia, city,

la que no és rural, amb gratacels,

the one that is not rural, with skyscrapers,

molta llum, rotllo Tòquio?

a lot of light, Tokyo vibe?

No.

No.

No, una mica...

No, a little...

Més amb catedrals i...

More with cathedrals and...

Arcances?

Arcances?

Més... Arcances?

More... Arches?

Hi ha una plaça que té...

There is a square that has...

Jo mai he estat a Arcances.

I have never been to Arcances.

La plaça de les Flores?

The Flower Square?

Té com una porxada...

It has like a porch...

No?

No?

Que no hace porche ni...

That it doesn't make a porch or...

No, no és la plaça de les Flores?

No, isn't it the Flower Square?

A mi em van dir, ves a la plaça de les Flores,

I was told, go to the Plaza de las Flores,

i vaig arribar allí i no hi havia flors, ningú.

I arrived there and there were no flowers, no one.

No sé per què es diu la plaça de les Flores,

I don't know why it's called the Square of Flowers,

però allà...

but there...

Jo tampoc.

Me neither.

Les marineres estan boníssimes.

The seafood dishes are delicious.

Ah, bueno, doncs mira...

Ah, well, then look...

L'Adam Martín també ha estat a Múrcia?

Has Adam Martín also been to Murcia?

Sí.

Yes.

Dos cops.

Two times.

I per què?

And why?

La pregunta és per què.

The question is why.

No, tres cops.

No, three times.

Què fas? Tranquil, relaxa't, perquè hi vas tant.

What are you doing? Calm down, relax, why are you in such a hurry?

No ho sé, una perquè vivia la meva família,

I don't know, one because my family lived there,

que vivien en un camp de golf a Los Belones, a Múrcia, saps?

who lived in a golf course in Los Belones, Murcia, you know?

Ah, sí?

Oh, really?

En un camp de golf.

On a golf course.

En el camp de golf?

On the golf course?

En el campo de golf.

On the golf course.

En una caseta de guardar los palos.

In a shed for storing the sticks.

Eren noms, vas.

They were names, you go.

En un agujero del hoyo 18.

In a hole on hole 18.

Y después, la segunda vegada,

And then, the second time,

vaig anar per una feina,

I went for a job.

i la tercera també per una feina per Lidl.

And the third one is also for a job at Lidl.

Oh, va!

Oh, come on!

Vaig a un taller de salut.

I'm going to a health workshop.

Vale, marxeu vosaltres,

Okay, you all leave.

i que entri, sisplau,

and please let him/her in,

perquè necessito 20 minuts

because I need 20 minutes

per parlar de Lidl i Múrcia.

to talk about Lidl and Murcia.

I de la ment.

And of the mind.

Però tot bé.

But everything is fine.

Et va agradar Múrcia Capital?

Did you like Murcia Capital?

No.

No.

Ja està.

That's it.

No està mal, eh?

Not bad, huh?

A mi em va agradar, eh?

I liked it, you know?

Saps Múrcia Capital, de veritat?

Do you really know Murcia Capital?

No, Múrcia lo que tiene muy bueno es...

No, what Murcia has that is really good is...

Sus gentes.

His people.

Sus gentes...

Its people...

No, eh...

No, uh...

Todo lo que es el tema de las alazones

Everything related to the subject of the wild mares.

y los...

and the...

y las anchoas y todo eso.

and the anchovies and all that.

Ah, això està increïble.

Ah, this is amazing.

Perfecte, i les olives.

Perfect, and the olives.

Salazones.

Cured fish.

Salazones i...

Salted fish and...

Deixa'l, Adam, deixa'l.

Leave it, Adam, leave it.

Ell parla i queda gravat,

He speaks and it is recorded,

i després ho...

and then it...

És veritat.

It is true.

Després ho tallem.

Then we will cut it.

No, però és veritat.

No, but it's true.

Al contrari, ho deixem.

On the contrary, we leave it.

Todo lo que son ensaladas y...

Everything that is salads and...

No, ensaladas no.

No, no salads.

Salazones.

Salted fish.

La típica anchoa que pasa por el mar de Múrcia.

The typical anchovy that passes through the sea of Murcia.

Sí, boníssima.

Yes, very good.

Ara que parlem de menjar,

Now that we are talking about food,

demanem sempre també alguna cosa de menjar

we always also ask for something to eat

que es remeti.

that is referred.

Un ratatouille, eh?

A ratatouille, huh?

Un magdalen de plou.

A rain muffin.

Això ho vau entendre?

Did you understand this?

Que parlava d'alguna cosa que us portés a casa,

That talked about something that would take you home,

a la família, sí?

to the family, right?

Un iPhone, oi, Ignasi?

An iPhone, right, Ignasi?

Un iPhone, un iPhone.

An iPhone, an iPhone.

Ara dirà McDonald's.

Now it will say McDonald's.

Ai, que enginyosos.

Oh, how witty.

La Raquel va dir la sopa de la mama.

Raquel said the soup of the mom.

Ai, sí, la sopa de la mama.

Oh yes, mom's soup.

Ara parlarem de la sopa.

Now we will talk about the soup.

L'Ignasi...

Ignasi...

Hamburguesa.

Hamburger.

Hamburguesa de casa, de la família.

Homemade hamburger, from the family.

Hamburguesa amb...

Hamburger with...

Espera, deixem un...

Wait, let me have a...

Parlem primer de la sopa,

Let's talk about the soup first,

mentre jo faig números.

while I do the math.

Vés a explicar.

Go explain.

Jo, ara, de què, què, què?

Me, now, of what, what, what?

La sopa de la mama.

Mom's soup.

Ah, bueno.

Ah, well.

Com era?

What was it like?

On entenies?

Did you understand?

A mi m'han remès...

I have been referred...

Bueno, a mi és que la sopa és una cosa que m'encanta,

Well, for me, soup is something I love.

t'ho juro, eh?

I swear it to you, okay?

Però qualsevol sopa...

But any soup...

Com és la sopa de Múrcia, de pedres?

How is the soup of Murcia, made with stones?

No, no, tampoc.

No, no, neither.

Lluge, per favor.

Lluge, please.

Se m'acudeix a muntar el cor.

I'm thinking of setting up the choir.

És de...

It is from...

No sé què li posa a la mama.

I don't know what she puts on mom.

S'arrazones, no?

You're reasoning, aren't you?

Li posa com moltes coses mortes, saps?

It puts her like many dead things, you know?

Bicicletes.

Bicycles.

Coses mortes.

Dead things.

Gallina, ternera, tota la olla.

Hen, veal, the whole pot.

Jo no sé què li fa...

I don't know what he's doing to her...

Moltes coses que entren per allí.

Many things come in through there.

Això?

This?

Cap a dins.

Inside.

Cap a dins, cap a dins, t'ho juro.

Inside, inside, I swear to you.

Una vegada és com, bueno, va a eixar el papa.

Once it's like, well, the pope is going to leave.

Va a eixar el papa a la olla.

The pope is going to leave the pot.

Com ho siga, sí.

Whatever it is, yes.

Corre, nada, vuela la cazuela.

Run, swim, fly the saucepan.

Sabe lo que te digo?

Do you know what I'm telling you?

I és com, no, pues és això.

And it's like, no, well it's this.

Una rata d'aigua.

A water rat.

És el meu plat favorit de la vida.

It's my favorite dish in life.

Sí, però quant te'n recordes de la sopa?

Yes, but how much do you remember about the soup?

Sí, la sopa de la teva mare...

Yes, your mother's soup...

Hi ha una època en concret de la teva vida?

Is there a specific time in your life?

Hi ha un moment...

There is a moment...

És a la nit?

Is it at night?

No, hi ha un moment molt bonic.

No, there is a very beautiful moment.

Que és veritat que és un record superbonic.

It's true that it's a super beautiful memory.

Jo quan vivia aquí a Barcelona,

When I lived here in Barcelona,

el meu pare era paleta, saps?

My father was a bricklayer, you know?

I jo em quedava al menjador.

And I stayed in the living room.

Al col·legi o a l'escola, d'acord?

At school or at the school, okay?

I quan plovia, el meu papa podia venir a recollir-me

And when it rained, my dad could come to pick me up.

i m'anava a menjar a casa.

I was going to eat at home.

I sempre hi havia, perquè com a casa sempre hi ha caldo,

And there was always, because there's always broth at home,

sempre, sempre, sempre,

always, always, always,

ell calentava el caldo, ho posava

he was heating the broth, he put it

i em deixava menjar-me el caldo amb pagita.

And I let myself be eaten by the broth with a spoon.

Que és una cosa que mai he sentit.

It's something I have never heard.

Un aplaudiment pel pare que ha deixat...

A round of applause for the father who has left...

És una història més bonica.

It's a prettier story.

És una cosa com superprohibida.

It's something like super prohibited.

La nínia, per què vol pagita si té cuchara?

The girl, why does she want to pay if she has a spoon?

Saps el que et dic?

Do you know what I’m telling you?

El papa em deixava menjar-me la sopa amb pagita.

The pope let me eat my soup with a spoon.

Però, perdona, si crema molt, allò, hòstia, és un...

But, excuse me, it burns a lot, that, man, it's a...

No, no, es fon, es fon la canya.

No, no, it melts, it melts the cane.

Perdona, que passa una...

Excuse me, what's happening...

No agafis croquetes, eh?

Don't take croquettes, okay?

Ah, no, que va, no sé on va, va cap allà.

Ah, no, not at all, I don't know where it's going, it's going over there.

I ara, per exemple, la cançó de Rigoberta Bandini,

And now, for example, the song by Rigoberta Bandini,

que parla també de la sopa,

that also speaks of the soup,

que hi ha sempre caldo a la nevera,

that there is always soup in the fridge,

jo en aquesta puta frase sempre ploro, tio.

I always cry in this fucking sentence, dude.

Tu jures que ploro perquè me'n recordo jo a la meva mare.

You swear that I cry because I remember my mother.

Veus com hi havia una història tendra i bonica?

Do you see how there was a tender and beautiful story?

No, un iPhone, eh?

No, an iPhone, huh?

Vinga.

Come on.

A veure, l'hamburguesa, què?

Let's see, what about the hamburger?

La història de l'hamburguesa encara és pitjor.

The history of the hamburger is even worse.

No, no. Vinga.

No, no. Come on.

L'hamburguesa és perquè...

The hamburger is because...

Jo vaig entendre malament la pregunta.

I misunderstood the question.

L'hamburguesa és...

The hamburger is...

Si no pilles res, tio,

If you don't get anything, man,

em pensava que el raro era el Tomàs Fuentes.

I thought that the weird one was Tomàs Fuentes.

Ets tu.

It's you.

Quan no teniu nada...

When you have nothing...

Clar, però la vaig entendre malament.

Of course, but I misunderstood it.

En el passat la vaig entendre...

In the past, I understood her...

Bueno, aquesta també forma part del passat,

Well, this is also part of the past,

perquè ara estem en un...

because now we are in a...

És molt meta, això, ara mateix.

It's very meta, this, right now.

Tenim Nolan a la taula.

We have Nolan at the table.

No, a veure, que m'estic liant jo sol.

No, let's see, I'm getting myself confused.

En el futuro me preguntaran.

In the future, they will ask me.

En un passat, quan tenia 10 anys,

In the past, when I was 10 years old,

em van fer fer una redacció sobre

they made me write an essay about

quin era el plat que més m'agradava.

what was the dish that I liked the most.

I jo vaig escriure

And I wrote.

l'hamburguesa del McDonald's.

the McDonald's hamburger.

Vaig escriure una redacció sobre

I wrote an essay about

com m'encantava l'hamburguesa del McDonald's.

I loved the McDonald's hamburger.

Què va passar? Que jo no vaig entendre la pregunta.

What happened? I didn't understand the question.

Ja amb 10 anys, ja no vaig entendre la pregunta en 10 anys.

At just 10 years old, I no longer understood the question at 10 years old.

Perquè de sobte tothom va començar

Why did everyone suddenly start?

a llegir amb veu alta

to read aloud

les seves redaccions i tothom era com

their writings and everyone was like

la meva mare prepara una sopa

My mother is making a soup.

i no sé què. Jo, hamburguesa del McDonald's.

and I don't know what. Me, McDonald's hamburger.

M'agrada molt perquè donen un regal.

I like it a lot because they give a gift.

Saps? Era com...

You know? It was like...

I quan la meva mare ho va llegir...

And when my mother read it...

Se li va trencar el cor.

His heart broke.

Ah, és una història trista.

Ah, it’s a sad story.

Vaig pensar...

I thought...

És veritat que no dono regals

It's true that I don't give gifts.

ni notes de sesrec

nor notes of the receipt

amb el que cuino, però...

with what I cook, but...

Potser una hamburguesa del McDonald's.

Maybe a hamburger from McDonald's.

Perdona, tu vas retreure

Sorry, you were going to reproach.

amb veu alta o se'n va anar plorant

with a loud voice or went away crying

sense dir res?

without saying anything?

No, va ser com...

No, it was like...

No, no, vam riure bastant.

No, no, we laughed quite a bit.

És una anècdota recurrent.

It's a recurring anecdote.

Què va sopar aquell dia, Ignasi?

What did Ignasi have for dinner that day?

Doncs em sembla que no sé res, eh?

Well, it seems that I don't know anything, eh?

I els libritos de la mama.

And the little books of mom.

Sí, els libritos, si no t'ho gusten.

Yes, the little books, if you don't like them.

Home, clar, exacte.

Man, clear, exact.

Llavors, volia posar hamburguesa un altre cop

So, I wanted to put hamburger again.

perquè és això, és com...

because it is this, it is like...

Vaig entendre malament la pregunta,

I misunderstood the question,

però no aquesta, en concret, sinó...

but not this one, specifically, but...

Totes les preguntes.

All the questions.

En el concepte podcast de la família

In the concept of podcast of the family

de 10 anys, que és quan et fan fer una redacció,

at 10 years old, when you have to write an essay,

jo ja vaig equivocar-me.

I already made a mistake.

Que bonic, es porta equivocant quants anys, llavors?

How beautiful, how many years has it been getting it wrong, then?

Doncs mira, 33 en total.

Well, look, 33 in total.

33 en total.

33 in total.

En total d'una dona de l'altra.

In total from one woman to another.

Gent jove, Juanjo, gent jove, patou, gent jove que no...

Young people, Juanjo, young people, fool, young people that do not...

Per mi tots som joves, ja.

For me, we are all young, already.

Tu, el teu plat, Juanjo, l'hem dit alguna vegada?

You, your plate, Juanjo, have we said it some time?

Les migues?

The crumbs?

He tingut molts.

I have had many.

Bueno, me gustan, me gustan, me gustan.

Well, I like them, I like them, I like them.

A mi me gusta mucho

I like it a lot.

el conejo con arroz, por ejemplo.

the rabbit with rice, for example.

Ajá.

Aha.

Feu pauses, feu pauses.

Make pauses, make pauses.

Ja veureu que va tirant.

You'll see that it's progressing.

No tingueu por.

Don't be afraid.

Tira, tira.

Pull, pull.

¿Por qué? ¿De dónde sale el conejo?

Why? Where does the rabbit come from?

De mi abuela.

From my grandmother.

¿Veus?

Do you see?

Ja està, ja està.

That's it, that's it.

Avui s'ha parat aquí.

Today it has stopped here.

És que m'ha explicat el truco.

It's just that he's explained the trick to me.

Conejo con arroz

Rabbit with rice

y bueno.

and well.

No s'ha acabat, ho veieu?

It isn't over, do you see?

No, conejo con arroz me gusta mucho.

No, I really like rabbit with rice.

No sé, Núria, que me gusta.

I don't know, Núria, what I like.

Núria, que me gusta.

Núria, that I like.

És que a mi me gusta comer mucho.

It's just that I really like to eat a lot.

Recordeu que el Juanjo va a menjar cada dia

Remember that Juanjo eats every day.

a la grangeta.

to the little farm.

Envieu una salutació a la gent de la grangeta, també,

Send a greeting to the people of the granary, too.

des d'aquí, des de la Llama Estor.

from here, from the Estor Flame.

Jo pensava que exagerava el Juanjo.

I thought Juanjo was exaggerating.

Fins que vas allà i dius, Juanjo no exagera.

Until you go there and say, Juanjo is not exaggerating.

Allò és família. Allò és família per ell.

That is family. That is family to him.

Yo entro hasta que llego al...

I enter until I reach the...

Nos sentamos siempre en el fondo hasta que llego ahí

We always sit at the back until I get there.

y pasa un buen rato saludando a todo el mundo

and have a good time greeting everyone

que comes, tal, bien.

what you eat, such, good.

Todo bien hoy.

Everything is fine today.

És com l'encarregat de la sala.

It's like the person in charge of the room.

Sense cobrar.

Without charging.

Hoy he repetido postre.

Today I had dessert again.

No, és que la preocupació, sobretot, de la gent de la grangeta,

No, it's just that the concern, above all, of the people from the farm,

quina és respecte al Juanjo, Maria?

What is it regarding Juanjo, Maria?

Bàsicament, si ja el...

Basically, if you already...

Si et menjaràs, no? El postre que ja t'han guardat.

If you're going to eat it, right? The dessert that they've already saved for you.

Jo estic segura que hi ha gent que s'ha quedat sense postre

I am sure that there are people who have been left without dessert.

perquè l'han apartat del plat i no.

because they have taken him off the plate and not.

Tengo que pedir perdón.

I have to apologize.

Hoy no puedo, de verdad, el postre.

Today I can't, really, the dessert.

Pero es que hemos hecho un pastel

But we made a cake.

que sabemos que te gusta, de crema,

that we know you like, of cream,

con peras y todo, pero es que hoy no,

with pears and all, but today no.

porque...

because...

Anem a parlar amb l'Adam Martín un moment.

Let's go talk to Adam Martín for a moment.

Perquè recordeu que sovint es diu

Because remember that it is often said

la gent grossa, tal, no sé què,

the big people, such, I don't know what,

penses, ah, estarà malament de salut i tal.

You think, ah, he/she must be in poor health and so on.

I l'Adam Martín ens ha explicat, per activa i per passiva...

And Adam Martín has explained to us, in every possible way...

No, però jo estic molt bé, eh?

No, but I'm doing very well, okay?

Hi ha gent molt prima, com el Juanjo,

There are very thin people, like Juanjo,

que menja postres cada dia.

who eats dessert every day.

Molt mal.

Very bad.

Ah, que no es pot menjar postres cada dia?

Ah, so you can't eat dessert every day?

Però mira, Adam...

But look, Adam...

No, que pots menjar postres cada dia.

No, you can eat dessert every day.

Ara, quins postres menges cada dia?

Now, what dessert do you eat every day?

És aquesta, la pregunta.

It is this, the question.

Ui, no vol saber.

Oh, you don't want to know.

Són caceres muy buenos.

They are very good hunters.

No, perquè mireu el Juanjo.

No, because look at Juanjo.

Des de fora, eh, que sembla relativament bé.

From the outside, huh, it looks relatively good.

Per dintre està muerto, no?

Inside it is dead, isn’t it?

Li fas una autòpsia i t'has de posar 14 mascares.

You perform an autopsy and you have to wear 14 masks.

Home, si li fas una autòpsia, està claríssim que està fatal.

Man, if you do an autopsy on him, it's very clear that he's in terrible shape.

Si la fas viu, no seria el seu millor moment.

If you do it live, it wouldn't be her best moment.

No, estoy...

No, I am...

A mí el problema es la terraza.

For me, the problem is the terrace.

El resto del bloque del...

The rest of the block of...

Ah, és una metàfora!

Ah, it's a metaphor!

No sé de què està parlant.

I don't know what he/she is talking about.

El resto de la vivienda ha estat fenomenal.

The rest of the house has been phenomenal.

Pot ser que per dintre estigui molt...

It may be that inside it is very...

És gordiflaco, és gordiflaco.

He is a fat skinny man, he is a fat skinny man.

Gordiflaco.

FatThin.

No, gordiflaco no.

No, skinny fat no.

És gordiflaco, sí, sí.

He is fat-thin, yes, yes.

L'has fet analític, fa poc.

You did it analytically, not long ago.

Jo crec que tens greix visceral, que és realment perillós.

I believe you have visceral fat, which is really dangerous.

Al darrere de l'esquelet hi ha greix visceral.

Behind the skeleton, there is visceral fat.

Però què...

But what...

A veure si dorms avui, amb això.

Let's see if you sleep today with this.

Tot això era un podcast d'alegra...

All of this was a podcast of joy...

Sí, un podcast d'alegra, però ara...

Yes, a happy podcast, but now...

Aquest senyor que ha dit greix visceral...

This gentleman who has said visceral fat...

Quina és aquesta paraula?

What is this word?

Però què vols dir?

But what do you mean?

Tu creus que et pot identificar tu només veient-te?

Do you think someone can identify you just by looking at you?

Això és un bulo.

This is a hoax.

La Raquel te'l pot fer un diagnòstic, segons...

Raquel can give you a diagnosis, according to...

Jo tinc greix visceral...

I have visceral fat...

S'ha aixecat, la Raquel, l'està mirant l'Adam Martín.

Raquel has gotten up; she is looking at Adam Martín.

Això és un bulo d'internet.

This is an internet hoax.

És una anàlisi indirecta de...

It is an indirect analysis of...

Hauria de ser de la dieta.

It should be part of the diet.

La dieta, la que puc.

The diet, the one I can.

Bicicleta.

Bicycle.

La dieta, bicicleta.

The diet, bicycle.

La dieta, la que puc.

The diet, the one I can.

Molt ràpidament, aquestes croquetes estan fetes amb molt d'amor

Very quickly, these croquettes are made with a lot of love.

i no sé si hi ha greix visceral o no hi ha greix visceral aquí.

I don't know if there is visceral fat or if there is no visceral fat here.

Però això, la croqueta en general, molt ràpidament...

But this, the croquette in general, very quickly...

Home, ja t'ho he resolt de respondre jo, això.

Home, I have already solved it for you to respond to this.

La croqueta és bona.

The croquette is good.

La croqueta és bona, quedem-nos amb aquesta.

The croquette is good, let's stick with this one.

Treu-li el micro.

Take the microphone away from him/her.

No passa, no, s'està enganyant.

It's okay, no, he is deceiving himself.

Jo sóc fregit!

I am fried!

I què passa, que siguis fregit?

And what's happening, are you fried?

Tranquils, no, violència no.

Calm down, no, violence no.

És que jo ja us deia que no havia d'invitar l'Adam.

I already told you that I shouldn't have invited Adam.

Va, som al final, molt a prop del final d'aquest podcast especial.

Come on, we are finally very close to the end of this special podcast.

El meu fill ha passat de nosaltres durant una hora gairebé.

My son has been away from us for almost an hour.

Estava mirant el TikTok i ara et farà de mà innocent.

I was watching TikTok and now it will act as an innocent hand.

Home, perfecte.

Home, perfect.

Davia, amb qui d'aquí, de la gran família de Pep,

Davia, with whom from here, from Pep's large family,

agafa, sisplau, un número d'aquests que et donaré

please take one of these numbers that I will give you

i d'aquí tres segons podràs seguir mirant aquests senyors de TikTok.

And in three seconds you will be able to keep watching these gentlemen from TikTok.

Pep, no llores, que el papa te compra el micro, ara.

Pep, don't cry, because dad will buy you the microphone now.

Agafa el número i ara el diràs en aquest micròfon.

Take the number and now you will say it into this microphone.

A veure si te'l compren a tu.

Let's see if they buy it from you.

A veure si les classes que hem pagat serveixen...

Let's see if the classes we paid for are useful...

Avui el Jonathan, que és el seu professor, és aquí.

Today Jonathan, who is their teacher, is here.

Digue-ho en anglès, sisplau.

Say it in English, please.

Txu.

Txu.

Txu!

Hey!

Home, mira qui l'ha fet!

Wow, look who made it!

Jonathan, fantàstic!

Jonathan, fantastic!

Ho ha dit bé, Jonathan?

Did Jonathan say it correctly?

Molt bé, molt bé.

Very good, very good.

Number two, doncs fem entrega ara mateix de les croquetes de la meva mare.

Number two, so let's deliver my mother's croquettes right now.

Haig de dir que les croquetes han segut millor que els convidats

I have to say that the croquettes were better than the guests.

durant tot el programa.

throughout the entire program.

El number two, si no m'equivoco, li toca a vostè.

The number two, if I'm not mistaken, is your turn.

Bravo!

Bravo!

Que brava!

How fierce!

Com et diu?

What is your name?

Martina.

Martina.

Martina, mira, Martina, comptem que no caiguin, sisplau.

Martina, look, Martina, let’s make sure they don't fall, please.

Ara em fas patir molt, eh?

Now you make me suffer a lot, huh?

És com un iPhone, això, eh?

It's like an iPhone, this, huh?

Això m'ha molt enxerrit.

This has greatly surprised me.

Dos, quatre, sis, vuit...

Two, four, six, eight...

Les toco, les toco.

I touch them, I touch them.

Ai, no!

Oh, no!

Tretze croquetes.

Thirteen croquettes.

Però toco l'Ocovi, t'agraden les croquetes o no?

But I play the Ocovi, do you like croquettes or not?

Sí.

Yes.

Va, va.

Come on, come on.

És el sople preferit?

Is it the preferred blower?

Imagina't que no.

Imagine that not.

Pots, pots...

You can, you can...

Sí, home, doncs...

Yes, man, well...

Sí, la sopa i les croquetes.

Yes, the soup and the croquettes.

Bravo!

Bravo!

L'hem fet molt feliç ara mateix.

We have made him very happy right now.

La Martina, que jo he llegit a Twitter que ara te'n vas al soterrani.

Martina, I read on Twitter that you are now going to the basement.

I què faràs amb les croquetes?

And what will you do with the croquettes?

Ens les mengem amb la Gemma.

We eat them with Gemma.

Ah, vale, vale.

Ah, okay, okay.

I si voleu vosaltres, també.

And if you want, you too.

I després d'aquí aneu a veure gent de veritat que fa gràcia de veritat, no?

And after this, you go see real people who are really funny, right?

Va.

Okay.

Escolta, fes-me...

Listen, do me...

La Maria també hi és?

Is Maria there too?

Ah, sí, la Maria també hi és.

Ah, yes, Maria is there too.

Fes-me un favor, sisplau.

Do me a favor, please.

Mirant a la meva mare, que la tens tres files enrere,

Looking at my mother, whom you have three rows back,

pots menjar un tros de croqueta i dir-li que està superbona?

Can you eat a piece of croquette and tell her it's really good?

A veure.

Let's see.

Aquest és un moment històric.

This is a historic moment.

Quin moment, eh?

What a moment, huh?

La meva mare l'està mirant des de darrere.

My mother is watching her from behind.

A veure, a una mare no se le puede engañar, eh?

Let's see, you can't trick a mother, okay?

A veure.

Let's see.

Está muy bueno.

It's very good.

Gràcies!

Thank you!

Això és la família, sí, senyor.

This is family, yes, sir.

Tot queda en família.

Everything stays in the family.

Va, acabem amb música.

Come on, let's finish with music.

Ja ho sabeu.

You already know.

Sempre...

Always...

Una cançó, també, l'Ignasi...

A song too, Ignasi...

Una cançó, diu...

A song, it says...

Llegeixo.

I read.

Quan li vaig preguntar...

When I asked him...

Aquesta la vas entendre?

Did you understand this one?

Sí.

Yes.

Una cançó familiar...

A familiar song...

Hombre!

Man!

Oh, ha entès una pregunta!

Oh, he understood a question!

Bravo!

Bravo!

Al final, al final.

In the end, in the end.

Al final, l'Ignasi...

In the end, Ignasi...

Al final la vaig entendre.

In the end, I understood her.

Llegeixo.

I read.

Què explicava?

What was he/she explaining?

Diu...

He says...

Una cançó que cantàvem, no sé per quin motiu, que feia...

A song that we sang, I don't know why, that went...

Cote, cote, cote, cote...

Cote, cote, cote, cote...

Cote?

Cote?

Com?

How?

Veneix, senyor, aquesta taula.

Come, sir, this table.

Sí.

Yes.

Que no té cap sentit, perquè nosaltres no som gent religiosos.

That makes no sense, because we are not religious people.

No ho hem sigut mai.

We have never been.

No hem fet ni la comunió.

We haven't even done the communion.

Però la meva germana va anar de convivències, un estiu, a un campament...

But my sister went to a retreat one summer at a camp...

A una secta.

To a sect.

Sí.

Yes.

Els meus pares no es van informar molt sobre quin tipus de campament era,

My parents did not inquire much about what type of camp it was,

i va tornar catòlica extrem.

and became an extreme Catholic.

Però era com...

But it was like...

Que havia anat a fer...

What I had gone to do...

A evangelitzar, i era com...

To evangelize, and it was like...

En aquesta casa vivim amb...

In this house we live with...

I era com un hàbit i una cuerda, t'ho agraeixo.

It was like a habit and a rope, I thank you for it.

T'ho juro.

I swear to you.

Com de sobte és com en aquesta casa estem vivint en pecat,

How suddenly it is that in this house we are living in sin,

no estem beneint la taula, no sé què...

we are not blessing the table, I don't know what...

I fer-nos sentir malament a tota la resta.

And make us feel bad about everyone else.

Jo crec que també vaig anar a aquestes colònies, eh?

I think I also went to those camps, right?

Segurament.

Surely.

No sé...

I don't know...

No, perquè...

No, because...

A més, la cançó aquesta hi ha molta gent que la coneix.

Moreover, many people know this song.

Clar, i llavors, a partir d'aleshores...

Sure, and then, from that point onwards...

Com fa Ignasi.

How does Ignasi do it?

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

va anar el senyor a aquesta taula.

The gentleman went to this table.

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

i a tots nosaltres també.

and to all of us too.

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

Quack, quack, quack, quack,

va anar el senyor a aquesta taula.

The gentleman went to this table.

Vinga, una altra.

Come on, another one.

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

Cote, cote, cote, cote,

i a tots nosaltres també.

and to all of us as well.

M'agrada molt afegir com una clàusula...

I really like to add as a clause...

Cotet és una òptica.

Cotet is an optician.

...i a tots nosaltres també.

...and to all of us as well.

I a tots nosaltres també, no?

And to all of us as well, right?

Ja que estem en la veredicció.

Since we are in the verdict.

Però té una pregunta.

But he/she has a question.

Ja que estem fent aquesta petició, sí.

Since we are making this request, yes.

Aquí diuen si Cotet és una òptica,

Here they say if Cotet is an optician,

que això és una...

that this is a...

Sí.

Yes.

M'ha parecido com un jingle d'està fent el ràdio.

It seemed to me like a jingle that is being played on the radio.

És un jingle, és un jingle, sí, sí.

It's a jingle, it's a jingle, yes, yes.

De Cotet, d'Òptica és Cotet.

From Cotet, Optical is Cotet.

Jo crec que potser devia ser una cançó francesa,

I think it might have been a French song,

que devien dir Cotet...

what Cotet must have said...

Cotet...

Cotet...

Què pot voler dir Cotet?

What could Cotet mean?

Cotet és com...

Cotet is like...

Costat, no?

Side, right?

Costat.

Side.

Costat, costat, costat.

Side, side, side.

Costat, costat, costat, costat.

Side, side, side, side.

Bé, és senyor aquesta taula.

Well, this table is Mr.

No ho sé, una costella, costella.

I don't know, a rib, rib.

Costat, costat, costat.

Side, side, side.

La costella, la costella.

The rib, the rib.

La costella.

The rib.

No ho sé, vam estar cantant-la durant una setmana

I don't know, we were singing it for a week.

fins que a la meva germana ja se li va passar l'etapa catòlica

until my sister already passed her Catholic stage

i s'acabés bacantar, sí.

and it would end up being a joke, yes.

La germana és tal bomba de carisma, no?

The sister is such a charisma bomb, right?

Sí, és el heavy.

Yes, it's the heavy.

És el heavy.

He is the heavy.

Home, perquè ella tenia molt clar que anàvem a l'infern, si no...

At home, because she was very clear that we were going to hell if not...

Vull dir, va passar...

I mean, it happened...

I després DJ i bateria, pam.

And then DJ and drums, bam.

Exacte, pam.

Exactly, buddy.

Un cop va descobrir que era molt pesat cantar aquesta cançó

Once he discovered that it was very tedious to sing this song.

cada vegada que dinàvem,

every time we had lunch,

doncs va ser com, bueno, potser...

well, it was like, um, maybe...

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

No, esta familia.

No, this family.

També els seus arguments eren cançons, bàsicament,

Also, their arguments were basically songs,

que li havien ensenyat allí, com de dir,

what they had taught him there, how to say,

però això tu ho has pensat bé, l'assistència de Déu i tal.

but you have thought this through well, God's assistance and all that.

Cote, cote, cote, cote.

Cote, cote, cote, cote.

Havia massa arguments, diguéssim.

There were too many arguments, let's say.

Doncs aquesta no la podem posar, el Gerard no la pot posar,

Well, we can't use this one; Gerard can't use it.

per això l'hem cantat nosaltres,

that's why we sang it ourselves,

però, en canvi, sé que podem posar aquesta de Joaquim Sabina,

but, on the other hand, I know we can put this one by Joaquim Sabina,

que...

that...

No, no.

No, no.

No, sí.

No, yes.

Ja, ja, ja, ja, ja ho sé.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, yes, I know.

Acabarem amb Sabina.

We will end with Sabina.

Ho sento.

I'm sorry.

Però té un motiu.

But there is a reason.

No, bueno, un moment.

No, well, one moment.

Però la primera quina és?

But which one is the first?

Com es titula?

What is the title?

Muy bien, hasta ahora.

Very well, so far.

No, era...

No, it was...

Pero cómo que hermosas eran, no sé qué,

But how beautiful they were, I don't know what,

la mujer de la primera.

the woman of the first.

Sí, porque...

Yes, because...

¿Qué es eso?

What is that?

Pero esto es el droga, ¿no?

But this is the drug, right?

Esto es una pensación, la Sabina.

This is a thought, the Juniper.

Esto es de la Sagrera, alguien de la Sagrera, muy chungo, ¿no?

This is from La Sagrera, someone from La Sagrera, very sketchy, right?

Mi primera mujer era una arpía,

My first wife was a harpy.

pero, muchacho, el punto del gazpacho,

but, boy, the point of the gazpacho,

joder, sí lo tenía.

Damn, yes I had it.

Se llamaba, digamos, que Sofía.

Let's say her name was Sofia.

Así, hombre, ya sé cuál es esta, es verdad.

So, man, I already know which one this is, it’s true.

Un buen día, ¿no?

A nice day, isn't it?

Acabarían, esta era una arpía, esta era una puta,

They would end up, she was a harpy, she was a whore,

esta era no sé qué.

this era I don't know what.

Sí, sí, sí.

Yes, yes, yes.

Un sentú multisindex.

A multi-index scent.

La veritat, eh?

The truth, huh?

Espera, escoltem-la, ara posarem...

Wait, let's listen to it, now we will put...

Ah, que la posarem?

Ah, will we put it?

Sí, escolta-la, a veure, escolta-la.

Yes, listen to her, come on, listen to her.

Mi primera mujer era una arpía,

My first wife was a harpy,

pero, muchacho, el punto del gazpacho,

but, boy, the point of the gazpacho,

joder, sí lo tenía.

Fuck, yes I had it.

Se llamaba, digamos, que Sofía.

Let's say her name was Sofia.

Va, aquesta cançó és de l'època que el Sabina va revelar

Come on, this song is from the time when Sabina revealed it.

que tenia voz de cazallera, dels 500 dies,

that had the voice of a huntsman, of the 500 days,

quan va dir, ah, 500 dies, escoltes-nos.

When he said, ah, 500 days, listen to us.

Este fue productor, no?

He was a producer, right?

No li va fer ja vergonya dir que explicava cocaïna,

He was already ashamed to say that he was explaining cocaine.

saps lo que te digo ahí?

Do you know what I'm telling you there?

Ah, ahí te quiero ver.

Ah, that's where I want to see you.

Al pont d'aquí, cocaïna, aquí, no?

At the bridge here, cocaine, here, right?

Sí, aquí sí, però allà...

Yes, here yes, but there...

És un podcast, és un podcast.

It's a podcast, it's a podcast.

I llavors és una cinta que el meu pare tenia,

And then it’s a tape that my father had,

el Renault 21, un cotxe bellíssim,

the Renault 21, a very beautiful car,

que tenia només dos cintes,

that had only two ribbons,

Pájaros de Barro i la de...

Clay Birds and the...

Pájaros de Barro.

Clay Birds.

Qué imagen.

What an image.

Ya está.

That's it.

Era aquesta, era aquesta.

It was this one, it was this one.

Qué puesta, qué puesta.

What a sunset, what a sunset.

La posava sempre de camí del poble a casa

She always put it on the way from the village to home.

y la tinc ya atrapasada,

and I have already captured it,

pero es como...

but it's like...

Pero de ella, el gazpacho, el punto del gazpacho,

But from her, the gazpacho, the point of the gazpacho,

y a mí aquello...

and to me that...

Però, ja que hi som,

But, since we are here,

llegeix-la una mica poèticament, sisplau,

read it a little poetically, please,

com si fessis...

as if you were doing...

Té unes estrofes que són magistrales.

It has some stanzas that are masterful.

Sí, sense...

Yes, without...

Però és llarguíssima.

But it is very long.

Bueno, no, al principi...

Well, no, at the beginning...

Aquí posarem una reverb, també,

Here we will also put a reverb.

per acabar, una mica de poesia.

To finish, a little poetry.

Vale, vale.

Okay, okay.

Vinga, va, Raquel, endavant.

Come on, Raquel, go ahead.

Mi primera mujer era una arpía,

My first wife was a harpy,

pero, muchacho, el punto del gazpacho,

but, boy, the point of the gazpacho,

joder, sí lo tenía.

Damn, yes I had it.

Se llamaba, digamos, que Sofía,

Let's say her name was Sofia.

un maletero.

a trunk.

Un maletero.

A trunk.

Al día, me puso las maletas

In the day, he/she packed my bags.

a los pies de una estatua de un poeta,

at the feet of a statue of a poet,

que está inmortalizado en su glorieta.

that is immortalized in his gazebo.

Poeta, glorieta.

Poet, gazebo.

Aquesta és fàcil, no?

This is easy, isn't it?

Bicicleta.

Bicycle.

Después, no se asombre registrar a su nombre

Later, do not be surprised to register in your name.

mi chalet adosado, mi vida,

my townhouse, my life,

mi pasado, su prisa y su futuro,

my past, his haste, and his future,

dejándome tirado y sin un duro.

leaving me stranded and broke.

Bravo, bravo, bravo.

Bravo, bravo, bravo.

La arpía que se queda...

The harpy that stays...

Yo he de dir que yo porto

I have to say that I carry

un tatuaje de Joaquín Sabina.

a tattoo of Joaquín Sabina.

Oh, no, por favor.

Oh, no, please.

Me he de confesar.

I have to confess.

La cara del Sabina.

The face of Sabina.

No, no, una frase.

No, no, just one sentence.

Tienes un tatuatge de Sabina?

Do you have a tattoo of Sabina?

Sí, tenies de xanxera intensa y era como si...

Yes, you had intense chutzpah and it was like...

Però quina frase? A veure, ja té frases bones.

But which sentence? Let's see, it already has good sentences.

També t'ho diré.

I will tell you too.

No m'ho puc creure.

I can't believe it.

A mi no sé si aquesta és puta Catalunya.

I don't know if this is whore Catalunya to me.

Viva Murcia.

Long live Murcia.

Hòstia, no, ¿cómo era la frase?

Holy shit, no, what was the phrase?

Es tu tatuaje.

It's your tattoo.

No te lo ves cada día.

You don't see it every day.

Era una mala tarde la tiene cualquiera.

It was a bad afternoon that anyone can have.

¿Qué pone?

What does it say?

Que al lugar donde has sido feliz no deberás nunca volver.

That to the place where you have been happy you should never return.

Eso, eso, se me ha olvidado.

There, there, I've forgotten that.

¿Cómo, cómo?

How, how?

Que al lugar donde has sido feliz no debieras tratar de volver.

That in the place where you were happy, you should not try to return.

Ahora más repente...

Now more suddenly...

Es que me han parado de echar noticias.

It's just that they have stopped sending me news.

Ya, tenías hecha...

Yeah, you had done it...

Ahora, tío, estoy súper...

Now, dude, I'm super...

No pasa re, no pasa re.

It's okay, it's okay.

¿Al Juanjo Sasquín a él le agrada?

Does Juanjo Sasquín like him?

¿Cuál?

Which one?

La de con las manos en la masa.

Caught red-handed.

Niña, vengo del trabajo

Girl, I come from work.

y no me apetece pato chino

and I don't feel like Chinese duck

a ver si me aliñas

let's see if you spice me up

un gazpacho con su ajo

a gazpacho with its garlic

y su pepino.

and his cucumber.

¿Quién le está cantando algo por aquí, també?

Who is singing something around here, too?

A l'Adam Martín, també.

To Adam Martín, as well.

Acabem amb un dúo, vine, vine, vine.

Let's finish with a duo, come, come, come.

Acabem amb un dúo.

Let's finish with a duo.

La croqueta és súper llista, no?

The croquette is super clever, right?

No me vengas con mierda.

Don't come to me with crap.

És súper llista, no?

She's super smart, isn't she?

Dona-li-me'l, va, a veure que la canti l'Adam Martín.

Give it to me, come on, let's see Adam Martín sing it.

Quina?

Which one?

Si no sé cantar, jo.

If I can't sing, then.

No vols menjar de croqueta?

Don't you want to eat a croquette?

Y no me apetece pato chino

And I don't feel like Chinese duck.

a ver si me aliñas

let's see if you spice me up

un gazpacho con su ajo

a gazpacho with its garlic

y su pepino.

and his cucumber.

Ya lo sé.

I already know.

El pato chino es no me vengas con mierda.

The Chinese duck is not coming to me with bullshit.

Caldereta.

Stew.

Migas con chocolate.

Bread crumbs with chocolate.

Cebolleta, vinagreta,

Chives, vinaigrette,

morteruelo.

mortar.

Bacalao al pipil.

Cod with pipil sauce.

Pues tampoco un poquito de perejil.

Well, not even a little bit of parsley.

Això que és com un menú, no?

Is this like a menu, right?

Maravillós.

Wonderful.

Era la cançó d'un programa de cuina.

It was the song from a cooking show.

Ah, jo pensava que era la cançó de la loteria.

Oh, I thought it was the lottery song.

Hi havia un programa de cuina que es deia

There was a cooking show that was called

Con las manos en la masa, que aquesta era la cançó.

With hands in the dough, that was the song.

Ara fem la votació.

Now we are going to vote.

Qui vol que aquest tros el traiem del programa?

Who wants us to take this part out of the program?

No, no.

No, no.

No, que es quedi, que es quedi, que es quedi.

No, let it stay, let it stay, let it stay.

Que es quedi.

Let it stay.

Família, moltíssimes gràcies.

Family, thank you very much.

Ignasi Daltavuil, Gràcies a vosaltres.

Ignasi Daltavuil, Thank you all.

Gràcies.

Thank you.

Ara don Martín, la meva mare, vosaltres tots.

Now Don Martín, my mother, all of you.

La família Líbia i la Llama.

The Líbia family and the Llama.

Gràcies.

Thank you.