1x05 - Chimo Bayo va predir les fases de la desescalada
Tresdeu
El Cherrydiàling, amb Cèlia Cerezo
1x05 - Chimo Bayo va predir les fases de la desescalada
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I gire tota el voltant de l'estada mentre es dansa, dansa.
And I turn all around the room while dancing, dancing.
Hola de nou! Salutacions de qui vos parla, Celia Cerezo.
Hello again! Greetings from the one who speaks to you, Celia Cerezo.
Com van eixos cabells? Ja ho han atat les perruqueries?
How are those hairs? Have the hair salons already tied them up?
O heu reconsiderat la idea de pareixer el xihuaca després de córrer la Marató de València?
Or have you reconsidered the idea of resembling the xihuaca after running the Valencia Marathon?
Melenudes i despentinades.
Mopheads and messy-haired.
Què és ese animal?
What is that animal?
Sembla que després d'unes setmanes de confinament,
It seems that after a few weeks of confinement,
comencem a vore una mica...
let's start to see a little...
Què tal la llum al final del túnel?
How is the light at the end of the tunnel?
Ja podem fer esport i córrer a l'aire lliure.
We can now play sports and run outdoors.
Estáis corriendo por encima de vuestras posibilidades.
You are running above your means.
O també fer un bon esmorzarot en la terrassa.
Or also have a nice breakfast on the terrace.
Però ei, alerta!
But hey, watch out!
Encara queden més esforços per combatre este maleït virus
There are still more efforts needed to combat this cursed virus.
que ha trastornat les nostres vides per complet.
that has completely disrupted our lives.
Ja no us suporte més.
I can't take it anymore.
Cal ser cívics i no votar-nos les normes sanitàries,
We must be civic and not vote against the health regulations.
i de confinament.
and of confinement.
Tingueu molt de coneixement.
Have a lot of knowledge.
Efectivament, senyora.
Indeed, madam.
Tal volta, escoltes este podcast en ple mes de juny,
Perhaps you are listening to this podcast in the middle of June,
en fase 2, o en fase 3, o en fase 1.
in phase 2, or in phase 3, or in phase 1.
A este pas, tal volta ens quedem en fase 1 de perdida.
At this rate, we might end up stuck in phase 1 of loss.
Està tot molt mal.
Everything is very bad.
O ja que estem, des del planeta de Mart, en fase postapocalíptica.
Oh, since we are at it, from the planet Mars, in a post-apocalyptic phase.
També pot ser escoltes este xerridialing en ple estiu,
You can also hear this chatter in the middle of summer,
en eixa nova normalitat,
in that new normality,
o, al contrari, en ple desembre de 2020,
or, on the contrary, in the middle of December 2020,
i a punt d'acomiadar un any tan difícil que ens costarà d'oblidar.
and about to bid farewell to a year so difficult that it will be hard to forget.
Siga com siga, vivim moments històrics,
Whatever the case, we are living through historic moments,
i passarem un any i un estiu molt estrany.
We will spend a very strange year and summer.
Me cagues en la puta, mare!
I swear, damn it, mother!
I enmig d'esta crisi sanitària pel coronavirus,
And in the midst of this health crisis due to the coronavirus,
el xerridialing continua amb les pèties i moments graciosos
the chatter continues with the petty and funny moments
de la ràdio d'Apunt.
from the Apunt radio.
Tot queda dit.
Everything is said.
Ah, sí!
Ah, yes!
Tirar la rodeta!
Throw the wheel!
Sí, primera parada a Madrid.
Yes, first stop in Madrid.
Des de Maria Forneres a Costa,
From Maria Forneres to Costa,
tot seguit els temes i les cites que avui es dissaran els principals titulars.
Next are the topics and quotes that will highlight today's main headlines.
Bon dia!
Good morning!
Aquí convida!
Here is an invitation!
Maria, bon dia!
Maria, good morning!
Hi ha algú aquí convida!
Is there anyone here inviting?
Sí, continuem mentre esperem a obrir la connexió.
Yes, let's continue while we wait to open the connection.
Sembla que no poden contactar amb la nostra companya.
It seems they cannot contact our colleague.
Maria Sassapul.
Maria Sassapul.
Hola!
Hello!
Maria, bon dia!
Maria, good morning!
Poden escoltar-me!
Can you hear me!
Maria Sassapul.
Maria Sassapul.
Continuem el nombre de...
We continue the number of...
A eixa reunió que tindrà lloc la setmana que ve,
To that meeting that will take place next week,
Maria Fuster està seguint...
Maria Fuster is following...
Maria Fuster.
Maria Fuster.
I una servidora que els parla, Maria Fuster.
And a servant who speaks to you, Maria Fuster.
També Maria Forner està seguint, també.
Also Maria Forner is following, too.
Prima.
Thin.
Mangana.
Mangana.
I també raonem de tota sort amb el doctor Juan Antonio Navarro Alonso,
And we also reason with all sorts with Dr. Juan Antonio Navarro Alonso,
membre de l'Espanya.
member of Spain.
Som membre de l'Espanya.
We are members of Spain.
Paren les rotatives!
Stop the presses!
Som membre de l'Espanya.
We are a member of Spain.
Carida Espanya, esta España mía, esta España nuestra.
Dear Spain, this Spain of mine, this Spain of ours.
Creo que voy a votar.
I think I am going to vote.
Asociació Espanyola de Vacunología, molt bon dia.
Spanish Association of Vaccinology, good morning.
Hola, bon dia.
Hello, good morning.
Soy José Antonio, no Juan Antonio.
I am José Antonio, not Juan Antonio.
A ningú que li pase.
To no one may it happen.
José Antonio, disculpe.
José Antonio, excuse me.
Disculpe per rebatejar-lo.
Sorry for rebranding you.
Perdóname.
Forgive me.
Soy José Antonio, no Juan Antonio.
I am José Antonio, not Juan Antonio.
La tertúlia en Apunt, les notícies de la nit.
The talk show on Apunt, the night news.
Després de saludar Laura Ballester, periodista de Levante...
After greeting Laura Ballester, journalist from Levante...
Presente!
Present!
David Burguera, periodista de les províncies...
David Burguera, journalist from the provinces...
Presente!
Present!
Querido profesor...
Dear teacher...
Sí, Loreto Chando...
Yes, Loreto Chando...
Presente!
Present!
Periodista de València Plaza...
Journalist from València Plaza...
Perdón, por llegar tarde.
Sorry for being late.
Els preguntem precisament això.
We ask them precisely that.
Com parla?
How does he/she speak?
porten el confinament.
they carry the confinement.
Se'ns ha fet més llar
It has become more like home to us.
que un estiu sense aire condicionat.
that a summer without air conditioning.
Companys, companyes,
Comrades, ladies and gentlemen,
companys, companyes, com esteu?
friends, how are you?
Molt bé.
Very good.
Però de categoria.
But of category.
Molt bé.
Very well.
O ja, perdó, al Regne Unit.
Oh right, sorry, in the United Kingdom.
Perquè estem en Estamor.
Because we are in Estamor.
Per exemple, no?
For example, right?
És que jo no ho sé.
I don’t know.
O a França.
Or to France.
Ai, sí.
Oh, yes.
O a Estats Units.
Or to the United States.
Sonríe, sonríe.
Smile, smile.
Quiero que sonrías.
I want you to smile.
Esto es tuyo, es tu sonrisa.
This is yours, it is your smile.
Que te den allí.
To hell with you there.
Y al Regne...
And to the Kingdom...
Perdón.
Sorry.
Disculpe.
Excuse me.
Si yo chue, me fumo la bola.
If I smoke, I smoke the ball.
Perdón.
Sorry.
Podrás equivocarle lo que está frente al gobierno así, pero...
You may be able to blame what is in front of the government like that, but...
Perdón.
Sorry.
La bola se me va para caer el coronavirus.
The ball is going to fall for the coronavirus.
Perdón.
Sorry.
¿Por qué?
Why?
¿Por qué usted se está harto?
Why are you getting fed up?
El problema es que me he comido una almendra
The problem is that I ate an almond.
justo antes.
just before.
Sí, ahora, ahora, ahora.
Yes, now, now, now.
Me alivia de poner el que está decidiendo
It relieves me to put the one who is deciding.
respecto a los países.
regarding the countries.
Calla, ahora.
Be quiet, now.
Respecto a los países.
Regarding the countries.
¡Ay, por favor, un médico, por favor, un médico!
Oh, please, a doctor, please, a doctor!
Bebe agua, Laura, por Dios, bebe agua.
Drink water, Laura, for God's sake, drink water.
No se preocupen, ya está solucionado.
Don't worry, it is already solved.
Bebe agua.
Drink water.
De hecho, el agua deshidrata más de lo que hidrata.
In fact, water dehydrates more than it hydrates.
Laura, por Dios, bebe agua.
Laura, for God’s sake, drink water.
La bola se me va para caer el coronavirus.
The ball is going to fall on the coronavirus.
Son les 10.
It is 10 o'clock.
Apunt.
Note.
Noticias.
News.
Bona nit.
Good night.
La Unió d'Actors i Actrius ha donat un vot de confiança al govern espanyol.
The Union of Actors and Actresses has given a vote of confidence to the Spanish government.
Esto no tiene perdón de Dios, eh.
This is unforgivable, huh.
Després de les paraules de la ministra d'Hisenda, María Jesús Montero.
After the words of the Minister of Finance, María Jesús Montero.
¿Dónde te lleva Montero?
Where does Montero take you?
No te lleva nadie.
No one is taking you.
El món cultural espera que les paraules de la ministra de...
The cultural world expects that the words of the minister of...
¡Pue!
Well!
De la ministra, en este cas, de...
From the minister, in this case, of...
Teniu que estar pensant.
You must be thinking.
¡Ay!
Oh!
De Hisenda esdevinguen una realitat.
From the Treasury they become a reality.
Desanuncio...
I unannounce...
Per ordre de l'alcalde es fa saber tothom.
By order of the mayor, everyone is hereby informed.
Que s'han establegut quatre fases a lo largo d'esta desescalada.
That four phases have been established throughout this de-escalation.
Que la fera ferotge ja no ens treurà la son.
That the ferocious beast will no longer take our sleep away.
Que vamos a caminar a lo largo de les pròximes setmanes.
That we are going to walk over the next few weeks.
I gràcies a la força no passa res de nou.
And thanks to the strength, nothing new happens.
Quatre, quatre, quatre, quatre.
Four, four, four, four.
Quasi.
Almost.
La primera fase, o fase cero, es la fase preparatòria.
The first phase, or phase zero, is the preparatory phase.
Uno.
One.
¿Esto qué significa?
What does this mean?
Que no para ninguno.
That doesn't stop anyone.
La fase uno.
Phase one.
Dos.
Two.
¿Esto qué significa?
What does this mean?
Nos movemos los dos.
We both move.
La fase dos.
Phase two.
Tres.
Three.
¿Esto qué significa?
What does this mean?
Lo mismo, pero al revés.
The same, but the other way around.
La fase tercera.
The third phase.
Cuatro.
Four.
¿Esto qué significa?
What does this mean?
Me voy a la parra un rato.
I'm going to daydream for a while.
Al concluir estas tres fases...
Upon completing these three phases...
Cinco, bailo y brinco, y seis, no me veis.
Five, I dance and jump, and six, you don't see me.
...habrá concluido la desescalada...
...the de-escalation will have concluded...
...y podremos decir...
...and we will be able to say...
¡Múvete otra vez!
Move again!
Hemos escoltat el president del govern, Pedro Sánchez,
We have heard the president of the government, Pedro Sánchez.
explicant en què consistirán
explaining what they will consist of
ixes quatre fases de desescalada.
those four phases of de-escalation.
Tant era un...
It was both a...
No, no, no, no lo entiendo.
No, no, no, I do not understand.
Pues muchísimas gracias a los medios de comunicación
Well, thank you very much to the media.
por su trabajo.
for his work.
Clar, clar, clar.
Of course, of course, of course.
Escolta, tú sabes una cosa.
Listen, you know one thing.
A mí me encanta.
I love it.
Mira qué suena.
Look what it sounds like.
¿Qué suena?
What sounds?
A ver.
Let's see.
Resistiré.
I will resist.
No!
No!
Na, na, na, na, na, na.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
No!
No!
Y acabemos en resistiré, que es más bonito que el que yo no he abadido.
And we end up with "I will resist," which is nicer than "I have not succeeded."
Mentira.
Lie.
Qué mentiroso.
What a liar.
Callaos, hipoglúcidos.
Shut up, hypoglycemics.
A punt.
Ready.
Les notícies del cap de setmana.
The weekend news.
De l'altra titular del dia passa per la polèmica
The other headline of the day involves the controversy.
que s'ha obert entre el govern valencià i l'espanyol.
that has opened between the Valencian and Spanish governments.
La cagada és important.
The crap is important.
Per la decisió de no permetre que tota la comunitat valenciana...
For the decision not to allow the entire Valencian community...
En el punto en el que estamos de concurso,
At the point we are in the competition,
en el que ya todo es muy sutil y muy delicadito...
in which everything is very subtle and very delicate...
Passe a la fase 1 de la desescalada...
I move to phase 1 of the de-escalation...
Te tengamos que proponer para que abandones la cadena.
We have to propose to you that you leave the chain.
Una decisió que l'executiu valencià no compartís.
A decision that the Valencian executive did not share.
¡Gracias!
Thank you!
La consellera de Sanitat ha dit este matí...
The Minister of Health said this morning...
Buenos días.
Good morning.
...que espera que dilluns el Ministeri rectifiqui.
...that hopes that the Ministry will rectify on Monday.
Salud que tengan, pero pareu, por favor.
Health to you all, but please stop.
Ana Barceló.
Ana Barceló.
Seguiremos trabajando.
We will continue working.
Bien, estamos trabajando en ello.
Alright, we are working on it.
Precisamente para que nos revisen ese examen.
Precisely so that they can review that exam.
Y hemos dedicado tiempo ayer por la noche y esta mañana a trabajar en ello.
And we spent time last night and this morning working on it.
Y podamos seguir adelante.
And we can move forward.
Buenas noches.
Good evening.
La Generalitat Valenciana no comparte...
The Valencian Government does not share...
No, hoy no estamos de acuerdo.
No, today we do not agree.
...la decisión adoptada por el Ministerio de Sanidad...
...the decision adopted by the Ministry of Health...
No estamos en nada de acuerdo.
We do not agree on anything.
...que solo pasarán a la fase 1 de la desescalada 10 de los departamentos de salud de la Comunitat Valenciana.
...that only 10 of the health departments of the Valencian Community will move to phase 1 of the de-escalation.
Creemos que hay gente que ha cruzado la pasarela...
We believe that there are people who have crossed the walkway...
...sin reunir, al menos, los criterios que sí que reúne la Comunitat Valenciana.
...without meeting, at least, the criteria that the Valencian Community does meet.
...que no lo ha hecho...
...that he/she hasn't done it...
...tan bien como para cruzarla.
...as well as to cross it.
No entendemos por qué no podemos pasar a la fase 1.
We do not understand why we cannot move to phase 1.
Y que hay alguno que está nominado que no debería.
And there is someone who is nominated who shouldn't be.
Estando en muchísimas mejores condiciones que otras comunidades autónomas.
Being in much better conditions than other autonomous communities.
No he recibido ninguna respuesta.
I have not received any response.
Ni objetiva ni técnica.
Neither objective nor technical.
¿Y qué diuen desde el Gobern?
And what are they saying from the Government?
Pero esto es normal.
But this is normal.
Que la decisió de quins territoris pasen de fase o no s'ha pres seguint criteris científics.
That the decision of which territories move to the next phase or not has been made based on scientific criteria.
Ellos tienen una percepción, nosotros tenemos otra.
They have one perception, we have another.
Ho ha dit fa uns minuts Pedro Sánchez.
Pedro Sánchez said it a few minutes ago.
Y ya está.
And that's it.
Pero también el responsable del Comité Científic, Fernando Simón.
But also the head of the Scientific Committee, Fernando Simón.
Estamos consiguiendo realmente el impacto que esperábamos.
We are really achieving the impact we expected.
Que ha afegit que a partir de dilluns...
He has added that starting from Monday...
Sí, mañana tenemos telita que cortar el repaso de gala.
Yes, tomorrow we have a lot to cover in the gala review.
...lo mirarán de nuevo.
...they will look at it again.
Estamos aquí, Manu y yo, cogiendo apuntes.
We are here, Manu and I, taking notes.
Tenemos unos factores asociados a la transmisión de la epidemia.
We have some factors associated with the transmission of the epidemic.
Pero es una cosa que això no té caps ni peus.
But it's something that doesn't make any sense.
En algunos departamentos...
In some departments...
Això no té base científica.
This has no scientific basis.
...todavía no están en la situación que nos permita tomar la decisión de pasar a fase 1.
...they are still not in the situation that allows us to make the decision to move to phase 1.
O a cuarentena o la fem tots.
Either in quarantine or we all do it.
Bon dia, bon diumenge, tot i el coronavirus.
Good morning, good Sunday, despite the coronavirus.
Cuida't, que anda por ahí, coronavirus.
Take care, because the coronavirus is out there.
Cuida't, que anda por ahí.
Take care, it's out there.
Coronavirus.
Coronavirus.
Corona, corona, corona, corona, chamau.
Crown, crown, crown, crown, buddy.
Coronavirus.
Coronavirus.
Corona, corona, corona, corona, corona, chamau.
Crown, crown, crown, crown, crown, kid.
Coronavirus.
Coronavirus.
Hi vídeo.
Hi video.
Ens passa el mateix a tots i a dies, que tenim ganes d'eixir de casa.
It happens to all of us some days, that we feel like going out of the house.
I jo me quedo en causa.
And I stay in cause.
Eixir de casa, d'eixir, d'eixi, d'eixir.
To go out of the house, to go out, to go out, to go out.
Nadir en eixir.
Nadir at dawn.
El noi que sempre.
The boy who always.
Eixir, d'eixir, d'eixir, d'eixir.
To exit, to exit, to exit, to exit.
Mentir-me en mitalla.
Lie to me halfway.
Hablar con la gente.
Talk with people.
Nos han llevat el cap, eixir.
They have taken our heads, to go out.
i ens frustra que la màxima siga anar a tirar el fem.
And it frustrates us that the main goal is to go throw the garbage.
A tirar la bessura,
To take out the trash,
que és de les poques coses que encara podem fer,
that is one of the few things we can still do,
perquè això no ho han prohibit.
because this has not been prohibited.
Però vaja, en alguns treballs i situacions...
But well, in some jobs and situations...
Eh? Eh?
Huh? Huh?
I situacions...
And situations...
M'he coput!
I've hurt myself!
...situacions, etsir, emdeixir de manera obligada,
...situations, to be forced to leave,
així que ànim.
So cheer up.
Gràcies, Maria Ibarz, des de Benissar.
Thank you, Maria Ibarz, from Benissar.
Recordeu que podeu enviar-vos les nostres...
Remember that you can send us your...
Que podeu enviar-vos les nostres...
That you can send us your...
Puedo haber metido la mano, lo he dicho mil veces,
I may have stuck my hand in, I've said it a thousand times,
pero nunca la pata.
but never the leg.
Les vull. Ho he dit tot mal.
I want them. I said it all wrong.
Lo he dicho al revés, ah!
I said it the other way around, ah!
Ho he dit tot mal.
I have said it all wrong.
Podeu enviar-nos les vostres peticions
You can send us your requests.
al telèfon del programa 600 013 303.
on the program's phone 600 013 303.
600 013 303.
600 013 303.
I vaja, sabeu quin és el telèfon del programa, no?
And well, you know what the program's phone number is, right?
El 600 013 303.
The 600 013 303.
Eh... podeu seguir enviant-vos...
Eh... you can keep sending each other...
Podeu seguir enviant-vos...
You can continue sending each other...
enviant-nos les vostres peticions musicals
sending us your music requests
durant este confinament,
during this confinement,
mentre dura l'estat d'alarma.
while the state of alarm lasts.
Segurament hi ha una roda de premsa a les 11 i mitja, val?
There is probably a press conference at 11:30, right?
Per a que ho tingues en compte.
So that you take it into account.
No ho entenc.
I don't understand.
Hola consellera, buenos días
Hello counselor, good morning.
Buenos días
Good morning
¿En qué más tienen estas zonas en común?
What else do these areas have in common?
Gracias
Thank you
Decirle que no es que no queramos publicarlo
Tell him that it's not that we don't want to publish it.
Lo que decimos es que
What we are saying is that
tendrá que medirse con
he will have to measure himself against
Le estamos escuchando el teclado
We are listening to the keyboard.
El teclado
The keyboard
Usted a lo mejor no se da cuenta
You might not realize.
Pero estamos escuchando cómo está tecleando
But we are listening to how you are typing.
Que es la máquina de escribir, ¿eh?
What is the typewriter, huh?
Del héroe Anderson
Of the hero Anderson
Le estamos escuchando el teclado
We are listening to the keyboard.
Y una pesa que hoy en día no se puede hacer
And a weight that cannot be made nowadays.
porque usted tiene una tablet
because you have a tablet
La cola se me va para caer el coronavirus
The queue is going to fall for the coronavirus.
I fins així esta nova entrega del Cherry Dialing
And so ends this new installment of the Cherry Dialing.
Espero que us hagi servit per animar-vos
I hope it has helped to encourage you.
d'entretant de desfici i enclaustrament
of distraction from despair and confinement
Com vedi la vostra cançó de Prozac Su
How do you see your Prozac Su song?
voldria veure-vos dansar ben pront
I would like to see you dance very soon.
Però encara hem d'esperar un poquet
But we still have to wait a little bit.
I recordeu, rieu, rieu
And remember, laugh, laugh.
que el món s'acaba
that the world is ending
Adeu, fins la pròxima
Goodbye, see you next time.
Fins la pròxima
Until next time.
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