月底了，姨妈该敲门了

每个月总有几天

There are always a few days in every month.

寂寞的卵子等不到属于他的那颗精子

The lonely egg waits for the sperm that belongs to it.

就会席卷子宫内膜

It will sweep through the endometrium.

化化成一道红色闪电

Transform into a red lightning bolt.

香消玉蕴

Fragrance vanishes, beauty remains.

坠落阴道深渊

Falling into the abyss of the vagina.

洞流寂寞蔓延

The cave flows with loneliness spreading.

这闪电便是姨妈的化身

This lightning is the embodiment of my aunt.

女人作为这个地球上最高端最大气的生物

Women are the most sophisticated and elegant beings on this planet.

她们温柔美丽善良大方

They are gentle, beautiful, kind, and generous.

她们和玫瑰唯一的区别就是她们更善解人意

The only difference between them and roses is that they are more understanding.

但是这个每个月都有那么几天流血不止

But there are several days each month when the bleeding doesn’t stop.

却不死的生物

Immortal creatures.

男人们不要以为她们很坚强

Men should not think that they are very strong.

她们需要的是你的体贴

What they need is your thoughtfulness.

你的关心

Your concern.

你的呵护

Your care.

大部分女生在大姨妈来的时候

Most girls experience...

就像一座火火山一样

Like a volcano.

腰酸腹痛脾气暴躁

Lower back pain, abdominal pain, and irritability.

站着坐着躺着各种姿势都不爽

No position feels comfortable whether standing, sitting, or lying down.

随时可能爆发

It could erupt at any time.

作为男人

As a man

首先要知道的是

First of all, it is important to know that...

别只会说

Don't just talk.

多喝水啊

Drink more water!

感冒了让她多喝水

She should drink more water since she has a cold.

上火了让她多喝水

If she has heatiness, let her drink more water.

大姨妈来了让她多喝水

When she's on her period, let her drink more water.

甚至连口腔贵阳都让她多喝水

Even her oral cavity in Guiyang reminds her to drink more water.

你当自己女朋友是水桶吗

Do you think your girlfriend is a bucket?

你可以试着这么做

You can try doing it this way.

尽量让着她

Try to accommodate her as much as possible.

星期三到七天不放假

No days off from Wednesday to Sunday.

已经是劳动法的bug了

It's already a bug in the labor law.

请不要试着触碰家法

Please do not attempt to provoke family discipline.

尽量逗得开心

Try to make them happy.

写情诗

Write a love poem.

送鲜花

Send flowers.

讲冷笑话

Tell a cold joke.

诸如此类等等等等

And so on and so forth.

总之就是像逮住祭典一样

In short, it's like catching a festival.

抓住她的笑点

Catch her sense of humor.

别让她吃现在不该吃的东西

Don't let her eat things she shouldn't eat right now.

火锅

Hot pot

pass

pass

麻辣炭

Spicy charcoal

pass

pass

冰激凌

Ice cream

pass

pass

辛辣生冷等刺激性食品

Spicy, raw, and other刺激性 foods.

该pass的一定要pass

Those that should be passed must be passed.

这一点绝对不能惯着她

This point definitely cannot be spoiled for her.

可以的话

If possible.

洗完洗衣服

Finished washing the clothes.

洗床单

Wash the sheets.

洗被罩

Wash the duvet cover.

除了洗澡

Besides taking a shower.

她可以自力更生之外

She can be self-reliant.

沾凉水的活都应该

All tasks involving cool water should be...

而且必须是你的

And it must be yours.

督促她穿暖和一点

Remind her to dress warmly.

帮她热敷小肚子

Help her apply a hot compress to her lower abdomen.

这样有利于缓解子宫痉挛

This helps relieve uterine cramps.

学会计算经期

Learn to calculate the menstrual cycle.

小学的时候

In elementary school.

学数学不及格也不重要

Failing math is not important.

网上有排卵器和安全器的计算器

There are calculators for ovulators and contraceptives online.

最后

Finally

了解一些日常卫生巾的牌子

Learn about some common brands of sanitary napkins.

日用的还是夜用的

Day use or night use?

长的还是短的

Long or short?

如果缺了就去买

If something is missing, go buy it.

别不好意思

Don't be shy.

总之

In summary.

你现在的所作所为

Your current actions.

都是发自内心的告诉她

All came from the heart to tell her.

你爱她

You love her.

话说回来

That being said.

没有男友的姑娘们

Girls without boyfriends.

也不需孤影自怜

There’s no need to pity oneself in solitude.

在特殊的日子里

On special days

请你比平时更爱惜自己

Please cherish yourself more than usual.

没有人给你关心

No one cares about you.

那就躺下来

Then lie down.

好好休息

Rest well.

睡觉

Sleep

手不能沾凉水时

When hands cannot touch cold water.

家务就过几天再做

I'll do the housework in a few days.

没有人冲牛奶

No one is rushing the milk.

冲红灯水

Running a red light.

那么就试着自己做

Then try to do it yourself.

当然

Of course.

即使你很坚强

Even if you are very strong.

但请记住

But please remember

也许就在某一天

Maybe one day.

你的爱情一定会如约而至

Your love will definitely arrive as promised.

那时候

At that time

请把以上的建议给她看

Please show her the above suggestions.

并且告诉她

And tell her.

你这些年来的委屈

The grievances you've endured over the years.

相信你以后的人生中

I believe in your future life.

一定有满满的关爱

There must be abundant love.

更何况

Moreover

别哭 CHEERING

Don't cry, CHEERING.

喜欢今天的视频

I like today's video.

请订阅订阅der kingdom

Please subscribe to der kingdom.

用语言提供更多 charges

Provide more charges with language.

同并上传三 Mmm

Same and upload three Mmm.

第一次 this

The first time this.