どれだけ願っても叶わないたった１つの事❤︎ from Radiotalk

こんばんは、ゆうこです。今日もママという生き方をお届けしていこうと思います。

Good evening, this is Yuko. Today, I would like to continue sharing the way of life as a mom.

今日のテーマは、どれだけ願っても叶わないたった一つのこと。これをテーマにお話ししていこうと思います。

Today's theme is the one thing that, no matter how much you wish for it, cannot come true. I would like to talk about this theme.

皆さんどうでしょう?どれだけ願っても叶わないたった一つのことって何か思い浮かびますか?

How about everyone? Can you think of that one thing that no matter how much you wish for it, it will never come true?

私はね、ほとんど自分がこれやりたいとか、これ絶対欲しいっていうものは全て手に入れて、やりたいことは全部叶えてきている。

You know, I've basically obtained everything I wanted and have achieved all the things I wanted to do.

そんな生き方ができている。ありがたいことに。だけれども、たった一つだけ叶わないこと。

I am able to live that kind of life. I am grateful for that. However, there is just one thing that cannot come true.

これはね、もう一度ママになりたい。これだけはどれだけ願っても、どれだけ頑張っても。

This is it, I want to be a mom again. No matter how much I wish for it, or how hard I try.

手に入らないっていうことなんです。当たり前だよね。

It means that it can't be obtained. That's obvious, right?

人間にはさ、やっぱり賞味期限だけではなくて、消費期限っていうものが当たり前にある。

Humans naturally have not only a best-by date but also a use-by date.

この地球に誕生した以上は、この地球を去っていくというこの消費期限だけではなくて、

Once born on this planet, it's not just the expiration date of leaving this Earth that matters,

特に女性にはさ、例えばよ、50歳になって普通に妊娠して出産しようと。

Especially for women, for example, to become pregnant and give birth normally at the age of 50.

と思っても、自然の流れで考えたら、まあこれ不可能だよね。でしょ?

Even if you think so, if you consider it in the flow of nature, well, this is impossible, right?

私、なんでこれ思ったかっていうと、娘がね、今子育て中で、孫姫ちゃんが6歳になったんですよ。

The reason I thought about this is that my daughter is currently raising her child, and my granddaughter has turned 6 years old.

まあ本当に孫、可愛くて可愛くて、おばあちゃんは何でもやるわっていうようなそんな気持ちになるんですが、

Well, my grandchild is really so adorable that it makes me feel like I would do anything for them.

まあね、その子育てをしてて、私も孫姫ちゃんをこう、保育園を迎えに行った。

Well, while raising children, I also went to pick up my granddaughter from daycare.

とか、2人でね、どっこ出かけたしたりとかするんだけれども、でもさ、ね、どれだけ孫姫ちゃんが、

Sometimes, the two of us go out somewhere, but you know, no matter how much Princess Mako...

おばあちゃんはおばあちゃんはとかって言って、一緒に遊んでいても、もうやっぱり子供ってさ、

Even though grandma says "grandma", and we play together, kids are still kids, after all.

求めるのは、ママとパパなわけじゃない。で、そういう絵面を見るのって、こう、おばあちゃんとしては、

What I'm looking for isn't just mom and dad. And for me, as a grandmother, seeing such scenes is...

ものすごく幸せな気持ちになるんですよ。もう娘がね、そのママ、

It makes me feel incredibly happy. My daughter says, "Mom,"

というねその生き方を今している中で

While living that way now

こんなに幸せなことってないよねっていうのを感じながら生活している

I am living while feeling that there is nothing this happy.

これはもう言葉を言わなくても

This doesn't need any words anymore.

もうすっごい響いてくる

It's really resonating now.

もう自分のこうなんていうの

What should I say about myself?

もう血管がこうなんか揺れ動くじゃないけれども

The blood vessels are like, pulsating or something.

毛穴の中にもうその思いが入ってくるよっていうようなくらい

"It's almost as if that feeling is seeping into my pores."

その愛情っていうのかしらね

Is that what you call love?

そういうものをすごく感じる

I feel that sort of thing very strongly.

でそのね娘のそういう気持ちとか思いとかに触れられる自分がね

"I'm the kind of person who can touch upon those feelings and thoughts of that girl."

またそれも最高に幸せって思う

I also think that's incredibly幸福.

反面その場面を見ると

On the other hand, when I see that scene...

もう一度自分がママをやりたい

I want to be a mom one more time.

ママになりたいって

I want to be a mom.

これは願っても絶対に叶わないんだなっていうのを

This is something I wish for, but I know it will definitely not come true.

こうなんかね改めて実感したんですよ

I felt this again, you know.

だからね子育てって

So, raising children is...

あっという間

In the blink of an eye.

本当にあっという間で

It really passed in the blink of an eye.

その実際に自分が子育てしてる時って

When I'm actually raising my own children.

まだまだあと何年もあるって思う人

People who think there are still many years left.

たくさんいると思うんだけれども

I think there are a lot of them.

本当にあっという間

It really passed in the blink of an eye.

で私はシングルマザーでね

Well, I am a single mother.

ずっと子育てをしてきて

I have been raising children for a long time.

自分の両親とかもいないし

I don't have my own parents or anything.

親戚とかおじいちゃんおばあちゃんとか

Relatives, like grandparents.

そういうのも一切いないような状態で

In a state where there's not a single person like that.

子育てをねしてきていたんだけれども

I had been raising my child, but...

あのね私がすごい

You know, I'm amazing.

ちっちゃい頃から

Since I was little.

あと何年したら

How many more years until then?

もう小学校に上がっちゃうとかね

It's already time for them to start elementary school, huh?

で小学校上がったら

When I enter elementary school

6年で卒業なわけじゃない

It's not that you graduate in six years.

6年たった6年で卒業しちゃうとか

It's been six years, and now I'm graduating in just six years?

なぜかねこんなことばっかり思ってたんですよ

For some reason, I kept thinking about things like this.

だから自分の娘に言ってた言葉は

So the words I was telling my daughter were...

保育園の時から

Since kindergarten

もうずっと赤ちゃんのままでいいからね

It's okay to stay a baby forever.

っていうのはよく言ってました

I often used to say that.

でこれはずっと小学生になっても

And even when I become an elementary school student, this will continue.

こんなアホみたいなことをね

Doing something so foolish.

娘に言ってるから

I'm saying it to my daughter.

娘からはね

It’s from my daughter.

ママは変態って

Mom is a pervert.

名言いただいておりました

I received a famous quote.

でも私にとってそのぐらい

But for me, that's about it.

その娘の成長が

That girl's growth.

愛おしくて

So lovely.

自分のね幸せなんだけれども

It's my own happiness, but...

その大人になっちゃう

That will make you an adult.

っていうその寂しさみたいなものもね

It's like that loneliness, you know.

なんかあったんだよね

Something happened, you know.

実際にさシングルマザーで

In reality, being a single mother...

その旦那さんっていう

That husband, you mean?

そういう普通の一般論で言う

That's a common general statement.

大黒柱というね

It's called the "big pillar."

その存在がいなくなって

Without that existence gone.

私一人でこの子を育てていくみたいな

It seems like I'll be raising this child by myself.

そういう自分の覚悟みたいなものの中で

In that kind of resolve within myself

いろんな葛藤もありながらだったんだけれども

There were various conflicts, though.

もうね

Well, you know...

二人の生活が最高に幸せすぎて

Our life together is incredibly happy.

ははは

Haha.

この空間は

This space is

もう私にとってのオアシス

It's already an oasis for me.

でこの空間があるから

Because this space exists.

こう何でも頑張れる

I can really do my best at anything.

うん

Yeah.

なんかそういうのあるよね

There's something like that, isn't there?

みんなあると思うんだ

I think everyone has it.

そう

That's right.

誰にも侵されたくない

I don't want to be violated by anyone.

その空間みたいなのがあったんですよね

There was something like that space, you know.

だからなんかね

So, you know...

その

That

あと何年もこんな子育て

Just a few more years of parenting like this.

なんか大変な思いするのかなっていう

I wonder if it will be a difficult experience.

そういうものがなかったっていうのは

It means that there wasn't such a thing.

ある意味幸せなこと

In a sense, it's a happy thing.

なのかもしれない

It might be.

だけれども

However

あのね

You know?

忙しすぎると

When you're too busy

いろんなちっちゃいことに

To various little things.

多分ね

Maybe.

気が抜かないというか

It's not that I can let my guard down.

多分そこを気にしてられない

Maybe I can't afford to worry about that.

ははは

Hahaha

そんなんじゃダメでしょっていうね

That's not going to work, you know.

そういう風に言われたりする部分もあると思うけれども

I think there are parts where people say things like that.

でも本当に細かいことを気にしすぎると

But if you worry too much about the little things...

あ、これがダメ

Ah, this is no good.

あれもダメ

That's no good either.

っていうなんかやっぱ

That's just how it is, after all.

ダメダメが増えてくると思うんだよね

I think the number of things that are no good will increase.

だけどめちゃくちゃ

But it's really chaotic.

もう寝る時間も

It's already time to sleep.

休む時間も

Time to rest too

うん、ないっていうね

Yeah, there's none, you know.

365日

365 days

24時間働いてます

I work 24 hours.

みたいな

Like that.

まあそんなような状況だと

Well, that's the kind of situation it is.

ちっちゃいこと気にしてられなくて

I can't worry about little things.

まあそれによってね

Well, because of that...

子供も寂しい思いしたりっていうのも

Children also experience feelings of loneliness.

もちろんたくさんあったし

Of course, there were a lot of them.

そんなママのくせにとか

"Even though you're such a mom."

そんなシングルマザーなのにとか

Even though she’s a single mother, etc.

まあそんなこと言われたりもしていたけれども

Well, I had been told things like that too, but...

でも自分がどの人生を選ぶのかっていうのが

But it's about which life I choose.

まあ一つと

Well, one thing is...

あとは私もね

As for me too.

そこの部分でもめちゃくちゃ悩んだんだけれども

I was really troubled about that part there, but...

子供は子供の人生

Children live their own lives.

私は私の人生

I am my life.

あなたは私の人生についてきなさいっていうね

You're telling me to follow your life, huh?

この覚悟

This resolve.

これを私は決めたのは娘がね

I decided this because of my daughter.

小学校1年生か2年生ぐらいの時だったんですよ

It was when I was in the first or second grade of elementary school.

シングルマザーになったのは娘が3歳ぐらいの時だったかな

I became a single mother when my daughter was around 3 years old.

ちょうど保育園のね

Just like a nursery school.

時だったんだけれども

It was that time, but...

そう

That's right.

なんか

Somehow

子供のために

For the children.

なんかこう普通のママに

Something like an ordinary mom.

普通って何?って感じなんだけれども

What does "normal" even mean, I wonder?

普通のママになるべきだみたいなね

It’s like I should become a normal mom.

なった方がいいだろうっていうのと

It would be better if it happens, right?

自分はこの生き方をして子育てをするんだっていう

"I’m going to raise my children this way."

このねやっぱり

This, after all,

どういう風に選択するっていうね

How do you choose?

それを迫られる時ってあったんですよ

There were times when I was pressured to do that.

まあこれはまた次回ね

Well, let's save this for next time.

お話ししますけれども

I will talk about it, but...

でそうなった時に私は

When that happened, I...

子供は子供だよ

Children are children.

子供の人生

Children's lives

私は私の人生

I am my life.

だから私についてきなさいっていう

So, follow me.

この覚悟をバチッと決めたんですよね

I made this resolution with absolute determination.

やっぱりママがブレてると子供もブレちゃうわけじゃない?

If mom is unstable, the child becomes unstable too, right?

だからその中で

So within that

それが正しいのか正しくないのかっていう

Whether it is right or wrong.

その判断を普通の一般論で言ったら

If we were to put that judgment in ordinary general terms,

そんな選択普通にママはしないよねっていう選択をしてきていると思う

I think she has been making choices that a normal mom wouldn't make.

だけれども

However

それを正解にするときに

When making that correct.

正解にするかしないかは自分自身なんだよね

Whether to make it the right answer or not is up to oneself, isn't it?

そう私はこれはもう1000%で大正解って言い切れるかな

Yes, I can confidently say that this is 1000% the right answer.

いろんな思いはあるけどね

There are a lot of feelings about it, you know.

そうでもねやっぱりそうやっていろんな葛藤があったりとか

Well, there are still various conflicts like that after all.

いろんな覚悟を決めたりとか

Making various resolutions or determinations.

いろんな思いがあったりとか

There were various feelings and thoughts.

やっぱりこうね生身の人間

As expected, this is the real human being.

一人の人間を

One human being.

うーんなんか育てるとか

Hmm, something about raising (it).

育てるとか

To raise or cultivate.

育てるって子育てって言われてるけど

Raising children is often referred to as parenting.

結局大人の私たちが育てられてる

In the end, it’s us adults who are being raised.

育ててもらってるなっていうのを

I feel like I'm being raised.

うーんものすごーくこのやっぱりね

Hmm, this is really something, isn't it?

年齢重ねるといろんなこう受け取り方だったりとか

"As you age, there are various ways to perceive things."

その時感じてたことと

What I was feeling at that time

今感じてることが違うこともね

What I'm feeling now is also something different.

もちろんあるし

Of course, there is.

本当にこう自分の中で大きなものとなって

It has truly become a significant thing within myself.

受け止めることがあるし

There are times when I can embrace it.

そういうのができる

I can do that.

その当時もね

At that time, too.

娘が大きくなっちゃうのが寂しいぐらいに

I'm almost sad that my daughter is growing up.

ずっと一緒にいたーいみたいな

I want to be together forever.

そんな感じでいましたけれども

I was feeling that way, but...

今またさらにね

Now even more so.

受け取り方とか見方とかも変わってきてる

The way of receiving and viewing things has changed.

だからね今子育てでめちゃくちゃ頑張ってるママとか

So, there are moms who are really doing their best with parenting right now.

そういったもう本当に世界中のママ

Really, moms from all over the world.

そしてこれからママになってくる

And now I'm going to become a mom.

ママになるよっていうね

I'm going to be a mom.

そんな人たちにやっぱりこのね

After all, for those kinds of people...

ママという生き方最強で最高っていう

Being a mom is the greatest and strongest way to live.

これでも子育てをめちゃくちゃ楽しんでもらいたいなと思って

I want you to really enjoy parenting even with this.

このねママという生き方っていうのを

This way of living called "Mama"

お届けしていこうと思って

I intend to deliver it.

ラジオで収録しています

I am recording on the radio.

ということで今日はね

So today, you see...

どれだけ願っても叶わない

No matter how much I wish, it won't come true.

たった一つのことという

They say it's the only thing.

そのテーマでお話しさせていただきます

I will talk about that theme.

今日もありがとうございました

Thank you for today as well.

それではまたねバイバイ

Well then, see you later, bye bye.